I am sitting right here… right now….

I’m back at Portencross (on the west coast of Scotland) sitting out on the rocks and it’s the first time I’ve been here in ages.

It’s not massively warm, there’s a strong breeze blowing but the sun is promising a return.

It’s been a better day today but I needed my fix of the sea.

I felt really tearful when I woke this morning as my head was still not in a great place but I tried really hard to get myself out of it. I read this….

That’s exactly it…. Every emotion is telling me something. I used to skid my way through life from one drama to the next swallowing it all down, plastered a great big smile on my face, tried to be everyone’s friend, put everyone first, drinking wine to try to cover it up and make me smile then on to eating Cadbury’s Chocolate Buttons to do the same thing. 🤣

Yet now my emotions are screaming at me to face them. Head on. And just sit with them.

It’s a horrible feeling when you try to decide the cause of the upset…. but it needs doing. I’ve always rushed to talk about everything so I get validation that it’s right to feel the negative thoughts… it’s justified.

I shouldn’t need to do that. I should be able to validate things myself.

I went into work with a much calmer head that yesterday.

The Universe whapped a few doozies at me first thing but I didn’t lose my shit. I felt calm and looked for resolution.

A guy just kayaked past me, don’t know who got more of a fright, him or me?! I’m right down by the water on the rocks and no one else is around!

I’ve had to come back up to the van as the wind didn’t let me find the peace that I needed. Sitting here now is really helping calm my mind.

Of course I still have way more photos to share.

My stomach is telling me it’s time for food. It is 6.40pm after all.

I’ve made good food choices today and I’m still not pigging out on junk food, I’m opting for healthier options. Long may that continue.

Some arty van shots….. 🤣🤣

A lovely lady sent me this today and I know it to be true.

The difficult days are sent to teach us more. As hard as they are.

The sun is out over my shoulder. I am present in the moment. No worries, no fears, no anger, just present and it feels so good.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️