Day 1118 a wee morning in Stirlingshire then a food shop and home!

I had a really great sleep in Abbie the Campervan. I don’t always on my first night camping in a while, but I was so tired, I was out like a light about 9pm.

I had gone for an early evening walk last night. It’s really mild despite being cloudy and misty.

There’s Abbie up on the hill!

There were some guys from the campsite walking their dogs off lead. They had already spooked one of the horses in the field and sent it charging across the field.

Next thing I hear crazy barking down in the forest. Incessant barking and these two wee bambi guys head straight towards me!

As soon as they spotted me they about turned and careered in the opposite direction… almost back towards the dogs. They were really spooked.

Now I am a dog owner as you know. I am also Craig’s worst client but I would never be cocky enough to walk the dogs off lead if I thought they could create this much havoc.

To be fair to the owners, next time I saw them all, the dogs were on the lead.

I sent this to Craig. Maybe a good idea for a Scottish Dog Behaviourist post?!

When I got back, the lights were on!

The house looks very pretty!

There was only one incident through the night at 2.45am. I woke up to the sound of folk shouting but I think they were just drunk. I hadn’t heard a peep up until then… then a car left.

I fell back to sleep, woke at 6 and lay till after 8. It’s so peaceful apart from one dog barking…. A lot. Again not sure why the owners don’t stop that.

I headed off for a run about 9am. It’s really misty and damp but not raining, like it was forecast which is good. Everything looks really green after the rain through the early hours.

This next one is very blurry… trying to catch a bounding bunny while jogging!!

There were loads of them but this was the best shot I got. It was lovely to see them all hopping around.

Zoomed back up to the campsite.

I thought this was really beautiful. So old and mossy….

Back to the van for some peppermint tea, been fasting since 6pm last night and still going well. I sat about for a bit and watched the comings and goings on the campsite then got packed up and ready to head.

My plan was to go to the Devil’s Pulpit but there were no parking spaces. It’s one of those locations that has double yellow parking lines for at least 2 miles in every direction so there is no way you can stop. I was gutted as I’ve seen so many photos and I could only drive over the top of it.

I set the satnav for home and came to a huge car park which turned out to be the Queen’s View and the Whangie…. The most unusual name ever!

I donned the hikies at set off up the hill into the mist.

I’m not sure whether they had a fire here or whether it was controlled burning or not? It it was…. They did manage to burn the fence which you would think they shouldn’t have done!

There’s a stunning view from up here! Honestly!

I still had a lovely walk. It was so calm and quiet. You couldn’t see anyone coming until they appeared out of the mist.

I didn’t do the whole Whangie (?!?!?) as it would have taken about 2.5 hours. I just had a half hour climb up and back down.

I have pinched this photo from Google. This is what I should have been seeing!

Time for lunch!

I sat around in the car park for a while and then headed for home… via Asda for the food shop!

When I got home, the dining room is done!!

I turned the table around!

Craig’s also filled loads of Kilner jars and put them on the shelf. It’s turning into a dining room and larder, and extension to the kitchen. I love it!

So does Bhru!

I do not feel right today. I can’t quite put my finger on it but I’m feeling a lot of fear. I was nervous driving, angry at the parking situation at the Devil’s pulpit, nervous in Asda… my heart is beating out of my chest on a day when I should feeling really choked and relaxed. People scare me. I was so antsy in the supermarket. I’ve not felt anxiety like this for a while.

I don’t know why. I feel sad and tired. I feel like I don’t want to type any of this but I have to get it out. Down on “paper”.

So despite all of that. I still did what I did this weekend. I think I’m sad because I found some of it difficult. I spend my whole life wanting to go away and when I do it’s not as easy or “romantic” as I expect it to be.

Sorry. I don’t like it when I’m not buzzing with joy in the blog…. But some days are just a wee bit harder than others.

I might just go for a nap.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1117 The little gift shop and a sneaky wee night away! ROADTRIP!!!

Slept like a log again. Awake as the Scottish Dog Behaviourist’s alarm went off at 6am… on a Saturday. 🤦🏻‍♀️😆

I’m sooooo tired today. I’m thinking of going away overnight but can’t decide one way or the other. I have so many rules…. It has to be near the sea, quiet, not too far a drive as it’s only one night, preferably the west of Scotland and preferably North, not sure I fancy doing the side of Loch Lomond drive again…. Jeez… no wonder I can’t pick anywhere. Every campsite I find doesn’t tick one of my boxes…. I just need to decide which one is able to give.

I had to try and get to a bank this week to pay a cheque in, so I decided to head before work and be in Johnstone for the Bank of Scotland opening at 9am.

Honestly, the anxiety this morning has been overwhelming. I had a huge list of what if’s…. All of them ridiculous… all of them with a “but I know that won’t happen”…. I also had Craig’s car as he was using Abbie the Campervan to pick up a dining table this morning. (More about that when the room it’s going to be in, is tidier 😆)

Concerns were mainly centred on not getting back to the shop in time but so many more. What if I couldn’t get parked? I did. What if I didn’t take the right documentation with me? I only needed my bank card and I had it. What if I’d gone all that way and they wouldn’t accept the cheque? They did. What if I did the wrong thing in the bank? LIKE WHAT?!?!?!???!

Added to that driving his car….. 😳🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I stood outside the bank front door for precisely 6 minutes before they opened the door. I blithered a whole diatribe of giggly, nervous words to the lady who opened the door (I am actually laughing at that now!) and I just rabbited my way through the whole process.

As I walked away from my 4 minute transaction, adrenaline flooded through me and I felt really dizzy, like I would faint and I started to cry as I walked out onto the street. My heart was pounding.

I’m sorry but what the actual ****?!?!?!?!

There are days when I do really despair at my reaction to simple, everyday life. Now on the list… fear of banking transactions?!?! Said no one ever!!

I got to The little gift shop at 9.20 and a lady asked me about our bag sale as I was opening the shutter door…. and said she’d come back…. No, no, no, don’t be daft, in you come and I’ll get the lights on. Not turning anyone away because a light isn’t on!

The shop hasn’t stopped ALL day. I am buzzing with the excitement of seeing my total at the end of the shift. I want Gayle to be lying on her sun lounger really proud of what we’ve done.

And I’ve come close to my best Saturday morning. Easily!

By the time I get home I am shattered. I decide not to go away. I’ve lost Craig and the dogs so I sit down on the couch and breathe. I am certain I’ll end up having a nap this afternoon.

Of course it turns out he is walking them. I tell him I’m planning to just stay home when he comes back.

Then I had a thought and I asked him what he had been planning to do if I’d gone away….. he had such a nice wee evening planned that I decided I was going to head away and chill out in the van so he could have a wee evening without me being tired and moany and I could have a quiet night crocheting in the van.

Where to go…….. 🤪😂😂😂😂😂😂

I finally booked the Mountain View & Retreat only 38 minutes from the house. The sea had to give to allow me a shorter drive.

They called me straight away to say the campsite wasn’t open yet 😳 and I was to come to the West Highland Way campsite. So after finally choosing one, I’m on a completely different one! But that is ok….

So here I am.

The guy made a big fuss of me and said I was his first booking on the new site and he hugged me for that… 😬

Unfortunately it’s waterlogged. Earlier he’d said it was not quite open yet. Not sure which is true but he’s given me the best pitch on the site, so I can’t complain… not that I would anyway. 😬😆

It’s a surprisingly busy site with lots of cars coming and going. I’ve been here since 4ish and was going to go for a big walk but crawled into the van an hour or so ago and just sat curled up in a blanket. It will be a super early night!!

This is the reception area… spot the gorgeous chocolate lab.

The Aurora Borealis is likely to kick off tonight but it’s super cloudy which is a shame.

I’m at a bit of an angle so will have to turn the bed around the opposite way tonight so my feet are below my head 😆 I’m as snug as a bug in a rug and very colourful, it would seem.

I also have my running gear for the morning but it’s meant to be pouring so we’ll see how that goes. (I have my running gear?!? 🤷🏻‍♀️😂)

After all my weird anxieties I am at peace…..

Oh my god red alert for Aurora just came through!!!!!

Nope still daylight. Back to being at peace…. Electric hook up spoiling my pic!

Then all of a sudden I have horses… lovely!

Stay safe everyone 🚐🏕️🌲

Day 1116 a lovely day in The little gift shop!

I have the Conn…. as they say in Star Trek. (I think it’s an old naval term but I’m sticking with Star Trek…. 😂)

Gayle is on holiday this week and I’m in charge at The little gift shop Beith. It’s been a good day with lots of lovely customers!

Lots of new stock came in today and is already priced and out on the shelves!

New James and Co diffusers…. We have one of these behind the till when I started back in September…. It’s still smelling lovely though no oil left. That’s nearly 8 months. Not bad for £11.

Gin and whisky merch!

These are lovely just in time for King Charles’ coronation.

I’d kinda forgotten we had a King now…. Still sounds very strange to say that!

I had a great sleep…. First night off the progesterone…. It should have been the second night off but I’d done one too many. But hey…. Woke up just after 5.30 and had a generally lazy morning until I got ready for the shop.

It’s been smirry rain all day and everyone has complained about the weather. It’s a very British thing to do. 😂

I’ve had some LOVELY chats with customers today. really lovely. One lady has the busiest weekend and I’m actually stressed out for her… as I write this, sitting with my feet up, waiting for a takeaway to arrive. 😆

My head’s been good today. Long may that continue.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1115 a good day in my head!

I have a lot more patience with myself today.

I realised this morning that I get completely overwhelmed when I don’t feel right. I guess it’s maybe a fear that the bad days are coming back.

I don’t feel like I’m worrying about that at the time, but upon reflection, I do have a fair amount of anxiety about not feeling well.

That’s one of the main reasons for writing this blog…. Journalling really helps you understand your emotions. It helps you see some sense in a fuddled mind.

I am much more patient with myself today. (You’ve already said that…. 😆)

I manage to write a list first thing this morning and work through it with clarity. There are things I want to get finished before bank holiday Monday when most of our suppliers will be off work. I tick lots of it off the list even before 9am.

It’s a good day in my head.

I’m still dizzy at times but my head isn’t sore today. Craig’s is though. Oops. 😬🙄

Oh I got a mention from Butterflies and Pebbles who wrote this next one!! She said she loved The Rambling Sloth name. I felt a wee bit proud 🥹

I feel like she writes everything that I need to see! Isn’t that another lovely one she’s a fresh follow on FB and has just brought out a book called The Power of Mess.

Home via my Nail Chick tonight (😆 that’s what she called herself and I like it!) toes painted and straight back into my thick black socks and boots…. They’re a lovely, bright orangey red.

So Christmas onesie on now (coz that soooo goes with summer toes)…. Dinner’s in the oven and I’ll be wrapped up in my blanket straight after it.

I’m on my own in The little gift shop for the next two days as Gayle is on holiday. Got to be refreshed and ready for that!

Oh and it poured with rain all day today. Just in case you were missing my weather forecast!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1114 still not feeling great but lots of sunshine today! ☀️☀️

I slept really well last night. My evening spent curled up on the couch in a Christmas onesie and a blanket did the trick.

I got up for the loo at 1.30 (which is much more of an effort now that we are upstairs 🙄😆) and woke Craig too but managed to fall back asleep until just before 6am.

I felt a lot better this morning. No headache and no sluggishness which was good.

It was meant to be frosty this morning but it’s not so I’m really grateful not to have to scrape the van!

I even went outside with the dogs and took photos of the forest flame. It’s so beautiful!

It was nice to catch it in the sunrise light.

Those colours are just stunning!

I gradually felt worse as the day went on and had a lovely half hour lunch in Abbie the camper van at 1pm.

It’s always hard to leave the van as it feels like I’m on holiday every although I’m just sitting outside work! It’s super toasty inside with the sun streaming in the windows. Still not warm enough to sit outside though.

I’m still feeling lightheaded and dizzy with sore head and sore eyes.

I’ve realised though that most of us at work have similar symptoms though so it’s not just me and might be a thing….

I’ve cancelled crochet for tonight and will coorie up again. As snug as a bug in a rug… as Gran would say!

Don’t panic though. I still have my appetite. 🙄😆

I am actually sitting out in the back garden writing this. My eyes only half open 🤦🏻‍♀️😆 and I got big cuddles from Freya!

The Scottish Dog Behaviourist says I can sleep in the spare room. 😆 I told him he can 😂

Stay safe everyone ☀️☀️☀️

Day 1113 not the best day but certainly not the worst!

I’m writing this wrapped in a blanket in my “Christmas” onesie…. Totally out of season but it’s the first time I’ve been warm since I got home.

And we just had a mini explosion in the house as Craig moved his laptop! I screamed. A loud pop and a flash….. 💥💥💥

That did nothing for my nervous disposition today!

What a day….. I went to bed with a headache and woke with a headache. I haven’t been able to shift it all day.

I’ve felt dizzy on and off all day. I’ve thought my vision has been blurred at times. I’ve had brain fog and almost want to shake my head to clear the cotton wool feeling.

I came home to a plate of sandwiches from Holly next door, left over from something in the pub. I nearly cried with relief that I didn’t have to cook dinner. Total overreaction but soooooo grateful for them!

Now I should say here. I did a bit of reminiscing to my old working life today and I can honestly say that todays bad day is NOTHING compared to the bad days I have had. I am absolutely fine.

It’s been lovely weather. Beautiful sunshine, though cold. I also noticed that everything is really starting to bud now. The trees are growing greener every day.

(Laptop update, it was the charging cable that’s blown…. New one plugged in and all good! )

I listened to Eckhart Tolle on the way home. He always calms me down. My ego has been caught up in the drama of feeling rotten today. How funny that his podcast said that today. It released all the tension as soon as I realised that was true.

So hey, it’s nothing that a massage and a good sleep won’t fix…. So it’ll have to just be the sleep… and the Christmas onesie obviously 🙄😂😘

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1112 and the days just march on!

The best sleep last night. Woke at 5am, when the Scottish Dog Behaviourist got up and felt like I wouldn’t get back to sleep.

My mind was racing with all the thoughts of the coming day. I tried to pull myself back into the present moment and appreciate that I could still lie in bed for another hour or so.

I actually thought how it would feel if I jumped in to bed on a Saturday afternoon for a nap. I am aware of a completely different feeling wash over me. Rather than the Monday morning stress of desperately trying to sleep when you know you have to get up in an hour, I snuggled down and appreciated an afternoon cozy nap.

I had to fight the Monday morning feeling a few times but I ultimately relaxed more than I was.

I went into work early to get my Vinted sales ready for posting. I’ve order shipping bags but they won’t come until tomorrow and two of the girls who bought from me wanted the parcels really quickly.

I found my anxiety really mounting.

What if I send the wrong thing to the wrong person, what if they are not clean enough, what if there are too many dog hairs when the parcel arrives, what if, what if, what if?!?!

I had some bags from the house and cut a big one up in work to make the other two. What if I’m not wrapping them properly? What if they rip? What if? What if? What if?

They have to be sent with Evri and we have an Evri depot across from work. The guy who delivers from us has always said if we have anything then just to pop over with it.

I cannot tell you how hard I find that….. walking out the yard and over their car park. Even writing this at 7.20pm I feel the anxiety welling up inside of me.

I know it is ridiculous. I feel everyone is watching me as I walk across their huge car park…. Which stretches for miles as I start to cross it. It keeps getting longer. Folk in the warehouse are looking at me wondering what on earth I am doing.

The welcome from our normal Evri man seems like a figment of my imagination….

The guy I speak to looks at me like I have three heads. He has never heard of the concept of someone dropping off parcels for onward delivery… 🤦🏻‍♀️

He takes my bag out of my hand, extremely reluctantly. He walks across to a big bin-like crate, and dumps them in, walks back to me, hands me my bag and his work is done.

I, on the other hand, dissolve inside like the world is about to end. My precious parcels are dumped in a tub and as far as I know, they might never be seen again!!!!

I know…… I hear myself but honestly I cannot tell you how bad it feels at the time.

It’s like a panic attack. The anxiety ripples and waves through me.

I called Craig on the way back to talk me down.

After all this time I still need someone else to tell me it will be ok….. even if I have to tell them that they just have to tell me it will be ok!! (Read that again if you have to…. It does make sense eventually!!)

A few things in work continue this new anxiety thing but eventually I settle down into the rhythm of the day.

Around 11am I get 4 notifications that my parcels have been scanned. I actually laugh out loud!!

Work was good, but busy with visitors so I didn’t touch much of what I needed to do.

I didn’t finish up until 4.30 but I met some lovely people today. One woman and I are convinced we’ve met before but neither of us could place it…. Funny when that happens.

I stayed on to wash Abbie the camper van as she was soooo dirty.

Just noticed the reflection of the Tartan Campers logo!

Home for some lovely Craigie venison lasagne and garlic bread. Very grateful to come home to such a lovely dinner. He’s awright sometimes really. 🙄😂😘

Now doing a face mask that randomly matches my hoodie.

And relax!

Stay safe everyone 💙💙💙

Day 1111 now that’s a whole lotta blogs 🤗♥️

Well I had no idea that day 1111 was just around the corner. You’d think I’d have sussed it eh?!? Not…. a…. clue…. 😂

So on a day with a memorable number, I usually like to do a wee stat recap… so that I can find it when I look back. It seems appropriate to a bit of reflection on day 1111.

Having had to leave work in a puddle of tears in September 2018, and being made redundant in February 2020, I’ve managed to achieve the following…

  • 1,571 days without alcohol
  • 1,111 days writing a daily blog
  • 755 days since I started working in Tartan Campers
  • 617 days without any form of antidepressants
  • 178 days on HRT
  • 1 day since my first drag show 😂

I don’t give myself much credit but the bit that really gets me is the amount of time off the anti-depressants. I can’t get my head around that as I relied on them so heavily for so much of my adult life.

I’m so proud of that. I have fought so very hard to get better, even on the days where I felt like I couldn’t go on.

Also the giving up drink living next door to the village pub… that’s taken some sheer grit, determination and willpower.

I could have a drink now if I wanted but I finally realised that I am choosing not to. I much prefer the me that isn’t always looking for the next glass of wine.

Mental Health is a difficult one… if you really want to fix it you have to find a treatment yourself, and pay for it, despite us having the NHS and work bloody hard, when every bit of you just wants to give up. You have to take control when you are at your lowest ebb. I put on 4 stone and am thankfully slowly losing it now. Jeez it was such a rough time and I’m so grateful for how I feel now. It’s such a relief to be in a good place mentally.

I’m getting through all of this on chocolate alone 😆🙄 and I ain’t giving that up anytime soon!!! (obviously there’s the free therapy at The little gift shop too 🤗💜♥️)

So, back to my day, well yesterday to start… a quick photo of the Village Hall Committee with our drag Queen!

We were up at 6am this morning and I decided to start putting things up for sale on Vinted.

I had a lovely wee surprise when I realised it had £67 in my Vinted account from the last time I sold things.

Who knew?!?! I did wonder where the money went when I sold stuff before but never really checked up properly…. Julie half a job, I know…. I know Claire next door has just rolled her eyes and laughed hard at this 🙄😆😘💜

I’ve already sold 2 pairs of hiking boots, a pair of Converse and a pair of Montane walking trousers. Some of it sold within minutes of putting them up for sale. People have been messaging all day.

We’ve tidied and cleaned but the house, after our room move but it’s still very much a work in progress.

We finally sat down for a lovely coffee and chocolate at 2pm.

I took the dogs out on two separate walks this afternoon. Calaidh first…. With her frisbee….. which she only let go of once, the whole walk!!

Craig snapped us from the living room window! The frisbee is now very muddy and a lot less red!

Then it was Bhruic and Freya’s turn and I took a tennis ball up into the field.

I love that they take it turn about and know they have to wait.

So that’s been my Sunday… oh we had the loveliest dinner… leftovers from the village pub again. We are soooo lucky!

So that’s the weekend almost over. It’s been a good one.

Oh and we didn’t get the big UK alert… after all that excitement…. we are with 3 mobile….

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1110 the little gift shop and a Drag Lunch in our wee village hall!

I didn’t feel good when I first opened my eyes this morning. I felt very tired and sad. My head felt really foggy again.

I put my eye mask back on (these things are a godsend!) and rolled over.

All I kept thinking about was a lack of time….

I have so many things that I want to do but I am working all the time (not true!) and when I’m not working I am very carefully planning my rest time. I’m tired.

I’m already thinking it’s Saturday morning and by tomorrow night it’s time for work again on Monday.

No gratitude for, what is, a lovely time of the week for me.

I fought the “to dog jog or not to dog jog” this morning and figured that I did actually need the rest. I had a quick look at The Rambling Sloth FB feed.

This ♥️

I lay there and thought this over and over in my head. I tried to silently meditate and push all negative thought away.

I don’t think I slept again but when I did get up I felt completely different. My head is clear, I feel a little buzz of excitement for the day ahead.

I stripped the bed and got it in the machine…. it’s washed and hung up to dry before I head to The little gift shop.

I enjoyed getting ready for work. A bit extra makeup as I’m out this afternoon.

Always amazes me how my Fb is set up… “quit complaining and count your blessings. Exactly what I needed to see!!

I took this lovely photo the other night but forgot to post it yesterday. There was a lovely sunset sky outside, Craig had an old paraffin lantern, that’s he’s cleaned up, burning away on the window ledge. With the birth light of the tv… He’s relaxing back watching tv under his crochet blanket. I love how a photo builds up like that.

This is my new view 😂

So this afternoon’s entertainment was something else!! A drag act in the village hall.

Well….. my ears are ringing…. I’ve felt a huge wave of different emotions today but most of all I am really glad that I stepped right out of my comfort zone.

Sat in the village hall with most folk drinking and a drag act stripping off in front of us…. Honestly is my idea of hell. I went from cringing to the point of building abs as my stomach was pulled in so tight, to laughing and singing and then cringing all over again.

Honestly, his sound system really let him down and we couldn’t hear much of what he said….. and he wasn’t the best (not that I have any comparison) but…. The sound of so many women singing along to his songs was pretty special. I love everyone joining in. I got loads of videos to share with the girls.

Here are my “dates” for the day, Evelyn and Shelagh. I’m so grateful to them for coming with me.

Here’s our table.

3 of the girls were great and got up with him. That really made it. They were brilliant!!

We had a lovely lunch provided by the Gateside Inn. I had pate and oatcakes to start and chicken in peppercorn sauce with rice. Super tasty!

I’ve had a laugh, I’ve had a giggle, I’ve cringed, I’ve sung my wee heart out. I don’t do stuff like that anymore. I’m super proud of myself for going and I’m sure my stomach will hurt tomorrow with all that cringing 😂😂😂

And finally….

Don’t forget that in the UK our phones are going to blast out an emergency alert at 3pm tomorrow. (23rd April).

Also so grateful that I totally turned my mood around. ♥️

Happy Saturday night.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1109 a very sunny dog walk and the little gift shop 🎁🎁🎁

Woke up at 5am…. It was almost light but even although Craig got up, I managed to fall back asleep until just before 7 when I was rudely awakened by two door barging, bounding puppers launching themselves at me!!!

I lay and never moved, trying not to laugh, despite Bhruic trying her best to get under the covers to lick my face. 🤦🏻‍♀️😆 She gave up pretty quickly, but Freya lay down and stayed for a while. Calaidh also came in and lay under the bed for a bit. She’d found a peaceful haven.

When I did get up I was really grumpy….. I feel tired, lethargic, lack lustre and irritable.

I think it might be just that time of the month. I don’t quite know where to put myself. I think I just wanted to curl back up in a ball.

Yet it’s a beautiful day. So… I got my gym stuff on and took the dogs out for a run.

I know when I feel like this that’s it’s only temporary and that it will pass but it’s so hard to fight it sometimes. it takes a lot of strength which can be so tiring.

I feel woolly headed but also like I’m wearing a metal hard hat. I feel antsy and irritable and have so little patience it’s unreal. I can’t think straight.

I really did everything I could to fight back.

The dogs were really boisterous and not that well behaved for me, to start off with, but they can always sense when something is wrong.

They did calm down and fall into an orderly trot as we ran. I began to feel better.

Just love the colours.

There was obviously something really exciting going on as the pups checked their pee-mail.

Off to the little gift shop via the pharmacy this morning. Had to pick up the last of my progesterone prescription. It’s in high demand just now and always a bit short of stock when I need a new prescription.

I drove to the big cross section at the end of our street and could feel the anxiety starting to bubble over as I sat waiting for the traffic to clear. I actually just talk to myself to try to calm it. It’s completely irrational and I manage to nip it in the bud.

It was a beautiful day today. Some customers said it was warm and some said it was freezing. Typical Scottish sunshine!

I’ve taken some photos of the lovely flowers in the shop today.

This first one, Gayle made up for a lovely customer today. It’s so pretty.

Focus on the beauty and the anger goes away.

Love this next one 💜

Mid afternoon I almost poured the kettle into the open jar of coffee! I then put the lid on the coffee and put it on the kettle base…. Not where it lives. I’m all confused and jumbled.

I’ve been concentrating on “these feelings are temporary” and “I’ve gotten through these challenges before and I will get through this today”.

I’ve had a great day at the shop and great chats with Gayle but I am shattered tonight. And this last one… ♥️♥️

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1108 another stunning beautiful but freezing day ending with a massage!

Pure blue sky all day! Still a wind that could cut you in two.

So let’s start with last night… I actually crocheted with the Hookers last night. Check me. I’ve not done that in ages. Yes I know that’s the whole point of the Crochet Hookers evening but I’ve just not been feeling the crochet vibe. 😂

Did last night!

I came home to try and lay out the squares to determine the next run of colours.

El puppers had other ideas.

I finally got it laid out the way I wanted despite their best efforts!

I’ll use that last photo to join them together the right way.

Bed at 9.15 as I was shattered.

I got up at 5.45 today and was in work for 7.30am to make up the rest of the time for my early finish yesterday.

It was a lovely drive down. The roads were quiet, the sun was huge and the sky was so blue.

Another fast day at Tartan HQ. It’s been a fab week with lots of lovely customers in and out. It’s been lovely to clear through some smaller jobs this week! Keeps me very busy.

Ellison and I actually managed to sit out at lunch, in a wee sheltered spot. Not exactly a stunning view 😂

Boss man and I left at 3.25 to head up to Paisley to pick up Ailsa, the Tartan rental van, from the garage. She has a new clutch!

I made him take some photos as we drove over the Glennifer Braes near Paisley. A full view of Glasgow in the sunshine. I don’t think any of them would have come out properly in a moving van…. He laughs at me though… oohing and ahhhing over everything I see! I’ve told him he’ll never look at a sunrise or sunset without hearing me wittering on about it!!

I then had to fly back down the road to Beith for my massage tonight with lovely Norma, in Harmony.

It was SO good. I’m yawning just thinking of it! I’m still using my birthday vouchers. I’m so grateful for the vouchers I got. Love a massage!!

So that’s my Thursday! Hope yours was good too!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1107 a beautiful day but freezing!

I so very nearly never put a blog out last night. I feel like my rendition of the weather and dog walks and work is a bit dull at the moment. That’s just normal life I guess.

I am super grateful that I’m not feeling awful. My mood is fine so no drama there!

This morning I woke at 5.32am….. to the sound of birds singing away. Only audible because we’re now in the new bedroom in the apex of our roof.

I suddenly remembered I was to be in work for 7am this morning and so very quickly, really woke up!

Jumped out of bed and decided on dog jog this morning.

We went a different way this morning.

Up the hill, so I couldn’t let them off their leads. They sooooo know what is coming.

Normally dog jog consists of me struggling to breathe and them just walking a wee bit faster. Then me running in front of them and me dragging them behind.

Not so this morning. They were bounding up that road…. To the point that my wee legs just couldn’t keep up! I posted a clip on my Insta account at theramblingsloth.

It was so lovely to see their excitement! They literally dragged me up that hill this morning. I was laughing through my breathing!

Here they are on their way back down. Much more sedate.

We did some daffodil sniffing… them, not me obvs.

It was a lovely, quick burst of exercise.

It’s been another lovely day today but fureeeeeeeeeezing!! Such a cold breeze. Lovely blue skies for much of the day.

The highlight of today was the Border Collie that came to visit Tartan HQ. I got lots of puppy cuddles…. Funny I like to get time away from mine but I’m all over someone else’s 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 I came home from work covered in dog hair… obviously I was most like covered in the first place!

So I left work at 2.30pm as we had an appointment with an accountant for The Scottish Dog Behaviourist.

We had a great meeting and got lots of ideas. The new business is really taking off and it’s great to be a part of it.

So yeah not much else to report. I don’t feel as bored with myself as I did yesterday. That’s a good thing, right?! 😂

My favourite garden plant is flowering finally. We have 3 Forest Flame.

I just love the colours and they will only grow more vibrant in the next few weeks. Spring is coming!

Stay safe everyone 🌼🌺🌸

Day 1106 writers block!

I have absolutely nothing exciting to talk about today!

We all have those days….. I’m tired, I couldn’t wake up this morning, we had a. great, busy day at work and I’ve been really lazy all evening.

I decided not to write a blog but that only lasted until 9.04pm. 😂 just saying I’m totally ok just not very newsworthy today.

It doesn’t happen very often 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1105 a dog walk and work kinda day!

Don’t panic there’s no ranting today…. Back to normal!

Up at 5.30am and out with the dogs. I still ran but there was a fair bit more walking than running. 😂 least I’m honest.

It looks like it rained heavily overnight. The roads were wet but the dogs had a good run.

Sometimes they are behind me!! I felt like THAT person dragging their dogs out for a run. 😂

I love the heaviness of the sky.

Of course I need them in front of me for decent shots 😂

A really busy day at Tartan HQ. Honestly couldn’t believe how fast the day went.

It was lovely and warm at times. Sunshine is coming. I honestly cannot wait!! I miss my flip flops.

Then it was back to dog walk with Claire after work! I cannot believe I don’t have any photos!

Here’s Bhru telling Calaidh she’s not allowed on the couch 😂😂😂

‘Scuse the language but it makes me smile!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1104 a very thought provoking start to the day…

I started the day the wrong way today. I clicked into Sky News….. 😳

There’s a reason I don’t watch, or read the news…..

The world is going crazy. There is far too much drama. Everyone seems to hate everyone else. Everyone is fighting everyone else. Why can’t we all just take a step back and let others do their thing while we do ours.

(That’s easy to say, I guess, until I find something I totally disagree with. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂)

Social media doesn’t help as we are suddenly carrying everyone else’s opinion about in our pocket.

To be fair, these days, I don’t often have strong opinions either way. These last 4 and a half years have brought out the empath in me.

I feel like I see and feel everything. I can understand why people are how they are. I understand when they are angry it’s a culmination of their day, their life experiences, their stresses, their worries, their beliefs. It doesn’t stop me being affected by it at times. I need to take a leaf out of my own book here!

I used to get quite anxious when I could see how easily they could make their lives better… but that’s not my job to fix. I have enough to do fixing mine.

I might get a bit political for some people (which is not like me at all, but, please bear with me here, it comes from a position of empathetic impartiality… 🫣 at 7.50am on a Sunday…. Check…. Me…….) but I saw a couple of things today that made me sad.

  • the 155th mass shooting in America in 2023… (it’s only mid April!) under Kentucky law, the gun used cannot be destroyed and has to go back up for auction and use 😳 there will be those who don’t see any problem with that. A gun is a gun is a gun…. And those who are incredulous that law was passed.
  • I watched the protesters at the UK’s Grand National horse race yesterday and wondered how you could be that incensed about something to risk arrest…. Then proceeded to gulp back tears as I knew the horse that fell at the first hurdle had died. If you absolutely love an animal then how can you put them through that for money?
  • I follow the Asher House on FB and YouTube, it’s a dog rescue in the States. Lee posted yesterday that a Cat rescue lady had taken her own life. She has suffered badly with her mental health all of her life and had previous suicide attempts. She did amazing work in the cat rescue world and was very vocal about her mental health. She STILL got trolled and couldn’t cope with the negativity that was levelled at her. How can anyone be so cruel?!?!
  • Look at the HATE directed towards Megan Markle. What if….. even just a teeny weensy bit of her story is true?! What if it’s all true?! It could be and we just don’t know and we are livid with her for ruining the Royal Family’s reputation.

I guess my point is the we don’t know the truth, we can appear just as wrong to the next person with the opposing belief.

We only know what we think and we have been brought up with morals passed on to us by our parents and previous generations. That does not necessarily make US RIGHT.

We can also never assume to know the truth, about anything as there is an insane amount of media coverage in our world.

The Trump supporter follows their biased news as the Biden supporter follows their biased news. Funny how I don’t quote the UK here, I don’t know who they are anymore!!! 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😂

You get the drift.

We can be angry at something for absolutely no reason and WE could be just be as bad as the person or group that we choose to be incensed at.

Just stop for a minute. And breathe.

The next time you get really angry at something… stop, breathe, take a step back and wonder where your anger is coming from.

Why ARE you so angry?

Take a further step back and wonder why the other people might have the opposing view or why they may have done what they have done. What makes them tick?

Don’t always assume the worst.

We are all scared of opposing views. In Scotland people are terrified that independence would break up our great nation and we will be weaker as a result. Better the devil you know…. Yet the other half of Scotland are desperate to get away from the lack of Scottish focus of the UK government.

Understanding this goes a long way.

Not one of us has lived the same life as the next person. Even my little brother and I are very different and we were brought up in the same house 3 years apart.

We all talk about kindness towards each other, but I think that can only be true when we take the time to understand our “opposition”.

Maybe then we can take some of the fire out of our mouths. Maybe we can douse out some of the hatred.

We all need to make a contribution to stop this frenzy.

Otherwise I will have to find an uninhabited island and go live there for the rest of my life.

I’ll have to put barbed wire up around it to stop anyone from getting to it and live my life out in blissful ignorance.

I’m sorry to throw all that at you on a peaceful Sunday but that’s a prime example of how you control your mood and this didn’t go well for me.

I usually look at loads of positive posts on a Sunday morning.

So yeah, I’ve not actually had the best day today. I’ve tidied out drawers and moved clothes around and emptied the desk, but I didn’t achieve half of what I wanted to do.

I found a lot of writing that I did when I was off sick. It’s a good way to see how far I’ve come. Today a bad day is one that just didn’t go to plan. It isn’t one that feels like the end of the world and that’s a huge difference.

We’ve had a movie afternoon as I chose to relax.

I may have had a nap too!

I’ve also re-read what I wrote this morning. The overthinking me worries about upsetting someone. That isn’t my intention.

Craig quite rightly said if someone digs up the pavement outside our front door then we have a right to be upset. Of course he’s right…. 😂😂

I just wish everyone could be kind to each other and just be.

Back to dog walks, house clearances, work and the odd van holiday. Normal service has been resumes tomorrow I promise!!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1103 a beautiful day! ☀️☀️

It’s a beautiful morning. There was frost on the roof this morning, visible from our new garden-facing upstairs bedroom. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I got the running gear on…. It’s been a week since I was last out. Need to get back to it.

I just breathe such a big sigh of relief when I’m out in nature. There’s barely a breath of wind. There’s a warmth to the early morning sun which feels lovely.

The sky is so blue. 💙

And the grass is so green. 💚

Freya didn’t get the “look at the camera” memo.

The daffodils are in full bloom and just so yellow. 💛

There must have been something pretty tasty here. The dogs love a good much of grass.

I didn’t notice it at the time but there’s a bank of mist on the horizon.

It’s just so calm and peaceful.

Keep forgetting that Craig said I should turn the phone upside down to take some photos. Tried it once this morning and it looks really good.

Just love this old gate. It’s been a while since we had a gate photo.

This one is so rusty. It’s just hanging together and no more.

Even writing this now, I take a big breathe in and appreciate the solitude and beauty of an early morning sunny walk.

The village is looking picturesque too!

Back home and the less attractive poop scoop done and I’m sitting in the garden in a T-shirt, drinking peppermint tea.

Freya always has to have something in her mouth. This is a leaf…..


This morning was also all about the tennis ball. 🎾🎾🎾

By the time I left for The little gift shop, the mist had come right in from the sea. There were misty patches all across the fields.

The shop was very bright, sunny and flowery today! It was much quieter today but probably because people saw the sunshine.

I came home and spent most of the afternoon outside. It’s lovely. I’m in a vest top when most folk would be in a jumper but that’s how I roll.

I’m clearing things from around the house into one room and also clearing out drawers. Bring everything outside, sort it into piles and take it all back in…. Yes double handling I guess, but making the most of this lovely day.

It has been cloudy on and off but in general there’s a lovely warmth to the sun.

Can you see what I see?!?

We (there’s that “we” word again) have to cut back the ivy before it threatens to take over the pub.

The Scottish Dog Behaviourist is a man of many talents…. 😂

I’m sitting on that bench now although I’ve moved it round the garden to catch the sun.

It’s so peaceful out here. Craig’s watching the football and I have my feet up. There’s only the odd sound of passing traffic and of course, lots of birds chattering away!!

And relax….. happy Saturday!

Stay safe everyone ☀️☀️☀️

Day 1102 a wee quickie 😂

It’s 6.50pm already and I have no idea where the day has gone.

My phone is out of data, which never happens. I’m catching up on so many messages from today 😂 I need to sort out a new contract…. it’s fine at Tartan and home as I have wifi but nothing today at all!!

Had another great sleep and a fab day at The little gift shop.

Stop the bus. (Bad joke from my past life…) I actually did the window in the shop today.

I say that and as I look a this photo, I see everything that Gayle did to it, or recommended….. so actually Gayle designed the window and I put it where she suggested!!! 😆 I still really enjoyed it.

So not much else from me. I’m tired tonight.

In comfies on the couch in the new living room. And relax!

Happy Friday night to you all!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1101 April sunshine and showers today 🌧️🌦️☀️

Oh my actual word. I had THE best sleep.

Wow. I’m so grateful.

I woke up at 6.10am when a dog barked (couldn’t figure out which one!) and I’m oblivious to any other movement through the night. Craig said he got up at 1.30 and I never heard a single squeaky floorboard.

Thanks to the progesterone part of HRT.

I used to say here that progesterone was not my friend. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 How times have changed….. that’s me back on it for the next two weeks. I was slightly excited when I realised I had to start taking it last night.

My reminder worked…. I didn’t get one saying start taking it, closely followed by one saying stop taking it…. Like I did a few months ago. Check me.

Is this maybe 5 months in now I think and finally the reminders are accurate. Didn’t take that long then eh?!?

It’s been a beautiful day at times. We were really busy at work so I ended up outside a fair bit of the day, which has been lovely!!

We had a photoshoot with a brand new van that we have converted. It only had 65 miles on the clock! I ran around taking loads of photos, as you do, if you’re me. 😂 I was in my element!! Will wait until work share them before I do…. Even though I took them. 😂

It was actually really warm in the sun for a bit today. I’ve got rosy cheeks. 😊

By the time I left work, it was starting to rain. I went to Aldi on the way home and got completely soaked taking the shopping back to the van. Drookit!

So yeah, a good day today.

Bhru on the other hand has lost her ball under this really annoying unit…. 😂

Looking forward to some chill time this weekend.

Stay safe everyone 🌧️🌦️☀️

Day 1100 another milestone! now that is a blog writing commitment 😂

So yeah, if you’ve been reading this week you’ll know I’m gutted it isn’t day 2000 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 I wonder if I’ll cope with adding a day to the 1100’s without thinking 2000 is just around the corner?!? 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ funny how your mind works. Or funny how mine works.

Didn’t sleep great last night but Fitbit says otherwise. I did my usual mind searching for why my sleep felt broken?!? I have nothing…. 🤷🏻‍♀️

It was super wet and stormy last night and we usually hear nothing in old bedroom with it’s foot thick walls…… not so silent in the apex of the roof maybe?!?

We’ve love hearing the sound of the weather, it’s a bit like camping but in luxury!

So you know me…. These days I’m a bit of a home bird. Even more so now that I can’t wait to get home to my “new” house. I just want to be here all the time!

I got up early to put away lots of washing. I sat in our new living room and had peppermint tea. I felt like I was surrounded, can’t think why?!?

Don’t leave us mum, don’t go to work. Sooooo could have stayed home today. It’s just too exciting and I want to keep doing “stuff!”.

Anyway, work was great. Lots of customers coming and going and I always love that. The day flew by.

A bit deja vu like… this is dinner!! Only pizza tonight but still better than a bag of crisps.

This photo showed us the foldy up table under the couch cannot stay there…. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Craig has painted the “sky” on this rooms tealight village…. The boy is obsessed. 😂

I should be clear here and say the tealight village has moved rooms… we don’t have two 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 we do still have the dark painted shelf in the old living room… I’m sure Craig will already be wondering what he can put on it. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

So the only negative to this room is the fireplace. It’s been all blocked up and we used to have the bed cover it up.

Craig cleaned it all out this afternoon and has put some tea lights in it to try and brighten it up. Can’t wait to see what it looks like in the dark.

We obviously want to do something with it but it will have to stay like this for a while.

Forgot to put this in yesterday, Rachel two doors down sent me a photo last night of “ma boat” down in Newcastle!


So not much else to report, I have the Crochet Hookers tonight and I may actually take my crochet with me tonight! Imagine….

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1099 the day before day 2000 right?!?

What is it with me?! I’m gonna be so disappointed when we hit day 1100 and I’m still expecting it to be day 2000 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

Anyway, FANTASTIC sleep last night. It seems I can only drink water and decaf coffee to have any chance of sleeping these days. Goodness only knows how I slept on 6 cups of coffee and a bottle of red wine in the olden days?!?!

I’m still loving the hotel/holiday home effect of swapping bedrooms. It gives you a wee smile as it just feels so very different waking up in a new room. It also helps that the rooms that we have worked on are actually spotlessly clean. I can’t tell you how good that makes me feel. A tidy house is a very tidy and clear mind, in my head.

I still have a computer in the small toilet, an extra door in the bathroom and stuff everywhere but the potential is so exciting!!!

Craig’s been a superstar today and moved us into the new living room which was our old bedroom. We’ve decided to call the rooms by their new names…. The living room formerly known as the bedroom 😂😂 gets a bit wordy.

He’s moved so much furniture on his own!! I am very grateful as I really wasn’t relishing the “bite your head off” furniture move. 😂

It’s 7.20pm and I’ve had to force myself to sit down and write this. I’ve been putting things away trying to control the mess.

I’ve cooked a lovely Aldi crumbly Mozzarella and Balsamic Chicken with herby potatoes and broccoli. I ate it in my new living room. The tv seems very far away 😂

It seriously needs decorated but that will have to wait.

It’s lovely to have this feature wall as part of our living room and not just behind the bed.

The tealight village has found a new home!

And finally my Hope Blamire original painting has pride of place on the wall. Think Bhru is checking it out?!?

This is how the room used to look!

I’m sure we’ll change it a lot moving forward but it’s lovely to have something to focus rather than vegging in front of the tv!

I’m listening to Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place podcast today with Melissa Urban. She’s written books on setting boundaries and she talks about the importance of putting yourself first before others.

Now it’s quite toe curling at times but it’s a great listen. I’ll post the link.

Happy Place – setting boundaries

Boundaries have really helped my recovery. They are not easy to set. Awkward and difficult to stick to at times but I need to be strong to help keep my peace. I can’t do anything that I don’t want to do anymore as I not my best self.

I’m not proud of some of the things I have done but I have done them for, what I thought, were the right reasons for me. I know I have upset some people along the way but good friends will understand and respect your boundaries.

The podcast is a great listen.

Off to do some more tidying up!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️