I am so overwhelmed with the amazing birthday wishes that I received. I feel very blessed to have such a wonderful support.

I got loads of lovely cards and gifts yesterday too.

I went to the village pub for my Crochet Hookers group and Evelyn brought carrot cake! I had a small piece and it was sooooo good along with alcohol free Gordon’s gin and tonic.

Craig came home just after 8 and we had crispy duck pancakes from the Chinese. Not had that in so long and really enjoyed it though didn’t eat half what I would usually eat!

Craig did a healthy twist on birthday cake!

These are really lovely. They are obviously made without sugar but I’m finding my tastes have changed and anything too sugary seems like too much now and makes my teeth feel like they are bleeding sugar! who even am I now?!?! Only downside is that they all have a best before of 22nd November which is Monday…… whole lotta cake to be eaten by then. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😳🤣

I got a solar panel for Abbie the camper van which means we can be more off grid and don’t need to be on sites with electric hookup. we dropped her off at work for it to be fitted. He’d organised all of that. Not gonna lie I had all kinds of fear that we are far too busy to be bothering with my solar panel but it was all arranged.

We headed straight for lunch.

This is based at Fencefoot Farm in Fairlie on the west coast just south of Largs.

It’s a lovely wee place. They don’t serve alcohol so just water for us, which suits me. You can go to the Farm Shop and buy wine or beer and bring it in to the restaurant.

Starters were Cullen Skink and Scallops.

The scallops were on a puréed cauliflower with a curry sauce. It was exquisite!

Mains were poached Halibut with creamy samphire and mussel sauce over a bed of mash and pan seared fillet of cod with tumeric rice pilaff and a curried coconut sauce.

It was so lovely. Followed with a decaf latte.

I didn’t want the lunch to end. Yet I couldn’t eat anymore even if I tried.

We drove home over the Fairlie Moor road and stopped foe a few photos. It’s been dreadful weather all day but the sun shone through the clouds for a few minutes.

So we had the loveliest meal and I’ve been sitting in jammies ever since. Be rude not to.

So thanks again to everyone for making my birthday that but more special.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Jeez….. 49. That was fast.

I shouldn’t be scared of my age. I am so very grateful to have reached an age that so many have not. But I am a wee bit scared.

This last wee while I am so very aware that life is short and it’s meant to be lived every moment. Not slept through. …

Travelling is my passion. We talk about it a lot and we know there is a lot more to come.

We need to spend the rest of our lives appreciating every day and making it worthwhile.

So we’ve been awake since about 3am…. Yup. We were wide awake in time for the Fit Body Farm at 6am. I worked hard and upped my weights a bit again.

Off to work straight after for one last day before a few days off.

I got a call at the back of 9. Boss man calling me to Upholstery as “the place is a disaster” and “it’s the last thing he needed to walk into”….. 😳🤯🙊

Yay!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! 🥳🎂🎉🎊🥳

Thank god. Honestly I had the fear…. It’s still too soon 🤣🤣🤣

Wait till you see what they got me…

Check the 2nd row up…. That’s a special team of folk eh? They know I’m on my FBF challenge so got me pineapple in case I didn’t want a doughnut 🍩…. I had the one above the pineapple! 🤫🥳

The card is handmade too!! So special. Was really chuffed after I got over the relief at the shock. 😬🤣

I feel very blessed to have had so many messages today from so many lovely people.

I haven’t opened any cards or gifts yet as we’ve both been working today. Craig will be home at 8 and we have a half crispy duck coming!

I’m totally milking the gifts and cards and will hold off as long as I can to make it last 🤣🤣

I turn 49 at 9.36pm.

I’m 1,049 days alcohol free.

I’m 95 days anti-depressant free.

I’m one very lucky girl.

And now I’m off to hang out with my Crochet Hookers for a bit!

Stay safe everyone 🥳🥳🥳

Oh wow…. Well I can write today down as another learning curve in the life of learning curves.

I am so done with the curving. Guess I need to realise that it’s another life lesson.

So a very simple trigger. Last night I realised I hadn’t ordered a part that we’d been waiting on at work. I even stayed on last night to phone the supplier to chase it….. only to find out I hadn’t ordered it. 😳🤯

Now this is not the end of the world. It’s not great either but I told everyone last night and I didn’t get told to “pick a window” or “pick a door” as my “jaeckets on a shoogly peg” as may have been heard in the past.

I didn’t even write about it last night as I just chose to let it go. Or so I thought.

I wake up with a thumping head at 5am. I try to get back to sleep but I can’t. I use all the techniques. Focus on breathing… lasts all of 2 breaths… focus on my toes and try to do a body scan. Nope, can’t get up past my ankles before my mind is whirring again.

A whole lot of fear and feelings of being out of control.

So this morning I come into work and I am all over the place. I try really hard not to be. Try to pull myself together. Try to talk myself down out of the spiral 🌀.

It’s not working. There are tears. There is breathlessness. And most of all there is disappointment.

I am so proud of these last few weeks. So proud of the way I’ve handled the Fit Body Farm challenge on top of everything else. So proud of my calm approach to life.

The disappointment is that anxiety can still wallop me in the face when I least expect it and for no real apparent reason.

I felt like I had just drink 5 strong coffees in a row. Of course I hadn’t. Anxiety bubbles like caffeine.

It made me jittery, forgetful, made me say all the wrong words, call people by a completely different name. I just felt completely out of control.

Then I ramble… more than ever. Trying to do all my jobs at once. No coordination. Flitting from one thing to the next without a breath.

I suddenly feel calm early afternoon. I felt shattered and could have slept at my desk. The calm after that anxiety is an amazing feeling, such a relief.

I still struggle with this being ok. I know I need to accept it for what it is as I know it will be yesterday’s news in no time at all. I feel weak at the time. I still need validation from others that it’s ok. I can’t accept it myself yet. In turn I feel pathetic for seeking validation.

Just calm down….

Relax….

If only.

So in other lovely news I came home to early birthday flowers from Mum and Dad.

They made my day.

So I’ve had dinner (spaghetti bolognese) which I prepared yesterday. Check me. Makes life so much easier when you have food to come home to.

We’re watching Griff’s Great Australian Rail Trip on Netflix. He’s just travelled from Perth to Kalgoorlie. It’s a huge trip down memory lane as I traveled there in 2005 all by myself.

That’s another story and one I must tell one day as it was a very early indication that I liked writing when I sent emails home about my adventures. I’ve only just realised that.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I can hardly walk. 🤣🤣

Honestly my muscle ache my from the Fit Body Farm on Saturday have me walking like a cowboy when I can actually get moving. I’m having to hold onto something to try and get up and down from the loo 🚽 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤣

It’s sore but a great feeling as I know I’ve worked really hard.

Wide awake at 4am 😵‍💫 and back to the Farm again this morning by 5.38am for a weigh in….. yes we are slightly insane.

So I’ve lost 1.9% body fat so far which is great but I was a bit under-awed by that after all the effort I’ve put in… but hey… it’s a loss and I’ve measured 41cms lost which I guess is pretty huge and I’m really pleased with that.

So this morning there was a lot of running. My legs felt like logs but eventually kinda loosened off.

We ran for a minute then stopped for some exercises every minute for 10 minutes. Twice. Lots of running. It did make me smile watching people at random places in the dark stop and start some exercises. Like a strange game of musical statues but with moving statues!

So I’m tired tonight. It’s been a really busy day in Tartan HQ.

I had a list of things to do and hardly got to any of it. I certainly added to it!

Didn’t get my lunch until 2pm and almost had the shakes by the time I ate. It was just the way things worked out and doesn’t happen often.

I was a bit later leaving tonight too and it was already dark! That’s the start of it… will be like that now until the end of February. The nights are fair drawing in!

And finally a wee interesting thing I found today. 25 years ago Scotland’s Stone of Destiny was returned to Scotland having been moved from Scone Abbey to Westminster in London in 1296.

I remember the day it came home to Scotland and to Edinburgh Castle.

Cannot believe it was 25 years ago. 😳

Tomorrow is my last day being 48. 🙊🤯

Where does the time go?!? 😱

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

First of all… check the sky before we went to bed last night. Spooky!

The house lights and garden light really lit everything up.

Oooooh I’ve just had the best day. I have ticked so many things off my list and it feels good.

To be fair I got up about 6am to achieve it so you’d bloody hope I had something to show for it. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😬🤣

I woke at 5.15am… becoming a habit…. The sky was pink when it got light.

We had a very early morning coffee (still decaf!) and I got into the housework.

Living room, Kitchen, Sunroom, Bathroom and STAIRS…. All done by 9am. So there are still things on my list but that’s a huge weight off my mind. I hate seeing mess everywhere. It overwhelms my mind. Makes me question my worth almost. How ridiculous is that?!?

We live with 3 dogs. Our house is never going to be a palace. Some days I use that as excuse. Some days I’m disgusted at the mess they cause. Some days I just tidy it all up and I feel awfy damn proud of myself.

I met Claire at 10am for a big walk with the dogs. It’s been a long time since we did that. I feel I’ve not walked the dogs enough this last week though Craig has but it felt good to give them a long walk and get a good blether along the way.

We walked to Barmill and to Nosh where Claire bought us rolls and square sausage and coffee…. They had decaf! Love this pics as Claire just walked out the door!!

We headed into the Barmill Community Park to have our breakfast.

And then we walked back.

This tree was so autumnal looking. The trees around here are all very black bark so the leaves really show up.

So regular readers will know exactly what came next…. Well after hanging up washing blah blah blah… I went to bed, put the electric blanket on and had THE best nap. 2.45pm I woke up. Soooo good.

So another hour has passed writing this and it’s still only 4pm…. It’s been a great day.

This next one feels a bit negative for me to post but it’s actually pretty true. If you stay away from other peoples’ drama or expectations of you then life is so much more calm.

So I’m here now. Feet up in front of the fire.

I might get my crochet out… should do that actually… but most of all I’m relaxing. Should say here too that any form of movement is actually agony after yesterday’s Farm…. He upped the weights on our Sled Push 🛷 and I think everyone who did the workout says they can feel it! I have muscles on my muscles in my butt cheek and all the way down the backs of my legs. It’s pain free to sit still so I’m just gonna do that. 😬🤣

A funny to end with…..

Always, always, always B.

Have a great week everyone. Know your worth. Be kind to everyone you meet as you have no idea what their struggles may be. They may be trying to hold it all together and your kindness might just be the one thing that helps. We all have that power.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Hair appointment day for the first time in over a year! 💇🏻‍♀️

So let’s rewind… I finally feel a bit better so I decided to try the Fit Body Farm this morning. I was wide awake by 6.20am but to be fair I’d been in bed since the back of 9 last night.

FBF starts at 7.30am on a Saturday. Much more civilised.

What a beautiful morning. ☀️☀️☀️

A stunning sunrise🌅

The farm is so autumnal, it’s just beautiful. After last night’s storm there are fresh fallen green leaves in amongst the red and brown ones.

I have no photos as I was busy concentrating on trying to breathe. … while obviously in awe of the sun rising in the sky through the trees.

It was a tough workout this morning…. But really good. I worked hard. I struggled for breathe at times but I did it and I didn’t shirk any of it.

I was buzzing when I left.

I should say here that I do drive about looking all over the place for photo opportunities. I actually marvel at everything I see in nature just now. I know how crazy that sounds but I actually love it.

So straight home, 3 sips of coffee, quick shower and then across the road to my lovely neighbour for my hair appointment.

So this is it at the start.

Elaine has a beautiful wee dog and it’s so lovely to play with her when you get your hair done!

I’m so pleased with it. I never really make any effort these days. My hair normally does what it does but it feels really good to have it all tidied up.

I didn’t want to be stuck in the house for the rest of the day with lovely hair so I suggested we went out for a bite of lunch.

By this time it’s after 1pm and I’ve not eaten anything all day… so we went to Mocha Jaks which is the new coffee shop at the end of the road.

I had a Oat Milk Decaf Latte and and Veggie haggis, cheese and Sriracha panini. It tasted so good and I appreciated every single bite. Even the salt and vinegar crisps at the side of the plate were exquisite 😬🤣

We did NOT order cakes which is a healthy eating win…. Their cakes are amazing and out of this world! Just not today.

So my bouncy curls got a wee lunch out and a trip to the supermarket to buy dinner.

I’ve loads of things running through my head… things that need doing….. so I wrote a big list. I’m already kind of freaking out that there’s only one day left in the weekend…. Yet I’m not gonna do any of it. Not right now.

It’s been a busy week, I’ve felt rotten all week and now that I’m finally breathing more clearly, I am going to rest.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Ok I know…. Pure hunners of people work 5 days a week and hey… I have done for the rest of my life… just not so much now.

So boom, 5 day week done, anxiety still in check AND most of it done with a rotten, stinking cold.

I didn’t go to the Fit Body Farm this morning as I couldn’t breathe properly… and I felt totally wiped out. The coach says that if the cold is only in your nose rather then your chest then you can work out at a reduced level so I’m going to go tomorrow morning instead. I’m finally feeling a wee bit better. I have a working nostril at last!

So there’s not much else to report today. I’m sitting in jammies with my feet up in front of the fire. I’ve had dinner…. I’ve cooked every night this week even though I’ve felt rotten.

I’ve lost a few pounds this week on top of the inches. It feels good to be down a bit in weight.

Another early night for me, life in the fast lane but hey, just the way I like it. ♥️

Have a good weekend!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Our world turned upside down in the first few months of 2020. That was nothing compared to what our previous generations went through. All we had to do was stay at home and stay safe.

When we stop to think of the great wars we can’t ever imagine just how terrifying it all must have been. How out of control everything became for them. My grandparents didn’t talk about it much or maybe I didn’t ask or listen.

We have friends in the forces and their stories are beyond anything I can ever imagine. We don’t stop to think about the sacrifice people make in their lives so others can have a better life.

So today we remember.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I’m a wee sorry soul tonight. I’m so bunged up and wabbit.

I’ve had to phone in sick to my Crochet Hookers group tonight. Jammies are on and the heating is way up. I’ll be wrapped in a blanket shortly.

To be fair paracetamol really helps but I forgot to take it at lunchtime so I’m holding off until bedtime. My sinuses have a pulse of their own at the moment. My nose is running non stop. 🤧😷

So….. I did make it to the Fit Body Farm this morning and worked really hard. They were difficult exercises but I tried to up the weights again too. I was breathing way better than I am now.

It was a lovely morning when I left.

When I got to work I realised the heater wasn’t working. Now this would be the third heater that had broken in my 6 months there…. I should not be allowed a heater….

I started work, laptop is fine…. Went to hit the kettle on… nothing. I hadn’t broken the heater after all but something had tripped the fuse so all the electric sockets had gone off. My laptop must have been running on battery.

I had to sport a hat look. I laughed at this photo as the fan, we so desperately needed in the summer, is almost taunting me. We bought them on the last hot day of the year and have never needed them since 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤣

So a good day despite feeling rotten. Great buzz about the place. Loads happening. Love it.

I’ve noticed this next one a lot recently.

Situations that would usually have sent me reeling have not phased me and I’m proud of the way I’ve dealt with them. My anxiety has almost been non existent for the last few weeks which is great.

Long may that continue.

And this next one is the key to it all.

Once I finally stopped seeking everyone’s sympathy for being so busy, so stressed, up at 5.30am (oooh bliss now..) home at 7pm, no time, no time, no time…. I suddenly realise how many more hours there are in every day. And appreciate every one of them.

I’m off to eat a hearty stew for dinner and coorie in for the night.

Paracetamol then bed and out for the count, I hope!

Stay safe everyone 🤧🤧🤧

I woke up to go to the loo…. It was 1.43am. I couldn’t believe it. I honestly thought it was time to get up. Now normally you’d go back to bed with a great feeling that there were still hours to the alarm…. Not so much!

I couldn’t breathe through my nose. I couldn’t get comfy. I got up to the loo again at 2.32am. Jeez…. I took some paracetamol and within about 10 minutes I could actually breathe better. I tossed and turned all night but when the alarm went off I was breathing my best breath and out for the count. Of course I was!

I’ve felt really tired and fuzzy headed but other than that it’s been a good day. Things keep jumping in my head to do and falling straight back out again 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤣.

I need to make a list when I go in first thing tomorrow to try and stop myself forgetting things. 😳😬

The weather turned out lovely today after initial rain. I had the heater on full blast this morning and then had to open doors for fresh air as the sun on the portacabin gave me a bright red face! One minute I’m freezing and the next, roasting.

I chased the sunset again tonight as I left work but pretty much missed it.

There was a huge orange ball in the sky when I left work…

I had no idea how close Tartan HQ was to Troon….. I honestly thought Troon was way further south but I headed towards the sun and hit Troon. Who knew?!?

It would have been amazing to watch that huge ball of red set into the sea. It’s still pretty choppy out there too.

Then off to Dalry as I had kinesiology with Shelagh at 6.45. For the first time in ages I went in calm and was almost balanced.

Not quite. It’s a session of calm and tranquility. I honestly cannot recommend it highly enough.

So tonight I’m chasing the Aurora borealis! There was an orange alert to say there is a Lillie hood of it being viewed in the UK.

Now bearing in mind I’m in the middle of a light polluted street and it’s a wee bit cloudy so my chances of seeing it are slim! I took some photos anyway and imagine I can see some green light. Though most probably not 🤣🤣

It’s still a nice picture.

So I’m toying with the idea of bed or Aurora…. That saying “you can sleep when you’re dead” is ringing in my ears but I am soooooo tired.

I’m working 5 days this week…. So I can have next Thursday off as Craig has taken holidays. You’d honestly think I was so hard done to having to work the same length of time that most people do. I hear myself. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😬🤣

Bed it is…. At 8.18pm 🥱😴💤🛌♥️

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Boy did it rain today!! The Tartan HQ portacabin makes it sound way worse than it is… and it was pretty bad. 🌧🌧🌧

We were so lucky to get the Fit Body Farm in the dry today. It was a good session, I upped some weights and put extra effort in. It was made even better by a lovely girl commenting that I looked great and have I lost weight?

I haven’t lost any weight yet but I have lost a total of 29cms from various body parts 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤣 in the first two weeks of the Fit Body 6 week challenge. That was so lovely of her to say.

So I’m spurred on by that!

I want to talk a bit about this next one…. CONFORMITY… that is something I have always done.

Conform to what I am told to do even when my gut said it didn’t feel right. Teachers pet. 😬 when you work for a company you need to conform to a certain extent but not to compromise all of your morals. I should say here that this was me in my old life. Not now. I am able to see the difficulties I had by conforming all of the time. Especially managing a large team of people and not managing them in the way I wanted to but in the way I was told to do. Life is a huge learning curve and I had to hit the depths of despair before I could really see the importance of this.

So it’s been a quick day at work today. Over in a flash. Which is great because I am knackered!

Had to go to the supermarket on the way home as we didn’t have much fresh food for this new healthy eating lifestyle. Why is it a real pain when you have to go somewhere on the way home from work?!? But anyway, it’s done. The fridge is stocked and I’ve got to make breakfast and lunch for tomorrow… and then, I will be going straight to bed!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I could not wake up again this morning. Out for the count. That dead to the world sleep that I have to drag myself to wake up from. Just like last Sunday.

My throat was sore but it’s better when I get up.

So I go slow. Very slow. Mostly on stop to be honest. I have a bite to eat and lie back down on the couch for a wee while.

I didn’t go back to sleep but I really could have.

A shower helped wake me up. I can kind of think straight now.

So now we’re off to see mum and dad for the time in ages. It was dad’s birthday on 28th September and we’ve not seen him since then… to be fair we’ve both had holidays in that time but still.

The last few years have taken away my control over organising birthday cards and presents for people. I no longer believe that I can buy anything for people. I no longer believe I know what they would like or want.

I used to love other people’s birthdays. That’s something I need to work at to get back. I love giving people gifts and watching them open them.

All that aside we were super organised for dad this year. Of course we were. We went to Islay. We went to the Laphroaig distillery.

We passed the the Poppy Pyramids at Bathgate.

Hard to get a decent photo at 70mph but I tried! Three 30ft giant poppies appear ever year to remember those lost in the world wars.

---

I did not know that until I looked it up. Wow. I always thought it was a local farmer… sometimes the sheep on these pyramids are multicoloured!

So it’s 8.36pm and we’re just home. We’ve had a lovely day! Dad got his birthday present finally!! Think he liked it…

We had a lovely lunch with mum and dad and then my brother and sis in law popped in with my nephew. We’ve not seen them all together in so long. We really must do it more often! Covid aside!

My nephew loves the dogs… they had great fun playing football outside. They settled down for a wee cuddle on the floor and they were both almost asleep!

They dogs were out of the count on the way home!

We got stuck in traffic on the wayhome due to an accident. I made Craig take a photo of the traffic!!

It only added about 20 mins on to our journey to be fair but that’s a whole lot of traffic for a Sunday night.

So, a great weekend. Just made breakfast and lunch for tomorrow. Another week of early starts but a healthy lifestyle.

Check me. Who’d a thunk it?!?

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Wow what a day. I don’t remember it being this windy for a good while. I don’t even know if this storm has a name? Most strong breaths of air do at the moment. It’s bad enough that it should have a name.

I’m still not feeling great but it’s still only at the funny throat stage so I’ll take that.

I’ve been in comfies most of the day but I’ve done loads of housework. Washing, hoovered, cleaned, dusted and watched with one eye out the window at the horror of the weather! We couldn’t even have the doors open for the dogs as the rain was pouring in the back door. We had lights on all morning as it was so dark.

And then… a chink of sunshine in the gloom… so I got my walking gear on and headed out with the dogs.

Now do not let these sunny pics fool you. It was almost so windy at times it was blowing me sideways. Me. Now I might be down a cm or two body dimensions wise, but I’m still not the size that gets blown sideways!

All through this I can hardly hold the phone steady to take pics… bearing in mind I have 3 dogs in the other hand… that are desperate to get up to the field for a run about.

Now I could see that the field we were heading to had sheep on it. They shouldn’t be there as it’s a field without fences but they keep escaping and ending up here. Means I can’t let the dogs off the lead… dammit.

So I decided to walk up the bottom of the field and up the left to try and push them back to the field on the right. The wind was raging so they couldn’t hear us coming. I tried to whistle at them, I tried to bark… yep I barked at sheep. All the way up there in the field.

Nothing. They didn’t look up.

I got closer. Dogs still on the lead. I’m still trying to left flank them.

Then 3 cows in the next field catch wind of us. They start running down to the bottom corner of the field the sheep should be in. It’s almost as if they are trying to tell the sheep we are coming. They are running kicking their rear hooves up in the air.

Finally one looks up…. At the cows. Then two, three, four…. And they start to move towards the correct field. And then something makes them turn around towards us. Maybe a cow tells them we are there?! We have been 🐑 spotted…. And they start to move.

Toward us…….. 😱

Now I know sheep are not the cleverest of animals but what sheep walks towards someone with 3 Border Collies?!?!

So now they think I’m a farmer?? 👩🏻‍🌾

I know… I need to get out more. 🤣

I mildly panic and turn round and walk back in the opposite direction…. Pretty sharpish like…. And thankfully the silly sheep do the same and all run back in to their field! Just like that…. Like sheep 🐑

Now bear in mind through all of this, it’s still blawin’ a hoolie.

Now this next pic is to let you see that the grass was blowing in the wind. It isn’t doing it justice…. The wind was actually tracking all the way along the ground.

Heading back down the road in the sunshine… and met this wee guy!

So the moral of my story today is that even when the weather is horrific there is still beauty to be found and I still wandered round like a kid in a sweetie shop trying to get the best photos. Yeah… I know.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Jeez I am knackered today. Now to be fair I woke at 4am…. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😬🤣

I was in bed for 9pm last night and missed the Aurora again but I have a real lethargy at the moment. It’s been a good week but I am tired. I’m dragging myself about the house with no energy so I figured I’ll come to bed and reset.

My throat still isn’t great and I’m coughing a bit now but I don’t feel ill with the cold, just tired.

Now all of that said… I have been to the Fit Body farm and done the following this morning…..

• Run 7 laps of the farm (8 laps was 2km)
• 250m on the rowing machine
• 250m on the ski-erg
• 20 + burpee broad jumps
• 20 + walking lunges with 20kg weight
• 3 sets of sprints
• Farmers carry with 32kg (I think) for 8 x the distance
• 25 wall ball target throws
• Sled push and pull with heavy weights this morning

All before 7am. 😳

Craig did really well and managed the full 2km run in the time but I struggled for breath this morning and ended up one lap short. On reflection I’d probably have been about 4 laps short when I first started this!

Earlier on in the week I was buzzing with the exercise but not so much today. I’m buzzing with the electric blanket on and the thought of a nap 😴

I took the gruesome threesome out when I got back from the Farm.

It was a very autumnal walk!

Ooooh it’s 2.21pm and I just woke up to the bark of barks as Craig came back from work. So much excitement and all I can muster is a wee noise to say hello!

That was a good nap!

So we popped into the village pub next door and had the healthiest options on the menu. Salt and chilli chicken strips to start and Salmon in lemon and parsley 🍋 🌿 butter for mains.

So we sat in there until about 6pm. I had a Tanquery 0% gin with Pink Soda and a Gordon’s 0%. I moved on to the pink sofa on its own as I’ve drank them dry of 0% over the last few months. 😂😂

One of the guys set off a quick firework display behind the pub and I ran in to make sure the dogs were ok… thankfully they were fine. Not bothered in the slightest.

So I should explain for international readers where our Guy Fawkes Day, affectionately known as Bonfire Night comes from.

Given the UK’s current political disaster at the moment I’ve seen the following which made me smile and cringe in equal measure. Just a bit of tongue in cheek…. 🤔😌

So a good day with lots of rest. Still got a deep raspy voice but that’s all for now.

Stay safe everyone 🎆🎇🎆

Wide awake at 5am on the morning of my lie in….. ok only until 6.30am, but still. Please don’t let this be my new body clock?!? 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😬🤣 My throat feels like I’m swallowing razor blades. My poor mum has “dot the told” as we call it and I think I might getting it too.

It was super frosty this morning… and no I didn’t think to use my windshield cover. I had to scrape the tiny bits of the windscreen that I can actually reach, which is not much to be honest. Then sit and wait for it to defrost. That’s the longest wait ever. I need to up my frosty morning routine. 😆😆

It was a beautiful sky. I took some photos while the windscreen did its thing!

I am gutted that I missed the Aurora last night. It was visible all over the UK and I was fast asleep in my bed so I’m making up for it with sunrises and sunsets 🤣🤣.

So it’s was a busy day today. I never got a minute to do anything I had planned to do but I still got loadsa for other things done.

I moved the heater right behind my desk but still had very cold feet 🤦🏻‍♀️🤣🤣

The sky was stunning when I left work. I was late getting away and it was already setting.

This is sunset over an industrial estate.

So I decided to rush to the coast on the way home. It’s only 10 minutes out my way.

Those 10 minutes were enough to lose it all!

Still they are lovely nonetheless.

It was dark by the time I got home, but my dinner was in the oven and the house was toasty…. Craig was home before me for the first time in ages!

The Aurora is a strong possibility tonight. I’m keeping an eye on the alert apps so who knows… I might see it tonight. Or….. I might be in the land of raspy throat zzzzz’s.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

What a lovely day! It was dark when I woke up at ridiculous o’clock.

The Fit Body Farm was great again today. One team had targets to achieve on the assault bike, the rower and the ski-erg while the other team shot baskets to see who could score the highest. Love shooting baskets. Kept thinking… “it’s not even 7am” 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤣

It was light when I came out and a lovely sunrise.

So every morning I leave the gym I give Craig a call just for a quick chat about the class and the plan for his day. Not today…

Today I drove along in a dream in awe at the sunrise. Everywhere I looked the sky was stunning. Some clouds were pink. I said hello to the lovely white horse I drive by everytime I leave the Farm…. Ok stay with me… I know… 🤦🏻‍♀️😬🤣

I actually stopped outside a lovely wee row of cottages and took a pic of the sunrise.

The photos don’t do it justice. It was just so calm and peaceful and a reminder of a new day. (feel free to be sick!)

Tartan HQ was fur-eeeeeezing this morning and I just couldn’t get a heat. There’s a perfectly good heater but I just couldn’t heat up at all.

Then I found a van with the diesel heater on. I moved in!!

I had the best wee morning. I got loads done. I felt in control. I cleared loads of work. I was in full concentration. AND I was sitting in positively tropical heat!!!

In that photo my cheeks have turned red as I’m now starting to heat up…. Quite considerably! I had to keep opening the door to cool down. So I moved back into the office at lunch time. Really loved my temporary office!

Home and out with the pups just after sunset which is now super early!

I took Calaidh out first and then back for Bhruic and Freya. It’s getting pretty dark for walking them after work so will have to rethink my black walking gear 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😬🤣

This sky is pink again.

The sky was stunning again… and we’re finally back to spooky trees!

By the time I got back home it was pretty dark.

I made a lovely steak mince Chilli for dinner tonight. It was lovely.

So I’m pretty chuffed with my progress this week. I’m tired but so would anyone be getting up at 5am 3 days a week. I’m happy, calm and even under pressure, not losing it. (LADIES ONLY…I’m especially proud as it’s time of the month and I’m usually a tearful quivering wreck. I’ve always said the first day is the one day of the month that I shouldn’t be in work… not this time… and honestly I can’t remember the last time I didn’t fall apart on the first day.)

So anti-depressant free for 81 days now. Caffeine free for just over 3 weeks. Alcohol free for so many days I’ve lost count but only 7 weeks off 3 years. Into the second week of cooking fresh, healthy meals…. Which is never have believed.

Who’d a thunk it eh?!?! 💜💜💜

Off to meet the Hookers now and get some crochet done… and I’m late!!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I woke at 4.18am…. No way… the mind started whirring and I got up for the loo and went back to bed determined to sleep…. And I did eventually. Fell back to sleep but woke up with the alarm at 6.30am feeling as groggy as….. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

We’ve a new start in Tartan HQ so I thought I can’t be late in today… I am NEVER late…. But of course the minute I thought that, everything transpired to make me late. I had to prep my breakfast and lunch after my shower and it just didn’t go smoothly. It was 7.28am when I finally left the house… only to find that Abbie the camper was suitably fogged up inside and it took me ages to clear the windscreen. Even when I drove off I realised I should stop as the visibility wasn’t great. Then… the fuel light came on. Sat nav said I’d be at work by 7.58am…. No way I was stopping for diesel.

So all that said. It’s been a good day at Tartan HQ.

We got the vans that we have for sale all lined up out the front with for sale signs on them.

From left to right we have Boxer, Archie, Lotty, Caddy and Angus! 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

I got home from work (after going for fuel….) and swept out the van, tidied the bedroom, put washing away, tidied the kitchen, filled the dishwasher… made chicken pizza… again, need to get a new meal!! All very productive… check me.

Still eating healthily, still prepping in advance. I’m enjoying the food… I have times where it annoys me that I have to. But I keep doing it.

So I have now hit the wall. Knackered…. It’s 7.47pm, I’ve just finished dinner and I’m ready for bed!!

Life in the fast lane eh?!?

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Wow I can’t believe it’s November already… I’m sure loads of us are still wondering what happened to 2020?!?

So yeah it was still dark for the Fit Body Farm at 6am but it was light by the time I came out today. No need to the head torch.

The Farm was great again today and I was buzzing after the workout. I was struggling with some of the exercises and really tried to dig deep to get through them.

Gavin turned he music up on the last session and it was a great workout best. I speeded up and worked even harder. Finished with a huge grin!

So I have to say I am loving this challenge. I have honestly had to avoid cake at work every day since last Monday…. I am almost a saint. 😇

Work was busy and I had to rush back up the road waiting on the chimney sweep who’s due between 4-6. It’s now 6.03pm and no sign. Slightly pee’d off as I could have walked the dogs on that time but instead I a cuppa and a chat with Claire which is always a welcome distraction!!!

And just like that it’s time for bed!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

I love it when the clocks go back. We gain an extra hour of the weekend….. yet…. I didn’t see it at all as I slept right through it! Which basically means I’ve slept for HOURS…. 💤💤💤

I was in one of those “dead to the world” type sleeps. Nothing in my head. It was such a deep sleep. Sooo good!

I opened my eyes at 8.49am. Boom. Awake. Up!

It’s also Halloween 🎃

So I’m having a really great weekend. I am chill, I am calm and I’m relaxed. I’ve not thought about work at all which is unheard of for at least the last month or so.

I’m not beating myself up about my list of chores. They are not walloping me in the face every 5 minutes. If I choose do something off my list then I do it and it feels good to mentally tick it off. It also feels just as good not to do the things on the list.

I’m super tired but I think it’s mostly the exhaustion of all the overthinking from the last month. It’s all part of the recovery.

We did the food shopping first thing this morning. Got loads of healthy food. What has actually happened to me?!? If you told me I’d be eating lettuce wraps and actually enjoying every bite I’d have laughed in your face 😂😂

I have already prepared my lunch for tomorrow already…….

😳

😬

Then I took the dogs out. It was torrential rain so I put what I called my wet clothes on. Craig did ask why I wouldn’t put dry clothes on and to be fair, he had a point. 🤣😂🤣

So it’s still only 1.30pm. How is it the extra hour feels sooooo much longer than just an hour?! This is the best day of the year.

I’ve had a lovely afternoon. I’ve pottered, hoovered, done washing, had a mini snooze. I’m really tired but can’t sleep with the smell of the pork joint we have cooking for pulled pork. I’ve just opened my eyes and it’s 17.20 and it’s dark.

Acht the nights are fair drawin’ in now.

Yup… the c-word…. It’s comin’ next but I’m gonna try and continue enjoying the present moment.

As that’s where true happiness lies.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Well…. I actually had a great time at the village pub Halloween party last night. What a great bunch of folk, amazing costumes. A real live band and dancing… lots of dancing!

Now Craig has the curliest hair ever in the history of curly hair and he decides he wants it straight for his costume…. Rolls eyes…. But actually it’s really fun trying to straighten it. I blow dried it straight and then used my straighteners for the first time in about 4 years… not quite but almost!

Of course it spent the night getting shorter as the curl frizzed up in it but hey it looked really different to his usual “do”.

So yeah, I had moments of insecurity. Nerves walking in dressed up but not dressed up enough for a major Halloween costume. I don’t join in on the games they play but on whole I relaxed and enjoyed it.

Our neighbours are so lovely and I got so many lovely comments on the blog. ♥️ thanks to everyone who reads this as it means a lot.

At 9pm the band came on… now this is a small village pub and honestly I could feel my face vibrating with the sound. It was very loud, so loud we had to scream to speak to anyone and I’ve spent most of today croaking or squeaking! But I reckon the band was a turning point for me…. When they played something I knew the desire to boogie was overwhelming…. Even sober amongst everyone else drinking. So I danced!

The band usually play Deacon Blue’s Dignity at the end of the night and in years gone by it’s been a sit on the bar and sing….. so I decided to get up there again this year. Why not?! All sober. And I loved it!!

Home and bed with a wee smile on my face.

So I’ve not got out of my jammies today at all. Well I did…. about 4.30pm (so that was a lie!) but into leggings and a sweatshirt so not much change.

We’ve had a lazy morning with a flurry of afternoon activity clearing out kitchen cupboards, writing a shopping list and making Breakfast Bars from thenFit Body Farm cook book. They are lovely but cut into squares rather than bars as a wee snack!

I mean honestly… me baking?!? There are loads of things I “should” have done today but getting the kitchen in order is a huge help to the Fit Body Farm healthy eating challenge. All the tubs have lids and everything is where it’s meant to be rather than all over the place as it was last week.

A fresh start to week 2!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️