Day 1676 a surprise 5k before work on a Monday, I’ll be thinking it’s Wednesday all day!

Lynsey messaged our Running group chat last night to see if anyone fancied a quick run this morning. I said yes straight away.

I don’t particularly enjoy it but I feel so great once it is done.

It’s hard to get out of bed and I’m sure I was awake for hours this morning, waiting for the alarm.

We meet right outside my front door. I can’t not go… it is literally handed to me on a plate.

We finish at my front door…. I mean sometimes we run further to Claire’s front door, but that’s hardly a reason not to go is it?

The universe has handed me this lovely group of girls that run from MY house!! What are the chances of that?!?

When I was off sick with my depression and the doc changed my meds… I could hardly put one foot in front of the other to walk the dogs. Every step was an effort.

My weight loss has been very gradual. Over years.

The first is me in 2021, the second is June 2023 and the last one was Sunday (Nov 2024)

The weight piled on in my depression. The only thing that made me happy was Cadbury’s chocolate buttons. 😆 I ate a lot of them.

I haven’t noticed the weight come off since last year but I can really see it there. Wow.

When things were bad I had no idea they could get better again. I was determined to work at it though and I don’t think it’s always an easy life to live. The harder I work at the things that make me feel better, the more peace I have.

I also have to live by all my rules… particularly the one about all the bad things being done early morning before I have time to think about them. I barely remember our run this morning, it was like someone else did it!

AND I got a 5k PB AGAIN, along with a 2 mile PB so I was really chuffed.

I found it hard today. It was colder, then roasting hot, then my legs felt like elastic bands with too much tension, then my breathing was all over the place.

But… I am so proud of myself for getting out of bed and doing it.

I needed to be ready mentally. I was ready to take the next step.

Never compare yourself to others. We have all lived completely different lives and are at different points in our lives.

I’d have looked at the running me and thought it wasn’t possible. I actually did. I was so envious of the girls who ran and seemed to be able to eat what they wanted and not put on weight. I truly believe you have to be there mentally to be able to do it. For it to be the next step.

My way, I’m rambling…

It was a lovely drive into work this morning on Remembrance Day 2024. The sky was so red… I had to stop to take photos.

Lest we forget.

It was also a lovely sunset tonight though I didn’t catch as much of it as wanted.

I went to the charity shop to drop off 4 big black bags and they couldn’t accept them as they are too full.

By the time I got home, it was still pretty.

As the sun sets on our day. may we remember all who have fought for us to give us the freedom that we have now. I can’t imagine what that was like. So many senseless deaths and it still happens in war today.

We will remember them.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1565 a 7k run before 7am on a beautiful morning!

First of all I captured a photo of a sun dog last night…. Who knew that was a thing?!?

I saw a few people posting photos of it on FB on the Aurora pages and someone said it was a sun dog. I sent them my photo and it was confirmed! I felt right proud of myself!

There was a lovely sunset last night too.

Then a beautiful start to the day. I woke at 5.20am and the alarm was due to go off at 5.30. I was meeting Lynsey for a run this morning.

It was only 4°C and felt really cold outside. The sky was beautiful.

It’s getting darker in the mornings already… the Village Hall looks lovely in the light.

We set off at 5.45am and could really feel the cold. A cyclist shouted behind us to warn us and then gave us the fright of our lives… 😆 that was us awake!

The sun rose as we ran and thankfully it got warmer… as it always does 😆

Look at the light as we ran into Spier’s Old School Grounds! It was so beautiful. It’s usually really dark in here due to the amount of overgrown trees.

My favourite gate.

I maybe should have lightened these ones up as they are very dark. I love the simplicity of this next one.

Bearing in mind these are all just point and press as we stop for a second while we are running.

And we’re done. I was a sweaty mess!! My glasses are steaming up!

I think this is my fastest pace so far. Strava doesn’t say that but I don’t think I’ve seen 7.09/km before? I think 7.27/km has been the fastest so far?

It’s 6.45am!

I went into a freezing cold shower for a few minutes to calm down! I love that feeling after a very hot run.

I love that we get to do all this before most people are awake. It’s a special time of the day for me.

The 10k we are signed up for on 21st August is in the evening…. I don’t know how I will ever stay awake or be motivated to run in the evening. I’m definitely a morning person!

It put me in good stead for the rest of the day.

My running has improved so much over the last 3 months. I’m really proud of my consistency… even thought some runs have been really hard. They have all taught me something. I’m so grateful to the girls for allowing me to run with them. It feels like we’ve got a lovely group.

Work has been good again today. We were really busy with lots of customers…. And it was quite hot. The weather has been lovely.

My friend Isy sent me this…

Wow that blew me away. It’s so very true. I am impatient.

Yes ♥️ Yes ♥️ Yes ♥️

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1396 a slightly better day ☀️

I’m so grateful to be sleeping despite all this anxiety. Another good night.

I had a really lovely evening it myself last night and even drank a WHOLE bottle of alcohol free Rosé! Decadent huh?! It was super chill and relaxed. It helped my head.

I woke feeling brighter this morning, a sliver of hope that the worst may have passed. I spend a bit of time on my phone looking for positivity and I got hit between the eyes with it…. Here are a few to share.

I hear ya…

If there’s no joy then time is covering up the present moment. That’s exactly what I’m doing just now, I’m panicking about time passing me by… not focussing on the moment st hand.

All I am focussing on are the problems, I can’t see beyond them to the possibilities but I can see that today….

And this…… this will be the year.

I had an ok day today. The sun shone outside and it was cold but lovely. I came home and walked Calaidh and Freya… it was a lovely end to the day… I chatted to mum.

then… I made dinner… another Green Chef vegan delivery… mushroom “shepherds” pie.

It was really super tasty.

So it’s late before I sit down but I’ve emptied and refilled the dishwasher too. It’s the first time I’ve felt like doing anything in the evening and it feels good.

Just one step at a time.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1382 an antsy day with a stunning windswept sunset!

I slept like a log last night but woke in a complete lather of perspiration…. Us ladies perspire obviously…. Oh come on I was sweating buckets 😂😂 the sheets were soaking again but at least I hadn’t realised and it didn’t keep me awake.

I’ve been antsy and irritable all day today. Completely self inflicted and all in my own head. I didn’t really relax. I wasn’t in the present moment. I was focussed on anything but the present moment.

I knew I had to fix it so headed down to the sea for sunset. It’s been a beautiful day today, albeit, really cold. The sun has shone for the first time in a while. It was lovely to see.

The sunset was spectacular… hereby follows a million photos of the setting sun, but to set the picture….. I was FREEZING… completely under dressed for the weather. Check this….

😂😂 I was being slapped in the face by the sand…. It was really quite sore on my freezing cold face. The phone was covered in sand which didn’t seem great so I didn’t stay too long. But it was so beautiful!!

It was so windy it was difficult to keep the phone straight…. Hence some wonky photos 😂😂

The birds were floating about on the thermals… it was lovely to watch. They kept sweeping on by.

A lovely sky…. And it did the trick.

Back home and the house was sooooo cold but definitely warmer than the beach!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1381 a bright and busy Monday

I didn’t sleep well last night. I had night sweats and woke at 2.35 with a thumping head and soaking wet sheets. I’m very lucky that doesn’t happen to me often.

My 2.40am hunt for paracetamol was fruitless… I was sure they were in my handbag… but no, couldn’t find them. I should say here I have THE tiniest handbag…. The paracetamol were all present and correct when I checked the handbag at 7.15am before work… of course they were. 😆

I woke again at 4.30 and just before 6… too hot so out from under the downie, then freezing. The joys.

Thankfully the headache didn’t return…

Also Bhru had been quite badly sick after yesterday’s blog so I was pleased to see she had been fine overnight.

As I lay in bed I searched for that rotten feeling so I could be justified in staying off sick. I couldn’t face work. I hadn’t slept, I’d be shattered, I’d be grouchy, my head hurt, did I have stomach cramps…. Etc….

I gave myself a shake, got out of bed at the alarm and have been absolutely fine all day. Neither up nor down. If anything I’ve been good…. Check my reluctance at admitting to that.

Our ego is a funny thing. It wants to wallow in the sadness, the injustice of things but actually I seem to be able to see it now and shut her up. I’m smiling at that. It’s good to smile after the last few days.

A lovely sky tonight.

I’ve made us a nice dinner and I feel like I’m being watched….

So yeah, a good day. Love may that continue.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1375 just the weather again…. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 and some self reflection 🥰

Well it must have been calmer last night as “Julie with ear plugs” was out for the count…. In my actual bed. Check me.

What a great rejuvenating sleep. I felt so refreshed! (as I read that back it sounds like I woke up 20 years younger which was absolutely NOT the case 😂😂 )

Storm Jocelyn has been picking up throughout day.

It’s rained ALL day and the wind has been gusting on and off all afternoon but she really hits tonight.

The Tartan portacabin has been buffeted about… I said thank goodness I was there for the ballast 😂😂😂

I was really lucky that the last deluge stopped about 5 minutes before I left work so my drive home wasn’t massively different from normal. Except for the tree down at the top of the road. This is not my photo so credit to Edward McWilliams.

Our house is literally just around that bend. I had to take the detour on the back roads and had a van follow me as he didn’t know where to go.

We have lost the top of our wood shed unfortunately. It’s done well mind you. It’s an old bus windscreen box from my old job.

The sky was stunning when I got home.

So once again I’ve watched myself have better reactions to previous triggers. When we try to finish a van there are always last minute parts required, for a variety of reasons.

My thought process was always as follows: immediate panic, defensive, high pitched whiny voice, why do you need that, why didn’t I know about it, did I buy the wrong thing, I’m sure I had that in stock, where do ok I get it, I’ve never bought one of them before, how do I even know where to look, how come we need it when I’ve never bought it before, will it get here in time, tears, panic, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety. You usually have to peel me off the ceiling when this happens.

The last time this happened I skyrocketed and came back down to earth pretty quickly, having seen my over-reaction from the outside looking in if that makes sense?

Today….

No problem.

Look part up.

Send screenshot… does this look ok?

Buy it.

Add to list of parts to buy in future.

Smile to myself.

That….. is how it should be done.

When you live with anxiety, you don’t just calmly stop and think. You catapult into the anxious oblivion.

Today I calmly thought and acted. No drama.

I love that I’m so aware of it too.

So that’s us both home safe tonight and hopefully by tomorrow the storm is over.

Hope you’re all safe and warm.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1369 a mindful trip to the sea 🌅🌊

I’m finding the blog a chore when I don’t feel 100%.

I’m fairly certain I’m not sick, but I’m creating some kind of weird tension in my body because I’m unsettled, out of balance.

I’ve learned to be very in tune with how I feel. I guess I overanalyse everything too.

I’ve had a headache for 3 days now and nothing is taking it away. Even typing that is giving it power over me. I’ve been telling anyone who will listen. I’m making such a big drama out of something that’s actually nothing.

All because I feel a bit low.

At lunch I saw this:

I read this over and over and felt the headache ease off. I realised that my jaw was clenched as it slowly started to relax, my shoulders relaxed down from my ears.

Is it that simple? Am I creating it all? And I think the answer is yes.

I’ve had an amazing January so far… I wanted to keep my head up the whole month and for some reason it’s slumped a bit. I feel restless, antsy, looking for direction. My mind screams that life is short and I should travel, travel, travel….. 🙄😆

So I went to the sea and it helped a bit because it was beautiful. I couldn’t stay long as it was bitterly cold and I didn’t have the warmest gear on.

The sky was absolutely stunning.

Spot the tanker perfectly positioned on the horizon. If I’d got away from work bang on time he’d have been right in front of the setting sun.

I suddenly noticed a squall moving down the Isle of Arran.

It was really dramatic. I took loads of photos but I think these were some of the best.

I’ve also never walked on frosty sand before. It was hard going as it was quite solid and we expect sand to give way when we walk over it. Very pretty though.

So I’ve given myself a shake, a dust down. Blew some cobwebs away at the beach and have blurted it all out.

We can’t always feel on top of our game.

Life isn’t always perfect and doesn’t always go our way.

We can set off with the best of interiors and have a million things disrupt our path.

The key is how we respond and I hope I’m back on track with that.

And this…… oh yes, this. Way too much drama being created this week.

And relax.

And go meet the crochet hookers!!

I’ve 4 minutes to get changed, pick up my crochet and head into the pub next door.

Stay safe everyone 🧶🧶🧶

Day 1367 back to reality!

Oh I don’t know where to put myself tonight…. My head has been sore since after lunch. It feels like a tension headache. My jaw is tight too.

I actually felt fine this morning, slept ok so no excuse there.

It was soooo frozen this morning I couldn’t get into the car!

Claire had been super lovely and scraped my car for me this morning as a wee Monday surprise! how kind…. But by the time I got out I still couldn’t get into the doors. The Beetle has those coupé style windows that drop down as you unlock the door… in the ice there’s no dropping down, hence door not opening.

I finally managed to get into the passenger door and climbed over to get the engine started. It all defrosted in the end but the windows sat kind of open all the way to work. It’s a real flaw.

I got on fine today, felt fine but mid afternoon I lost all focus, I kept having to look things up two and three times.

So… I could just be tired after all the excitement of the last few days!

I really wanted to go for a run after work to try and clear my head but it’s freezing. It’s that bitterly cold that takes your breath away a bit. Tomorrow we have snow forecast!

Probably means we’ll get none but I brought my laptop home just in case. Us anxious folks are always prepared for every eventuality. 😆

There was a lovely sky as the sun set.

Pic doesn’t do it justice. It was almost pink and grey striped, like wallpaper I had as a wee girl.

So yeah, I’m missing my “Heidi the Mountain Goat” tourist attitude of the last few days. Meanwhile I have this sleeping beauty next to me. She looks a bit like a kangaroo!

I am considering a super early night tonight.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1361 normal service of day numbering has been resumed 😆

So yesterday I randomly called the blog day 1400 because of course that follows from day 1359 🤦🏻‍♀️😆 NOT….. hey I’ve done this every night for 1361 days so sometimes the concentration might slip 😂 that’s my excuse anyway.

Thanks to an anonymous person on WordPress, for pointing it out. I laughed out loud when I read his comment. 😂

So back to day 1361 (I just typed 2361 there… one of those days!)

I had a more broken sleep last night. 7 hours 29 looks good but I felt like I was awake from 3am. My knee wasn’t agony but it kept twinging and waking me up.

As I write that I realise I STILL haven’t even opened the physio exercises yet?!? How hard is it to read a bit of paper?! I’m meant to be doing them 3 times a day.

Will do them after this. Promise.

Yesterday a dandelion wish flew out of a drawer I was clearing and floated up into the air. I thought how pretty it was and how random to see it in the middle of the office, in January…. Then my friend Isy posted this…

I messaged to tell her. Then this morning she gets this on her FB feed… I love it when there is synchronicity like this.

I also typed the name of a supplier today and before I’d finished they were calling me! I love it!

So I’ve been in a good mood today. I’ve been working on pricing spreadsheets all day so I’m a bit square eyed but I enjoyed it. Compiling data. My fav.

I’m tired tonight. Craig’s working and I was planning to get lots done but actually I’m quite comfy sitting in on the couch relaxing…. Which is all I ever do on these winter nights. It’s hard to break that habit as I enjoy the chill out time after a working day.

I love this next one.

And this is so true….

So thankfully I release just about everything that goes on in my mind these days. No chance of me suppressing anything much. 😂

Nothing much else to report. There was a lovely sky when I left work at 4… such a shame the view is from an industrial estate!

It was light all the way home, which is lovely and the first time I’ve really noticed it. There was a lovely sun setting sky from the back garden too.

The pups are asleep and I have my feet up. Early night for me I think. Mrs spreadsheet head!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1359 sleep, jog, dog walk, housework, dinner out!

Another great day in the life…. Though some random anxiety mid day… 🤷🏻‍♀️

I slept like a log last night…. Not surprising I guess after 10.7k in a kayak and all that sea air… but I did have my knee up on a big pillow at the physio’s advice. That seems to have made a difference, though tonight will be the real test as I’ve used my knee a lot today.

I went for a walk/jog/run with Rachel two doors down…. And we actually ran for most of the route, it’s so good to be back out there ~~running~~ jogging!

We did Tough Mudder together in 2022 and ran at a really similar pace. We stopped when either of us needed to and we both felt tired at different times. Neither of us actually like running, which is half the battle!

So at 10am today in the freezing cold thick frost, we gingerly set off. Baby jog steps!!

Selfie in motion!

It’s another stunningly beautiful day.

The roads were slippy!

We walked down the two slippy hills just to be on the safe side but did run most of the way.

Don’t think either of us expected that. Just plodding along at the same speed makes all the difference. We both don’t like to hold anyone up if we’re running with someone faster. It makes it less enjoyable.

So it wasn’t much, it ended up being 23 minutes but I think that’s a really good start.

It’s way more than I managed during the Christmas holidays. All in all today, 15,877 steps so far!

When I got in, I was still quite fired up so took Calaidh up the hill…..

Everything is so pretty in the frost.

Then who suddenly appeared?!? Nacho with Rachel!! He’s off to catch Calaidh!

The Garnock valley looks stunning with the the fog over Kilbirnie loch.

I came home and did housework before Criag and I took the dogs over to the field across the road. This is where my anxiety arose…..

I’m overwhelmed walking four dogs… it’s just completely above my pay grade. I imagined sooooo many things going on. I felt really anxious but instead of holding it all in, I did tell Craig. I didn’t want to spoil the walk and I knew I would if I held it all inside.

He wanted to take them down to Irvine beach park but I was worried there would be too many dogs down there.

When we were in the field I was upset by Khaleesi barking so much, which she does as she has fun…. I thought the dogs might get out the field, was worried someone else would come in the field and we shouldn’t be there. You name it… floods of anxiety.

Here’s the Scottish Dog Behaviourist sitting on a tree stump, calling a client who had some questions, while we were in the field.

The dogs had a blast!

I didn’t actually relax until we got home.

I need to do some work on that.

Here’s Leesi in her new coat. Bless her.

We decided to head to Gro Coffee in Irvine as I got vouchers from Craig’s mum and stepdad for my Christmas.

The sun was just starting to set when we arrived….not a breathe.

Love the way these flats are lit up by the sun.

You can’t book in Gro and they said it would be a 45 minute wait…. So I dragged Craig towards the sunset.

Look at the reflections! My friend Helen will be so proud of me for looking at the reflections.

TEN MINUTES later Gro called and we had to rush back!! There’s a bank of cloud running along the base of Arran so I think the actual sunset would have been stunning but we had to head back.

All of these were taken while walking very fast!!

Our food was the usual Gro standard…. Lovely! meat feast pizza, chicken tenders, halloumi fries and skin on fries.

So all in all, minus this afternoon’s anxiety, I’ve had THE best weekend.

It looks like it will be frosty and sunny most of the week. Long may it continue.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1330 a beautifully cold, sunny day!

I have to admit that I am wrapping Khaleessi up like a baby when she goes to bed at night…. I never thought I would be that person. I’m worried she gets cold 😳😬😂 here’s Bhru trying to get some of the action last night 😂

She was gonna sleep over but decided to go to her own bed at the last minute!

I had a VERY hot night. I went to bed with straight hair and woke up like I’d been dragged through a hedge backwards!

The sheets were soaking wet! It’s obviously a hormonal thing. The house wasn’t warm at all.

While I’ve been having a lovely time of it these last few weeks, my hormones have been really playing up. Is it socially acceptable to have hold the weight of your chest every time you get up from your desk?!? Asking for a friend obviously….. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 😂😂 honestly it’s been agony. I tried ibuprofen today and it didn’t touch it. It’s waking me up every time I move in bed… not for long just long enough to get comfy again. Hey ho… the trials of being peri-menopausal.

So for those of you who are squirming now… it’s just photos from here on in 😂

Scraping the heavy frost by the light of the moon this morning.

So thankful I’m not having to scrape the van anymore!

Team scraping Claire’s car!

It was another stunning drive to work.

Then all of a sudden I spotted this red sky.

Later on the sun came up and it was a beautiful day.

I had another lovely Tupperware tub salad for lunch today…. Rocket, Bavarian ham, Mexicana cheese, cracked black pepper cheese, tomato, celery, spring onions, pumpkin seeds and olive oil!

Unfortunately I then ate 4 of boss man’s chocolate digestives, in quick succession!

When I left tonight the sky was lovely again.

And the moon was just out of this world. NONE of these photos actually do it justice. I hope you’ve all been able to see it for yourself. It was a massive orange ball in the sky tonight. I stopped by the river in Drybridge on the way home from work.

This is the view of the sunset opposite where I stood.

I stopped again closer to home. 🌕

I could live life without wind and rain… very easily. This is lovely weather. Sunny cold and crisp during the day. Just perfect.

A lovely end to the day.

Have a lovely evening.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1327 a lovely sunny Saturday with another trip to Largs !

What a beautiful day!

It was such a heavy frost this morning…. -4°C when I left for the little gift shop. It was so cold but a beautiful, clear sky day.

I actually had a lie in until 8am. Can’t remember the last time I managed that. Turns out Craig was up with Calaidh at 2.30am….

I heard nothing!

She was barking and he shouted at her a couple of times to go back to bed , WHILE LYING RIGHT BESIDE ME….. nothing. That amazes me.

This was the view out the window when I woke up. Ignore the scabby sky dish!

Khaleesi enjoyed her first hard frost…. Think she’s jumping up thinking jeezo this is baltic!!

The little gift shop was really busy and I came back up the road for a bowl of soup in front of the wood burning stove… all sounds super cosy as lovely doesn’t it! 😂 there’s 4 excited dogs bounding around in the midst of all that!

When Craig came home from work, we headed back to Largs for fish and chips The Fish Works in Largs. Yes I had just eaten but I wasn’t missing this for anything.

When Craig asks me what I want to do… I ALWAYS suggest this… but he drives every day with work so doesn’t want to go back out. I’m so chuffed he wanted to go today and we had a lovely fish and chips!!

Largs is so different from yesterday…. So still and calm.

There are no photos of the restaurant, or their food…. We ate outside and you have to be very careful with the seagulls!!

The fish and chips really are exceptional. I had lemon sole and Craig had battered king prawns 🍤 (who knew there was a prawn emoji?!?)

It’s not like a standard chippy and nothing is greasy. I can’t recommend it enough!

We went for a wee walk after the food. So I could take some photos… obviously!

I should say it’s only 3.30pm!

It was just beautiful!

Speaking of beautiful…. The Aurora is just kicking off in the UK tonight…. How much do I actually want to see it though, I can’t bring myself to get wrapped back up and get out there. I want it to come to my back garden to save me the bother! Still way too much light pollution for that….

On the way back from Largs I got my trusty Co-pilot to take photos of the moon as it was massive and so low in the sky.

I commented that it looked like we were on Tattooine. (Star Wars!)

He was awfy proud of me!! Star Wars wife!

You can just about see it above the trees on this photo. I’d have obviously got a better shot than this but I take that I can get 😂😂😂😘

We went into the pub for a couple when we got home. I had 0% Whitley Neil raspberry “gin”. Very nice.

This was the moon when I walked the 10 steps back to the house. You can see the frost on the roof too.

Have a lovely Saturday evening!

I’m kayaking with Lindsay in the morning and I am beyond excited. I have ALWAYS wanted to learn to kayak. 🛶 I’m hoping this will open up a whole new world on the water.

Stay safe everyone 🛶🌅🛶

Day 1326 eye test in Largs, shopping, housework & dog walks… I’m knackered!

Up at 6.30 to head over to Largs for my eye test at 8.30am. I booked the early morning one so that I could make the most of my day.

It was much more windy and choppy than I expected. It was also freezing!! The sunrise was lovely though.

Marvelled at how close these churches are.

My eye test at Specsavers went well. My prescription has only changed by one point so I don’t need to change my glasses just yet. I did go for a cheap pair of reading glasses, in the new prescription, for more intense reading, but my varifocals will do me just fine just now.

They did find a new freckle at the back of my right eye.

Who knew that was a thing?

They sent me back for a second “back of the eye” photo, so they could catch it specifically. The guy got a great capture of it.

I need to go back in 3 months for the same again so they can monitor the size of it. Any growth is bad.

I got out at 9.20am and found that hardly any of the shops were open.

I went into Costa Coffee and had a peppermint tea (who actually does that?!?) to heat up and use the loo…. Not necessarily in that order!!

I then had a wander around the charity shops. I found River Island jeans and a Fat Face top for £11 in total in the British Heart Foundation Charity shop.

I commented that they have some really lovely things in the Largs BHF shop… the lady told me they only put out the best of everything and try to display the brands as much as possible, in that particular store. I was really impressed with everything they had today.

I took more photos as I headed back to the car.

Next stop, Tesco, for a food shopping and came home and put it all away. Played with the dogs out the back, loaded the dishwasher, put away dry washing and put on a new load.

Then I took the two Cal’s…. Calaidh and Khaleesi out for a walk. It was beautiful but cold!

Khaleesi has lots of fun off the lead. I don’t keep her off for long.

You need to be standing steady when you shout come….. when she comes, she comes…. Wallop!!!!!

Craig was home by the time I got back. He still had work to do, so I set off out with a Freya and Bhru.

It’s already getting dark.

The same road on two separate dog walks.

The same tree at 3 separate times today.

The moon is massive.

It’s been a lovely day. I also fasted for just over 22 hours today which was a lot but I needed a wee fat burn after all the junk I’ve been eating since the weather turned colder.

Oh I also made more soup today which is really good again, great to break a fast with.

So yeah, a productive day off work!

Lovely to see sunrise and sunset. It’s the best part of this time of the year.

Have a great weekend!

Stay safe everyone 🌅🌅🌅

Day 1311 a lovely sunrise and sunset with work and a haircut in between!

It’s all in the title 😆

I woke up to torrential rain pummelling the window pane this morning. 5.30am.

By the time I left for work, the heavy rain cloud was moving on.

I suddenly noticed the bright star next to the moon…. I believe it was actually Venus.

I’ve never seen anything that bright, that close to the moon.

It was a lovely drive in this morning, no rain and pretty skies.

I was in work early again and got loads done. I love feeing organised when I finish on a Thursday.

It’s my weekend!

I rushed home to get my haircut in the garden room straight across the road from the house. It’s so cool to have your hairdresser over the road.

There are no pics as I just sat and watched the last episode of House season 4 and I cried….. 😂😂😂

The sunset was pretty too.

I saw this earlier and I really liked the sentiment of it. I’ve read it through a lot.

I’ve spent so long raging at the river that I am honestly say acceptance and being present in the moment if so freeing.

I’m listening the Diary of a CEO podcast at the moment. It’s fascinating me. Todays episode said we wear busy-ness like a badge of honour. We expect to be saluted for working all the hours god sends, for having the busiest social life and actually we all need to reward each other for taking time out and looking after ourselves. That needs to become the new norm.

I used to go in early and work late. I thought that’s what was expected of me.

I carried on doing it for most of my career… I began to resent it.

I told everyone how busy I was, how stressed I was, how hard I worked, I was proud of it all while despising it.

I LOVED my job title. It defined me.

I was never happy with what I had. I always wanted more.

I earned a lot of money and yet it was never enough.

When I finally broke and went off sick I felt like a failure. I felt like that for a very long time.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t get the occasional pang of failure at times when I left my mind overthink…. But mostly I am truly grateful at having the chance to really think about what it is important in my life. Sadly too many people only experience this after some kind of trauma. If you have felt experienced this without having rock bottom then bottle whatever that is and sell it.

I finally don’t worry about what people think of me (but if you don’t like me please don’t EVER tell me as I would carry that about for years… 😳😆) I don’t care about the job title, about the money, about the things. I just have to do what’s right for me now. Instead of putting everything else first.

It’s true freedom.

Until the next wobble.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1304 I told you I’d be sensible 😘

I couldn’t do the fast today.

I have no idea what was wrong but I knew by about 11am, that I wouldn’t manage any prolonged fast today.

I regularly manage 16-19 hour fasts on a daily basis. I love the feeling of being hungry and knowing that I’m not gorging myself on food unnecessarily. I am eating less in between meals now as I am fuller for longer.

I woke at 5.49am this morning and felt instantly hungry. That’s unheard of.

I packed plenty water, peppermint tea bags and lemon and ginger tea bags and set off confidently into my day. My head was in a good place… I’d done lots of research, I knew what to expect and I was ready.

I don’t know what changed but today clearly wasn’t the right day. I felt really bad by the back of 11. I was dizzy, lightheaded and shaky. It ended up being 1pm when I finally got the chance to eat and I felt an instant relief.

Did my mind talk me out of it? Maybe…. I had no set target in mind. I wanted to try 4 days but was going to take it one day at a time and none of that was possible.

I had to order lunch from work and didn’t even enjoy what I ate.

I actually think it was the wrong time of the month for me. I’m mid way through the Progesterone which usually means the week of the month where I’m more likely to feast than fast.

I was upset, there were tears in my eyes but I just didn’t feel right. So I did the right thing.

It was a cold and frosty morning today.

Work was really busy again. I’ve been in early every day this week and still not getting through everything I need to do…. But I’ve really enjoyed the challenge this week. We had a great meeting last week and have made some changes and there’s a right good buzz about the place and I love it! I’m happy. (Check me!)

The sunset was brief but stunning this evening. I stopped in a layby on the way home from work.

The photos don’t actually do it justice.

I only live about 5 minutes drive from here and it was already gone by the time I got home.

It made it a lovely journey home.

Got my toes painted a lovely autumnal auburn red tonight at Viv’s Nails and Beauty ….not that anyone will be seeing my feet for at least another 5 months! 😂

Soooo tired tonight. Looking forward to a weekend without too much planned except a McMillan coffee afternoon on Sunday. that would have been interesting on an fast. 😂😂

Stay safe everyone 🍁🍂🍁

Day 1274 really could get used to this life!

I had the best sleep!!! The neighbours still came back in at 2.30am and put the tv on but I went straight back to sleep. It was soooo good.

There was another lovely sunset last night.

We had a lovely Chinese meal at the pre booked a la carte restaurant last night. The food was amazing.

I tried to get this selfie standing on a hill but I look tiny next to Gayle, it would have been a lovely photo if we could have been at the same height! 😂

We were lucky enough to have this stunning view from our table.

The restaurant was lovely too.

And the food was just so good.

Chinese prawn crackers, Indian popadoms and several dips

We both really enjoyed it… it was much cooler last night and we could have done with a jumper. I think the summer season is ending now as it was much cooler this morning too….. yet back to scorching as I lie here on my sunbed writing this.

Here I am this morning in my lemon loungewear…. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂😂😂 sweatshirt needed outside this morning.

We had a slightly later breakfast… this is the spectacular view.

and a pirate ship from a different location 😂😂😂

So we had a different morning today where we sat by the pool. It’s a completely different dynamic and a new view!

The pool was FREEZING. I didn’t expect it to be so cold. I had a good swim round it though.

We had lunch in the snack bar today but headed back down to the beach for Gayle’s favourite waffles and my favourite chocolate wrap thing…. Here is the lovely lady who makes them for us every day.

Her face lights up when she sees us. I would like her to be my Turkish gran…. So rude of me to believe she is old enough. On the first day we ordered way too much and we all laughed and she zipper her lips as if to say, telling no-one. 😂

View from the beach snack bar.

I had a lovely float in the sea after that. It’s so lovely in there. Then some woman went and fed the fish and I had to keep treading water until she was finished. Didn’t want to swim right though a fish feeding frenzy!!

Then there was a wee bit of drama as clouds of smelly, black smoke billowed out of the kitchens.

It went on for a wee while and was really smelly. So lucky it didn’t get any worse than that. Everyone was watching, even those in the sea.

It’s half 5 Turkish time so it’s a bit cooler now.. I may not have applied the sun tan lotion as liberally as other days oopsie. The sun is beautiful.

These pics were taken just outside the most scenic toilet I’ve ever been to 😂😂😂

Bored yet?!? 😂😂

Snapped at work!!!

Stay safe everyone 🇹🇷🌅🇹🇷

Day 1272 a lazy Sunday by the sea in Turkey!

It’s been another beautiful day in the life of a sunbather. Nothing else for it but to lie by the sea, watch the Didim/Altinkum pirate ships sails by and read.

It’s been a bit more cloudy and windy today but it’s still scorching. Factor 30 is doing a great job and despite 2.5 days out in the sun, neither of us have burned.

We caught a lovely sunset by the pool last night.

We went out for a walk into Didim Altinkum last night. The hotel looks lovely.

The streets are pretty quiet to be honest. It must be the season, suits me obviously but even I notice it was quiet.

I think this is us looking back to the lights of the hotel and the beach deck! Lovely moon too.

We had breakfast on the Panorama terrace and headed back down to the beach deck for the day. This was our home for the day!

We had a fancy bed decoration when we got back to our room!

Coffee (not decaf! 😂) and chocolate for a pre dinner snack, showered and back down for sunset. We literally made it with about a minute to spare. The photos don’t do it justice at all. It was absolutely stunning.

The sun was actually a giant, blood red ball in the sky.

Just had dinner and went for a walk…another lovely end to a lovely day!!

It’s so good to have nothing to think about, nothing to worry about, I’m still fasting, I’m eating plenty and having the best relaxing time…. With a very lovely friend….. While talking the hind legs off a donkey. 😂

Stay safe everyone ☀️🇹🇷☀️

Day 1192 a busy day at work, bags to charity, a massage and a wee trip to Largs!

I am so proud of myself…. I finally took 4 big bags of clothes to the charity shop after work. They’ve been sitting around for MONTHS! It isn’t hard to do and honestly only took maybe 20 minutes out of my way.

Check. Me.

Work was really busy again today, it’s been such a busy week. I was in military precision mode after I left work too!

Charity shop, fill the van with diesel and straight to my massage with the lovely Norma, at Harmony in Beith for 5.30pm.

It was SO good. My back bad been really bad after my holiday sleeping in the van. Norma worked her magic and it feels so much better!! So relaxing.

I then drove to pick Gayle up and we headed out to Largs for ice cream and a walk. It was surprisingly warm when we got there.

This is a bit blurry but the heart stone is still in the same place that we saw it before!!

It’s such a lovely random stone as we’ve both wondered if anyone has noticed it before?!?

The sun is shining and there only a light wind.

CalMac’s Loch Shira coming in to dock.

We got a two scoop tub of ice cream and sat on the promenade and chatted for ages, so much to catch up on. This was the view.

It clouded over as we walked and got a wee bit chiller. It’s such a lovely way to spend and evening!

Spotted this cygnet in the river. It was so fluffy!!

Largs looking lovely in the evening sun.

The tide has come in and covered the heart shaped stone on the way back!

A lovely evening with great company!!

Shattered now and my weekend has already begun.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1190 a brighter day today… still under a FB ban 🫣

Another blog that hardly anyone will read but hey… as I said, if you find it here then thank you 😘

I’m still barred from FB until about 10pm and then hopefully tomorrow I’ll be able to plead my case and get them to take me off this horrible list I seem to be on. I just want to go back to my account, unhacked and WAY more wary of the vulnerability of it all.

If that’s not possible then I will consider leaving FB altogether and I’ll find another way of publishing my blog and photos.

So yeah, I feel different today. I feel like I’ve accepted the reasons for everything that’s being going on. I woke up this morning, opened my eyes and knew instantly that something was different. I’ve felt really hard done to in the last week or so. I’ve felt like everything seemed a bit hopeless. I’ve seen the negative in everything.

I can’t tell you how good it is to feel a wee bit better. Life doesn’t feel hopeless today.

I don’t know why I feel better. There’s obviously always things that happen to me that I can’t write in the blog. Things that affect me but are not my story to tell. The blog feels like a real chore on those days.

I’ve been so irritated by everything this last wee while and today I see the positive in everything, the reasoning behind everything, rather than the anger. It really makes such a difference. However the switch got flicked I’m not complaining. It’s so draining when you feel mentally rotten.

It poured with rain overnight last night. Absolutely stotting down when we went to bed. it was the same again this morning.

Mid afternoon the sun came out and it’s been lovely and warm. Long may that continue.

I’ll leave you with some Just Jules sunset photos again…. Because they make me smile!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1165 the little gift shop on tour!!

It’s 21.56 and I haven’t written the blog yet. What a busy day!!! I’ll have to make this quick as I am ready for bed!

I’ve had another excellent day.

The Scottish Dog Behaviourist waved the dogs this morning and I was going to sit out in the sun and have a decaf coffee. Instead I decided to hoover the whole house, as you do. That said, I’m so glad I did it as I haven’t hoovered for weeks!!

Gayle and I decided at the little gift shop today, to go out another wee trip to Largs for ice cream tonight! 🍦🍦

I’m afraid it’s going to be another photo bomb 😆

We headed over for about 6.30pm and it was really misty and moody.