Oooooh it was a cold one today. The forecast was beautiful this morning….

So that never happened!!

Don’t think I saw the sun all day as it ended up super cloudy. To be fair, I was too busy to be outside but I was hoping for a lovely sunshine swim tonight. Instead it was very similar conditions to yesterday.

That sounds negative, I don’t mean to be. It’s lovely and calm and lovely to have a swim. After a busy day.

On our way in, water up to the boobies 😳😂 took us a wee minute to get our shoulders under.

The phone didn’t work much today and sadly stopped the 20 minute timer as it just did it’s own thing 😳😂 I think we knew when it was too cold and had to get out.

The water felt colder than yesterday but it may have been because there was more of a breeze.

How many chins!!?! Actually sent this to mum when she messaged and we were out in the sea. That was the only thing that actually worked phone wise. 😂

As I say that…. I KNOW it’s not all about documenting it. It’s just so exciting for me to be out there that I want a record of it. I will learn to appreciate the moment without the millions of photos and video clips.

I actually had pretty bad stomach cramp today. Way more painful than yesterday. It took the ooomph out of me a bit. I picked a task that’s needed doing for ages and concentrated on that, so I could see progress and feel like I was achieving something without having to think too hard. I

The cramp has been bad the last few months but I notice way more benefits of HRT than this one negative. I’m still documenting all of my menopause symptoms in the Balance app every night. I used to have a HUGE list of symptoms the intensity of each of them has reduced. Except stomach cramp.

Now that I’ve been swimming, it’s so much more relaxed. Such a relief. At one point today I thought I might not manage the swim.

And finally…. This is the reason I write this blog…. So that everyone knows that you don’t always feel how you look on the outside.

I share all my gloriously flawed and messy wondrousness. 😆

I love it!!

Stay safe everyone 💙🏊🏼‍♀️♥️

I had a great sleep again but woke with stomach cramp. Paracetamol didn’t touch the sides. It’s been really sore all day and grumbling away sitting at my desk.

It was a really busy day at work! Didn’t even open my diary to see what I was meant to be doing today…. 🤦🏻‍♀️😆 but that’s ok.

Ellison and I went for our first sea swim by ourselves, just the two of us, I feel like we graduated to be allowed out😆 …. And we had a great swim. 🏊🏼‍♀️

We went to Irvine beach tonight. It was meant to be really sunny but there was quite a bit of cloud cover, so no dramatic sunset. The sea was really calm and peaceful and there were no other swimmers at all.

It felt like we had the sea to ourselves. I set the timer on my phone for 20 minutes so we didn’t stay in for too long. That’s our limit just now.

Not a breath!

Wee selfie before we head in.

It’s shallow really quite far out in Irvine.

Looking over to the Isle of Arran.

The camera didn’t work much again but it gave me a chance to enjoy the surroundings. It’s hard for me not to get snaps and video clips but it’s also good that it doesn’t work all the time.

It also takes pics and videos of its own accord at times 😂 think this next one was one…

Finally dressed and having a hot cuppa and a choccie biccie (or two!)

Not a hint of cramp since!!

Might do it all again tomorrow night. 🏊🏼‍♀️🏊🏼‍♀️

The Aurora Borealis (Nothern Lights) were beautiful last night and they are forecast to be as good tonight. I was out in the garden in a dressing gown and furry boots (😂) last night but couldn’t see anything.

The cloud cover is pretty intense here until 1am but I’m not sure I’ll manage to stay awake for that!

I’ve seen so many stunning photos that people took from their houses…. Absolutely blew me away. Isn’t nature wonderful?!?

Stay safe everyone 🏊🏼‍♀️🏊🏼‍♀️🏊🏼‍♀️

I am not gonna lie…. Today has been anxiety central for me. Worrying about the day I never saw. I used to love driving Abbie the camper van but for some reason, recently, she seems 10 times the size and I am nervous driving her.

All the little things that have gone wrong in the last few years, have blown up out of all proportion in my head. Also, to be fair to me…. It’s that time of the month, all of a sudden, it seems like no time at all since I was on hands and knees on the couch with last months stomach cramp. I am still certain that HRT is the way forward but I’m not enjoying this part.

I’m meeting family at the Bridge Inn in Linlithgow at 1.30pm. It takes me 54 minutes to get there. I leave with 2 hours and 10 minutes to spare, just in case!!

Craig is home as Rangers and Celtic meet in the Cup Final today. He’d be a nightmare sitting through lunch wondering what was going on in the game! It wouldn’t matter so much to him if it wasn’t the two rivals playing.

I had a fear about the size of the car park and it would seem it was a well founded…. The car park is tiny compared to my monster sized van. I was able to get turned around and park based on it being way busier later on. I should be able to drive straight out of my space. It took a lot of too-ing and fro-ing to get into the space.

This is ridiculous. I really need to nip this in the bud as I can’t be nervous driving it otherwise I’ll never go anywhere.

Anyway…. The restaurant is beautiful.

That’s the positive to arriving super early. I can have a wander and get my anxious breath back.

I’m sitting outside in the beer garden, it’s cold but a nice warmth when the sun comes out. I was here an hour early but it’s now only 25 minutes. Time flies when your mind is full of worry.

And breathe.

The interior of the pub is just as nice as the outside. It’s so tastefully done. Really rustic. I love that word… 😂

There are 11 of us for dinner so we didn’t know in advance but it turns out there’s a set menu for groups of 10 or above. Who knew?!? I suppose it’s understandable and there were about 5 options for starter, Main and dessert… at £31.95 for three courses.

Now I’m used to the village pub next door that’s still not above £20 for 3 courses…. But that’s ok.

The food itself was lovely, really tasty and well made but my main and my pud were both different to what the menu described. I was particularly disappointed at my berry crumble with ginger and lemon crumble…. Being apple crumble!!! Now this might be a very British thing, but we do not complain. We just moan our way through it and accept we deserve what we get. It’s too hard to complain.

It was great to get a good chat and catch up with everyone. I also made it back through Glasgow before the Cup Final was over and missed all the traffic!!

So there are positives in my day….. lovely to see everyone and see that beautiful restaurant. To face my fears driving over on such a beautiful day and to be sitting in front of the fire now with this bar of chocolate.

Since I took that photo… the chocolate has actually gone already 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 och I musta needed it! 😆

Back on the fast with a hot water bottle for the cramp 🤕

Stay safe everyone 🍫🍫🍫

Another wonderful sleep last night… I’ve been sleeping so well this week. It’s great. Long may it continue.

I got up early and took all 3 dogs out for a walk/run first thing and it was beautiful.

Running and taking photos and video clips. Multitasking at its best. I had a great run.

I did have a bit of a poop incident on this path…. Dog poop, obviously!

The poop bag burst….. in my hand…. I had nothing else I could use, except a second, equally split bag…. 🤦🏻‍♀️. I had to run with said burst bag of poop and 3 dogs until I got into the village to the nearest poop bin…. The lengths us dog owners go, to not be one of those dog owners who leave it lying on a path! 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

What a way to start the day….

After hours of hand washing… I headed into The little gift shop.

We had a lovely wee day at work today. Got lots of new bags unpacked and out on the shelves and we were so busy working, I forgot to take photos.

Up the road for about 1.30pm, had a bite of lunch and then finally got back into the wetsuit ready for a swim at 3pm!

Look who I bumped into! Claire all set for a lovely day out looking all smart and me in my wetsuit and dryrobe… it needed a photo!

Now the camera did not play ball today. I only got a few photos and to be honest, I gave up and actually just enjoyed the view.

Should say we went to Seamill Beach today.

It was cold but way warmer than my last swim on 2nd January. It was really lovely out there today.

I love it!

This is West Kilbride.

It was sunny but cloudy so some photos look really mean and moody.

Eileen got her little campfire out again and we had toasted marshmallows and some lovely empire biscuits that one of the girls brought. All with hot peppermint tea in my flask.

Some lovely silhouettes as we stood.

Beautiful.

I’ve had a lovely day. I’m tired now. Had a hot shower and all wrapped up for a night of movies in front of the fire!

Happy Saturday night!

Stay safe everyone 🏃🏻‍♀️🏊🏼‍♀️💩

Another wonderful sleep last night… I’ve been sleeping so well this week. It’s great. Long may it continue.

I got up early and took all 3 dogs out for a walk/run first thing and it was beautiful.

Running and taking photos and video clips. Multitasking at its best. I had a great run.

I did have a bit of a poop incident on this path…. Dog poop, obviously!

The poop bag burst….. in my hand…. I had nothing else I could use, except a second, equally split bag…. 🤦🏻‍♀️. I had to run with said burst bag of poop and 3 dogs until I got into the village to the nearest poop bin…. The lengths us dog owners go, to not be one of those dog owners who leave it lying on a path! 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

What a way to start the day….

After hours of hand washing… I headed into The little gift shop.

We had a lovely wee day at work today. Got lots of new bags unpacked and out on the shelves and we were so busy working, I forgot to take photos.

Up the road for about 1.30pm, had a bite of lunch and then finally got back into the wetsuit ready for a swim at 3pm!

Look who I bumped into! Claire all set for a lovely day out looking all smart and me in my wetsuit and dryrobe… it needed a photo!

Now the camera did not play ball today. I only got a few photos and to be honest, I gave up and actually just enjoyed the view.

Should say we went to Seamill Beach today.

It was cold but way warmer than my last swim on 2nd January. It was really lovely out there today.

I love it!

This is West Kilbride.

It was sunny but cloudy so some photos look really mean and moody.

Eileen got her little campfire out again and we had toasted marshmallows and some lovely empire biscuits that one of the girls brought. All with hot peppermint tea in my flask.

Some lovely silhouettes as we stood.

Beautiful.

I’ve had a lovely day. I’m tired now. Had a hot shower and all wrapped up for a night of movies in front of the fire!

Happy Saturday night!

Stay safe everyone 🏃🏻‍♀️🏊🏼‍♀️💩

Ok so I had a pretty rotten end of day yesterday and felt really low. I fell asleep on the couch before 8pm, woke up at 10 and straight through to bed, slept till 6.30am. Out for the count.

Musta needed it! I feel so much better for a decent rest.

I looked out the window this morning and saw a lovely red sky. I jumped out of bed and pulled my running gear on and went up the hill with Calaidh.

I didn’t feel much like doing anything but since then I’ve gone out a second run with Bhruic and I feel much more energetic!

Our wee village looks lovely this morning.

I love the bank of clouds that are just above the hills…. They looked like they were all around the coast.

This next gate is very proud of its Scottish roots!!

So I did run as much as I could and just walked to get my breath back a bit. Obviously I stopped to take photos. I mean I would t be me, if I didn’t take photos….

From now on I’m out with Bhru…. Not that that really matters.

Loads of planes flying over the village this morning.

So I sat outside with my Slothee Coffee mug from the Crochet girls, had a black coffee and wrote this and then decided there was still enough in the tank to take Freya out. My 3rd run/walk before 9.30am. I’m at 10,456 steps before work! I’m going to post this next one again…..

I have made a concerted effort to enjoy life and appreciate the magic of it all, today. My circumstances haven’t changed, only my reaction to them.

The sun’s much higher in the sky by the time I get out with Freya.

Dog walks ✅ ✅✅

I have also joined the Gate Appreciation Society on FB….. I just did my first post. 😂

I’ve been at The little gift shop today and been loving pricing up all the lovely new things Gayle has in. I took a quick photo of the window.

As usual we get a great chat and catch up as we work and the day flew in. I hit a wall about 3.30pm and I’m now sat on the couch with my feet up…. Knackered!

It’s been a beautiful day and it’s been lovely to chat to everyone about the sunshine. We have such lovely customers…. You know me, as much as I need to be own my own and crave silence, I love me a good bit of chat!

Craig has been is the office all day today working on Scottish Dog Behaviourist stuff. He’s been up since 5 and is still sitting there just now and it’s nearly 5pm. I’ll need to break him away from it!

Hope you all have a lovely weekend!

Stay safe everyone ☀️☀️☀️

It’s been one of the those days where wee things have got to me and I’ve allowed them to spoil my mood.

I feel like a grumpy child having a tantrum inside my head because I can’t get my way.

It’s funny how “she who was floating on air” yesterday, is nowhere to be seen today. It was a beautiful morning first thing…. We were back up to the garage this morning so there were two campervans outside today.

Claire had sprayed de-icer all over Ailsa the tartan camper’s windows before she got to work, how considerate of her!

I thought I’d be clever and start up the diesel heater in Abbie, so she would be all defrosted and super toasty by the time I got back home…. An hour later she still has frosty windows and the error is back on the heater. Grump. Instead of driving to work in the beautiful sunshine and appreciating the view, I drove super grumpy and didn’t realise I’d got there until I was there. I’ve spent the day thinking I’ll just sell the van…. Get a wee run around with zero road tax and decent mpg….. overreaction much.

We had the pop top up at work today showing a customer…. Couldn’t resist a photo.

There is a very good chance that the hormones are raging at the moment.

I actually went through to the bedroom and punched the bed like a punch bag. I almost allowed myself to smile. That felt good.

I’m tired and feeling a bit sorry for myself… that’s all. I have a super busy weekend again and I just need some time to do nothing….. tonight I made dinner, did a washing and hung it up, washed the dinner dishes. I work hard when I’m grumpy!

I have chosen to just exist today and that’s not good. More effort required tomorrow.

Tonight I’m just gonna sit in whatever this is…. And feel it.

I also had some chocolate cake. 😆

Stay safe everyone and outta my way!! 🤦🏻‍♀️😆😘

What a beautiful day. What a difference the sunshine makes to our everyday lives. I’m just as busy, just as tired but that blue sky 💙💙💙

I’m currently standing here as I write this, it’s not hot but there was a real warmth to the sun when I sat outside at lunchtime.

I never miss a chance to get outside!

It’s been a busy day but a bit more exciting today as I had to run Craig to the garage in Paisley this morning and collect Ailsa the Tartan Camper that’s been in for MOT and service before the season starts. (That was the longest sentence ever and also laughable I find that exciting!!)

We were there for 8am. Then had to pick I some stock from a supplier at 9. On the day back we went over the Glennifer Braes from Paisley back to Gateside.

I pulled in to get some great photos of Ailsa with the view but the light was not our friend this morning!

You can see as far as Ben Lomond from here but none of that is visible in the shots.

So into work for 10 and a very busy, crazy day until the back of 4. I had caffeine this morning. I is buzzin….. 😂😂

It was so nice to feel the sun on my skin at lunchtime. Ellison had brought me lentil soup and a buttered roll again. It was sooo good.

I decided to head down to Irvine Beach Park after work to catch the sunset. Wow. I’ve really missed this.

I had to climb this first!!

The dunes here are stunning.

By the time I got up the hill to the dragon there was a family climbing all over it…. Dammit. My pics are cutting them all out.

Of course when I get back over the hill they are gone!

This is Ailsa Craig, where the rock for all the worlds curling stones comes from 🥌

And breathe.

Craig’s new business is going so well. He’s booking jobs in and creating lots of online content. It’s so exciting.

This wouldn’t happen without everyone continually sharing his posts. Very are so very grateful!

Not gonna lie. My hands are frozen stiff. The decision is a difficult one. To stay and wait for sunset or to head home and get dinner before crochet?!?

The tide has gone out fast.

I cannot tell you how good this makes me feel. Fresh air and blue sky. Heaven.

I’m moving before I freeze to the spot!!

What a wonderful day to be alive.

If I come back tomorrow I’ll have warmer clothes!!

Stay safe everyone ☀️☀️☀️

Day 1050 eh?!? The days are just racking up 😂

You know I love me a little stat and I have precious little to say tonight….. at the risk of sounding completely repetitive and boring myself…. It was another crazy busy day at work today. Not enough time to swing a cat. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I had a great sleep until someone’s alarm went off at 5am. Someone fell back to sleep while I lay and did some work in my head. 🤔🤦🏻‍♀️

Back to the stats eh….

• 1631 days since I walked out of the office in floods of tears no longer able to function
• 1510 days since I gave up self medicating with alcohol
• 1050 days of writing this almost daily blog…. I know I duplicated days at the start so it’s actually been more than this but I’m just splitting hairs 😂
• 951 days since I last touched a drop of alcohol
• 694 days since I started work with Tartan HQ
• 556 days since I stopped taking anti-depressants
• 151 days since I started working at The little gift shop
• 117 days since I went on HRT
• 63 days since I started daily fasting
• 3 days since Craig launched the Scottish Dog Behaviourist and started the next chapter of our lives
• 1 day since I said I was busy at work and tired!

So yeah…. That’s the best way to sum up today, on a big positive.

I even went food shopping after work for the first time, in what feels like, forever. I bought lots of veg and came home and ate a cheese roll and crisps. 😂

Can’t win ‘em all.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I’ve written the opening paragraph 3 times already and I sound like a right grump…. So I’ve deleted it!

It’s been smirry rain all day but that’s also not the end of the world. It’s that fine rain that soaks you, as my Gran would say!

There’s nothing wrong with me, I’m just tired.

I had the best sleep… this was the first Monday with no Farm so I actually got a good 7 hours and 51 minutes…. Bliss.

We’ve just had another really busy day at work and the day has flown in. I find it hard to write the same thing every day….

It’s been a good day. My head’s been good but after 19.5 hours of fasting, I did know that I needed to eat to clear my head. It got a bit fuzzy just before lunchtime.

Craig’s Scottish Dog Behaviourist FB page membership has been growing well. The sharing of his FB post over a Saturday and Sunday, hit 7.5K people. Isn’t that amazing and we are so very grateful to everyone that shared it. He already has one booking and five more calls to make. It’s super exciting and lovely to see him so passionate about his work.

I’ve become really addicted to checking the number of his followers. I’m also super proud that he’s using many of my videos and photos!

(I have to say that I take these scarves out the drawer now and I feel like the puppers head for the hills 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 not that again… she wants more photos?!? 😆)

So I could have been really negative today. About the weather, the being super busy… blah blah… but actually I have so much to be grateful for, I’ve managed to turn it around writing this.

Always knew there was a reason I wrote this! 😆😘

Now I’m off to latibulate 😂

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

We had a lovely meal in the Gateside Inn last night, for Mum’s birthday.

Dad and I had Peppered Beef with Rice and Veg, Mum had Chicken Tempura and Craig had Chicken & Leek Pie.

Holly had laid on a bottle of Prosecco and a bottle of Nozeco for us which was so lovely of her.

Dad and Craig had lentil soup to start…. For the first time ever, I never had a starter. Unheard of!

I did, however, order the Toasted Waffles with Tablet ice cream and toffee sauce…

Of course Mum and I had to share it as it is massive!!!! but very, very good…

By the time you eaten a Gateside meal, there is nothing else for it but to put your feet up in front of the fire, especially since you were awake since 5am. 😂

We lit the tealight village when we came home and I managed to stay awake for another hour before heading to bed at 10pm. Rock me on a night out eh?!

Mum got lots of cuddles whether she liked it or not!

I slept really well and woke at 6.48 which is a lie in for me these days.

Craig did a lot of work on his Scottish Dog Behaviourist page this morning and put out a post asking as many people to share as possible. We joked that maybe 20 people would…. We are so very grateful that currently he has 118 followers now which yesterday, midday, was ZERO. The response has been phenomenal and we are truly grateful.

88 people have already shared his post! This is where social media plays a great role…. in creating awareness.

He’ll be doing 2 or 3 posts a day to help us understand our dogs a bit better. Jeez I’m tired, you know what I mean but that didn’t even really make sense to me!

He went off to meet the village woodcutters at 10 and Mum and Dad and I headed down to Gro Coffee in Irvine. Here are the pups getting settled when we left.

Here’s Mum in Gro on her Birthday Boxing Day!

The food in Gro Coffee is out of this world. I had the breakfast taco, Dad had an omelette with Cajun chicken and Mexican veg (which resembled a calzone pizza) and Mum had poached eggs with smoked salmon. It was exquisite.

Mum bought a huge strawberry tart for Craig and we went for a freezing cold, brisk walk along the promenade!

It’s wild and all though 8°C, the wind chill made if feel so much colder!

I’m really looking forward to some sunshine, even just blue sky would be lovely. It’s not very picturesque at the moment though it was certainly dramatic.

We got home by 2ish and Mum and Dad left to head home. I think I might need a wee nap after all that lovely food and sea air. The wood burning stove is on in the sunroom, for the first time in ages, and I might just settle into Gran’s chair like old times.

Oh I should show you my beautiful flowers… the tulips from Mum and Dad and the roses from Claire through the week. What a lovely surprise and they’re such a joy to see. A reminder of brighter weather to come!

Thanks again to all of you who have shared the Scottish Dog Behaviourist. It’s the only way he will become known. Your distance from us shouldn’t matter as he will share lots of tips on a daily basis and eventually run online courses so that everyone can have access to his work.

For those of you who don’t have dogs…. I will talk about something else one day, I promise 😂😂😂

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

It’s Mum’s birthday today and they’re coming over this afternoon so we can have dinner in the pub next door.

It’s 2.40pm and I’m in bed to write this and catch a quick 40 winks. They’ll be here at 4pm.

It was busy in The little gift shop today, as people came in to congratulate Gayle on taking on a 3rd shop in Lochwinnoch.

There was lots of excited chat!

I also cleared away Valentine’s Day and brought out Mother’s Day. (19th March in the UK!). Cleared the shop window out and cleaned the window and the front glass door.

Craig’s also started doing loads of FB posts for the Scottish Dog Behaviourist, so I’ve been sharing all that. There’s been a lot of social media…..

So yeah, I’m tired. Been up since 5am. Dogs walked, house cleaned.

It was a dreich morning but I got loads of photos today as there was a strange light in the sky.

There must have been a lot of rain overnight as the burn was swollen.

I became strangely obsessed with the pylons today….

The sky looked so heavy….it was really unusual.

So I have an hour till my folks get here. Gonna put this out now and get a quick Power Nap!!

Have a great Saturday afternoon and evening. Pics from out night to follow tomorrow!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

It’s 5pm and I am shattered. Exhausted. Knackered…. But I have lots of exciting news to share!

Up and at ‘em for my last Fit Body Farm as a full time member 😢 never saw that coming, did you?!

It was a tough workout. 15 minutes of constant exercise, trying to do as many circuits as possible….. twice!!!!

Check the state of me by the time I was finished….

I walked up to Gavin, the Coach, and gave him a sweaty hug and started to cry…. He said that we should say “see you soon, rather than goodbye”. I hope that we will be back.

So….. you’re maybe wondering why?! Well….. 🐶🐶🐶

Craig is in the process of launching a new business and we need to use everything we have to ensure a successful launch.

This is his Fb page…

Scottish Dog Behaviourist FB

And his website…. Scottish Dog Behaviourist

It doesn’t matter where you are in the world…. If you have a dog, please go take a look and follow him. (Also in Insta!)

He’ll be posting loads of info and will eventually have a YouTube channel and online courses!

It’s all happening!

In other news, the little gift shop made a big announcement on FB today. If you’re local go check out Gayle’s FB page! Exciting times for her too!!

So I just need to make sure I keep exercising somehow, as the Farm has been very good for my mental health. I can’t let that slide.

So maybe that explains my mood in the last few weeks’….. I’ve been shattered all the time but there’s been a lot going on that was not my story to share. I’ve been supporting Craig when I’ve not been at work. He’s obviously the one doing all the hard work!

I’m really looking forward to getting involved in his new venture. Sorry in advance, if I go on about it a bit…. It means a lot to us that he is successful. Remember that we want to share as much of this worldwide with anyone who has a dog or dogs.

Feet up, movie on… and chill!

Stay safe everyone 🐶🐶🐶

What a day! 7am to 4pm with a wee cheeky half hour in Abbie the Campervan. I literally could have slept there all afternoon. I put the diesel heater on and it was super cosy.

I had the best sleep last night. It was sooo good. I felt really refreshed when I woke up.

Last night was the first night back on the Progesterone, for the next 2 weeks. It helps you sleep.

I’ve been really emotional today though. I’m not that sure why. Claire sent me this….

To be honest, I’ve never heard of dumfungled but I love it!

I am really tired. We’ve been super busy but it’s been a good week.

I started off at 7am, with the list I wrote last night and I actually got through most of it during the day. I’ve finished up tonight feeling way more organised than I did last night.

I’ve felt really sad today. There were tears a few times…. Honestly for no real reason. Could just be the hormones.

I was home by 4.40 and made a pasta bake for dinner. It was ready just before 6pm but I was heading over to the Village Hall to help set up for a Psychic Night that’s running tonight, to raise funds for the Hall.

I have the chance to go and I swithered for ages but decide not to.

One day I’ll actually go to something like that instead of avoiding it.

The girls were super lovely as we set up. Always a lovely word to say. Their kind words mean a lot to me.

I came home for dinner and am back on the fasting again.

This next one is only for laughs as I’ve not lost my shit…. 😂😂

No one wants a shit storm!

Hope the girls have the best night while I curl up on the couch.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Good sleep!!! Great sleep actually. I was still pretty hot through the night but I was out for the count until 4.15am. (yeah I know that’s ridiculously early!)

That made me laugh! So yeah, off to the Farm and the moon was AMAZING this morning. I’ve no photos as I was driving.

It was a prefect chunky crescent 🌙 and it was almost red. It just hung in the sky, not far from the ground. I was blown away by it the whole way to the Farm. I love appreciating nature like that.

I can hardly walk by the time I get there! My muscles are so tight from Friday and Monday. It was another great workout. Lots of weights and running.

The sky was lovely when I left. The sun was starting to rise. We were so lucky to get the workout done before the rain hit.

It’s lovely to leave in the almost daylight.

It was torrential rain from 8-10 ish. Stotting off the ground, such a difference from the early morning.

My day flew by in a heartbeat. Honestly, I don’t know where the hours went. It was so busy and I had people in from late morning for most of the day. I was going to stay late but I was too tired. I knew I’d not concentrate properly and end up wasting time. I’ll go in early in the morning again and try to clear the decks before the weekend. It’s amazing the business that the Show has generated for us.

I still struggle with being out of control. I’ve tried to write a list of things to do in the morning. I just need to stick to it when I get in.

I’m off to meet the Crochet Hookers in the pub next door in 7 minutes. Sure we’ll get a good chat and put the world to rights….

Oh that reminds me, Scotland’s First Minister Nicola Sturgeon resigned today. (that’s was a quick switch in conversation eh?!)

I know so many people who don’t have a good word to say about her but I’ve nothing but respect for the commitment she’s shown our country. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Stay safe everyone 💙🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿💙

I was up at 5.30am and in work for 7.15am. We’re so busy just now that I feel like I’m not making a dent in it!

There was another lovely lady’s funeral today and I passed on my apologies that I couldn’t make it. I really wanted to be there, to pay my respects but the logistics of that, and coping with the workload would have been too much. I am so very sad for her loss….

I can still hear her voice and her deep laugh. I can see her wink and feel her hug.

I also can’t walk away from the amount of work that needs doing. The people pleaser in me isn’t sure how to handle this so I have to do what feels best for me at the time.

I think about her a lot. She’s in every tree and it makes me smile. I know how ridiculous that sounds by the way. I’m just saying it how it is!

Carole this spooky tree, from last year, is just for you. I’m sure you would have commented on it.

I’m really tired tonight. I feel a bit meh and I’ve lost the giggly spring that I had in my step yesterday. Nothing that a good sleep won’t fix.

It’s also Valentine’s Day today but we’ve chosen not to do anything for it this year. I like this next one that my friend Carol-Ann shared.

And definitely this….. ♥️

I’ve just read this back and realise it sounds a bit down. I’m really not. Looking forward to my cosy, clean bed!!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I didn’t sleep great last night… woke at 1.30am, then again at 3 and finally up at 5am for Fit Body Farm.

It was a great session outside this morning. I love the outdoor workouts. It was actually light by the time I left at 7.30am!

The snowdrops are blooming in full force.

It was lovely to see the daylight that early… the forecast was for pure blue sky all day. It never really happened. I was soooo hoping for a sunset at the beach after work tonight. It was not to be!

There were sunny spells today but nothing f of any significance. Shame! I was looking forward to a good dose of vitamin D.

Work was crazy busy today. The customer enquiries have just kept flooding in since the show. It’s been an amazing response. The phone has not stopped ringing all day! I have taken more work instead of actually doing any… all day!!

It’s all good. It’s been a fun day. I’ve felt a bit excitable, a bit giggly. It’s been a lot better than getting stressed out.

I don’t like being out of control but I’ve actually laughed at it today…. That’s the way to be. And long may it continue.

I’m cuddling with Bhruic on the couch now.

Will go into work early tomorrow to try to get some done before the phones start ringing again.

So that’s all from me tonight.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I had such a great sleep last night. 8 hours and 19 minutes… I woke feeling refreshed. Clean bed has a lot to answer for.

I didn’t get night sweats for the first time in about a week and a half. I could have stayed in there all day and as I write this I think it would actually be nice to go back 😂

Had a nice decaf black coffee in my slothee mug! (from the Crochet Hookers for my 50th!)

So yeah… as usual on my day off, I want to do absolutely everything but actually I really want to do nothing. It’s half 1 already and I have dusted and polished the fire place and window ledge in the living room. I’ve tidied out the “candle” cupboard (yup we have one of those…) as it was a mess. I’ve hung one washing and put on another and I’ve walked the dogs…. For the first time in AGES!!

It’s a dull and fairly nondescript February day. It’s cold at first but then hot when you’re walking. I may have overdressed. The sky is grey and everything looks a big damp, soggy and miserable. It doesn’t make for the best photos! off out with Bhruic and Freya first.

Then back home for Calaidh.

Now Calaidh is not the most agile of dogs…. She doesn’t run half as much as the other two…. was lovely to catch her jumping this burn.

This was the most arty shot I could find… very slim pickings this morning 😂

Today was all about the water!

She really is a cutie pie.

So it’s now half 4 and I really have done nothing of any significance. I managed 19.5 hours of fasting.

I’m in front of the fire with a book while the football blares on the tv….. 😂

It’s been a restful day. I’m chilled and relaxed. I’m sure we’ll be binging Happy Valley as soon as the football is over!

Here’s to a good week ahead.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Wow, 1040, feels like about 5 minutes since day 1000…. Life is passing by at a great rate of knots.

Awake at 5am today and it’s now 6 and I’m still lying in bed so thought I’d start this early. I’ve dosed up on positivity from my The Rambling Sloth FB feed. No nasties on there.

I found this. I was diagnosed with anxiety in 2018 when I first went off sick from work. But this…. Got me right in the feels.

100%. My body wouldn’t let me do that to myself for one more day….. well it let me go back for 5 months but they were the most pointless 5 months ever…. I was there because I felt I “should”. That word again…. Think about every time you feel you “should” do something. Does that not mean that we really don’t want to do it? It becomes a chore… how does your body make you feel when you force yourself to do something that you feel you “should” do?

Mine has a stroppy child inside that huffs and puffs and waves angry arms around… seriously. She’s totally in her element when I feel I “should” do something.

I think I’m pretty selfish these days. Selfish seems a very negative word…. Actually I know what works for me and what doesn’t. I need to listen to my body and it knows what’s right for me and what’s not. If something raises that stroppy child then it’s not really something I should be doing.

I feel a detachment from people at times. I don’t have s hectic social life, I don’t see lots of people because I have to build downtime into my week. I’m ok with that but I do feel I “should” make more of an effort at times.

I’ve been really stuck by 2 people who have died recently and by how much their deaths have affected me. For those who don’t know who they are, I will say that neither of them were close friends. Jeez that sounds awful but I’m trying to say that saying sorry for my loss seems wrong as the loss is felt WAY more by others…. But I’ve been profoundly affected by both lovely ladies and they will never know the impact they had on my recovery. Oooh a wee tear escaping there.

Both of these women, who hardly knew me, took time out of their busy lives to connect with me when I was ill. One was absolutely determined to get me out of the job that had broken me and the other always with a wink and a hug and the right words at the sad times.

Where am I going with this? I guess it’s to tell you all how much we do impact other people’s lives. Someone will remember you for the smallest things… a song, a smile, a memory, a wise word, a hug, some love….

And sadly on the flip side, there will be those that we remember for the wrong reasons. If someone doesn’t feel right to you then YOU are right. Your gut instinct is right. Someone who doesn’t treat you well, makes you feel bad every time you connect with them, gives you a dog, a back handed snide remark, those are not your people.

I read recently in the Happiful Magazine. Worth a follow by the way…. You should not be scared of not being liked…… eek!

Well I have a long, long, long way to go with that one. I’m not sure how to get my head around it.

I have hurt people on my journey…. I know there are people out there who don’t like me….. but that thought could eat you up from the inside out. That is not a pleasant feeling. I’ve attached a link to the article though so you can all feel as uncomfortable as me 😳😬😘

Happiful Mag -Overcome your fear of not being liked

As an aside, I must say here that I find fasting incredibly easy…. But when hubby is up super early and the smell of bacon wafts it’s way under your bedroom door…. A girl could be forgiven for falling off the fasting wagon.

Anyway, I think I’ll get up now and change the bed…. Put my time to better use. Be nice to have clean bed tonight.

I just went back to the top of the blog to add a title and call it “early morning feels” ……… then realised I can’t do that!!!!!! 😂😂😂

Oh haha a dog barked… they can smell the bacon too…. Right, I’m up!!!

The days seems so long when you get up that early.

It was The little gift shop’s 4th birthday today. I was the first ever customer when Gayle opened. I took a video when I walked into the shop. It looks soooo different today! She’s done so well and I’m so proud of her. She just goes after what she wants and does it. A great role model.

I had my Valentine’ Day sweatshirt on with a heart patterned scarf…. I’m not taking it off as I may never wear it again. It was only £5.99 and is not the best shape or quality.

So yeah, it’s 2.15pm and I’m in comfies on the couch between Freya and Bhruic. I’ve finished my 13 day stint of work and have 1.5 days off work. I’m not doing anything for the rest of the day.

And relax….

Have a great rest of weekend!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

3am again. Wide awake. I tried to back to sleep and reckon I was completely successful…. About 10 minutes before the arm went off…. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I got up for the Farm at 5am and felt so groggy and lethargic. Craig got the dogs up before I left….. look how tired they all look!!

Please don’t go…. Just throw the ball 🎾

Nope I’m gunna get it….

Bhruic looking super sleepy….

Just stop pointing the camera at me says Freya! She looks soooo p’d off 😂

Oh ok you can throw it now….

The workout was brilliant though, and it was lovely to see a couple of the girls I haven’t seen for ages. I am soooo sore now and can hardly walk!!

I came home at 7.30am and blitzed the housework. I was on a roll and knew, as soon as I sat down, that would be me…. So I kept on going.

Had to spend 20 minutes unblocking the hoover…. Realised that all I was doing was pushing dog hair around the house and it must be blocked. I had to take it apart! Then had to go back over everything once I unblocked it….. 😂 it feels great to have taken the worst off. There’s still loads that needs doing.

I got a message from a Gayle to say she was all ready for me at The little gift shop, with decaf coffee and oat milk!!! So nice of her.

I took sandwiches, for us both, for lunch and we had some lovely cake…. Forgot to take pics dammit… it was a Crunchie chocolate square. It was delish.

So Valentine’s Day is in full swing …. No men in to buy cards today but hopefully some tomorrow. We need to get more male customers! We don’t bite!

This is the shop window…. With very bad reflection.

Gayle is going to run a competition to win this amazing gift. My photos don’t do it justice!

Here’s a selection of cards and new Bomb Cosmetics. The shop smells lovely again today.

It was really good to be back and catch up on all the news and see all the new jewellery and smellies.

There was a big village funeral, today, for the lovely lady who died recently. I knew I wouldn’t be able to make it but it was lovely to see her daughter when I came home from work and give her a hug. She said her mum would have been pleased with how today went. I’m glad she had a lovely send off. ♥️

I’m not gonna lie… I am shattered now. I’m needing some time off after 12 days straight working and I’m really looking forward to a rest. Bearing in mind….. I crave alone time and silence and I have talked for 12 days. 😂 ironically talking is probably what I do best…. And I secretly love it but it will be nice to retreat into myself for a day and a half before it all starts again on Monday.

Chinese ordered as I can’t possibly cook (ok do I ever? It was my turn tonight and I just can’t….) candles lit… just need to change into my comfies and I’m done for the day!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️