So yeah…. This happened!! 1,000 days without an alcoholic drink since January 2019.…. Who’d a thunk it as my Gran would say! That saying always makes me smile.
By Dec 2018 I knew enough was enough and I thought I’d take a break and try Dry January 2019. That period between Christmas and New Year when you’ve had so much to eat and drink that you stand at the bar in the pub and just can’t think what you can force down your throat this time. Drinking Prosecco while really struggling to keep it down but hey it’s just what you do eh?!?
I wasn’t any worse than anyone else but I didn’t like how alcohol made me feel. I hated that “fear” the next morning….. there were unexplained bruises, hellish hangovers and awful cringeworthy moments. Any excuse to have a glass of wine in my hand. That ahhhhhhh moment that made everything seem all ok. It numbed the pain of a very stressful job with a horrific commute.
So I started on 2nd January 2019 and “celebrated”’my last hurrah on 1st Jan… as you do. I’ve slipped twice. The day the pubs announced they had to close on 20th March 2020. 443 days in I sunk a bottle of wine like it was the end of the world. It was disgusting, I hated even the sip at the start. It made me feel weird…. And on I drank. I couldn’t stop. I felt like hell the next day and beat myself up.
So I did it again on 15th July 2020. The pubs were re-opening (should say I live next door to a pub…) so I “celebrated” the re-opening. I didn’t want to be the odd one out. Again disgusting (and that’s not a criticism of the pub wine!) Same story as before. I carry those two days about with me as a cross to bear. Why is it I focus on them rather than the 998 when I used sheer bloody willpower and didn’t have a drink?!?! You knew I was hard work eh??!
So here I am… who’d a thunk it as my gran would say. 1000 days without alcohol. She who self medicated with it has gone it alone.
It’s been a very hard journey yet sitting here now it seems easy. I was so jealous of every minute I spent around drinkers. It was so hard. I felt left out. I had to decline drinks left, right and centre. But I did it. I am proud to be a non-drinker. I used to turn up my nose at non-drinkers. I never understood it and felt threatened by it. Not any more.
So my next count is I’m now 47 days without antidepressants and I’m pleased to say that today was so much better than yesterday. The non emotional, in control Julie turned up today.
Yesterday was awful and I didn’t sleep great either. I didn’t get up for the Farm this morning as I needed more rest. I feel so much calmer today. It’s such a relief after the drama I created yesterday.
So what’s the difference today?! Well….. this might be the craziest thing I’ve ever shared… but I have a crystal that helps balance my chakras. (Yeah I know, ok, bear with me….)
This crystal is programmed by a company called Lifetransformers. net….. now I know and I would have been reluctant before so I hear you rolling your eyes at this. 🤣
Well you can scoff if you like but all I can say is…. Popped the crystal into a wee bag and into my bra and it’s done the trick. Now you can just stop laughing. I will regret sharing this I’m sure 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️but I am night and day compared to yesterday. If a wee crystal in my undies changed that then let me have it. (That sounds so ridiculous…. I’m aware)
I’ve had this crystal for a while and it’s been helping so I left it at home. Forgot about it. Course I never mentioned it before as you’d think I was crazy…… suddenly thought about it this morning as my anxiety wasn’t great again first thing.
Boom. Job done. I’m hoping you focus on my 1,000 days and forget all about this.
So that’s all for today. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🥳
I’m off to meet the Crochet Hookers tonight then an early night again.
I want to say thanks so much to everyone for reading and supporting me. It means a lot.
Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️