Another early start and start out with the pups. It’s a miserable day again, it hardly even got light but I’m writing this on my day bed in the spare room… now my office… with candles, twinkly lights and my Freya shadow by my side.

Someone asked me how I could be so happy at that ridiculous time of day when I shouted “morning!”…. I said…. “it’s all put on…. I’m lying, I really mean ugh morning (grumpy voice!)” she laughed!!

Was back home for 9, quick coffee and back out for kinesiology. I can feel the tears burning in my eyes on the way there. I feel bad again today. Very sad, very tired, despite a deep but dream filled sleep and I woke with a thumper of a headache.

As usual Shelagh calms my whirling mind. The session always starts with a chat then a balance. I love a balance. I can literally feel my whittering mind emptying. I’ve said before I go in like a tornado and come out like a calm breeze.

This week we dealt with self blame and how I blame myself for everything in my life. Shelagh with me to clear that once and for all. That’s what I like about kinesiology. It clears all these fears and beliefs for good.

I am so much more calm when I leave 💜

I then popped in past my lovely 80 year old friend and got a lovely birthday present from her. I’m sorry to say I had 4 cards to drop off for her 80th in October and she was over the moon with them all. She thanked everyone again for their kindness.

She had bought me a cream cookie which is essentially a bit like a roll with cream inside it. It’s not sickly sweet, it was heaven on a roll. No photos. It was scoffed way too fast!!

So ending these days on a positive note. I’m still sad and tired but it’s coming from a place of calm, a place of healing.

This is a bloody tough journey at times. Wow that brought the tears, but it’s my journey and I’m fighting on every step of the way. I would like a rest and to not have to fight but it is what it is. That day will come. This too will pass.

Stay safe everyone 💜💜💜