My new thing these last few days seems to be manifesting a word…. Yesterday’s was kindness.
Today’s was happy.
I did wake up to this wee face. Like every dog she’s all waggy tails and smiles until you point the camera at her.
We’ve settled into a routine in the downstairs bedroom. She has her side of the bed and I have mine.
We slept really well again last night. Only woke when I heard Craig getting up and coming down the stairs. (The bed downstairs really hurts his back, it’s been fine for me!)
So yeah, I’m working hard on changing my mindset just now and trying to focus on gratitude for what I have rather than wanting to fly around the world travelling. I saw “happy” and “happiness” in every post I saw today.
I wrote a little H on the side of my wrist, with a smiley face. If things irritated me through the day, I just remembered the H.
You cannot change things from a place of irritation or anger or wishing for change. I truly believe that you need to appreciate the day to day as it is and be grateful for what you already have.
I know all this but, for much of this year, I’ve been antsy about seeing the world or stressed about money or annoyed that things don’t go smoothly of a day. That’s not the right attitude.
I’m going to try and do some self help again this weekend as I have nothing planned.
Yes to this…
I’ve been really tired this week and have gone for early nights and haven’t been up early for running, in an attempt to recharge.
As I write this tonight, I’m sitting in front of the open fire, which is lovely. You would think it unnecessary for June, but it seems necessary today as we have some storm blowing over.
Time to batten down the hatches, be kind to myself and get another early night with a good book.
I started off the year with a rotten sleep and “woke” feeling really tearful and a bit down.
We went to bed at 2am and I woke at 4am with a throbbing knee and came downstairs to lie by the light of the tree one last time.
I lay there thinking what I heard on a podcast yesterday.
Why don’t I choose to be happier?
Why do I choose to be sad?
Ellison had messaged me yesterday and said she hoped I was enjoying the break from work…. I actually cringed when I thought jeez… some people are just never happy (meaning myself…. Not her!!)
I realised that I’ve been miserable doing nothing, while it’s actually been valuable time off work. Time that I would kill for when I’m actually AT work. Why can’t I appreciate what I have when I have it?
I spent yesterday’s blog telling everyone to appreciate the present moment, yet I seem to have been in a proper humph about everything this holiday.
I have NOT been choosing to be happy.
I’ve been choosing to be sad.
I tried to go back to bed after I’d let the dogs out and fed them this morning.
I just lay there being unkind to myself.
Talking down to myself.
The voice in my head was incessant. Until….
Today I’m going to choose to be happy.
I smiled when I thought that.
Life is what you make it…. I said that only yesterday.
I got up and went outside with the dogs. The sky was lovely.
Trying to get a photo of the puppers and here comes Khaleesi the photobomb!!
She was having a blast.
I then wandered down the bottom of the garden in my jammies and turned around to see this lovely rainbow over our houses.
Khaleesi is still careering around 😂😂
It started to rain but I stayed out in it to appreciate the moment.
I can almost see two rainbows in this next picture.
I sent some of the neighbours some photos as I thought it was really lovely right over our houses.
I then headed back in and had a good chat with Craig about how I’d been feeling and what I thought I needed to change. It was good for me. I felt better after it.
We had a good tidy and clean and sadly took down the Christmas tree. I’ve lost my lovely twinkly lights. I say that but the house is all fresh and clean and ready for going back to work.
The pub was open for New Year’s Day from 1pm so we headed in for about 2. I made a point of putting on a dress and putting makeup on as I wanted to make an effort.
New Year’s Day is a big day in our village life. We see lots of the villagers we don’t always see.
Rachel two doors down was my New Year’s Day “drinking” buddy!
I’ve had a lovely afternoon. I switched from 0% pink gin and slimline tonic, to Coke Zero pretty early on as I think the tonic was giving me a headache. I was totally fine drinking Coke Zero and didn’t feel strange for once.
I didn’t take my new favourite scarf off! The pub was cold!
We had lots of good chat. I didn’t feel uncomfortable at all. The chat just flowed.
We came home and ordered a takeaway from the new Indian in Beith. It was super fast delivery, HUGE portions and really good.
We have steak pie for today but thought we would cook that tomorrow when we have more time during the day.
So after a shaky start, I’ve had a lovely day. I’ve turned my head around.
Rachel and I have agreed to start a weekly run…. Even if we just start walking.
We ran together in Tough Mudder last year and ran at a similar pace. I want to do some more cardio and know I’m not likely to stick to it by myself.
So first step taken to making some changes.
She who doesn’t do New Year’s resolutions…. 😂
So on the eve of my last day off, I realise I really appreciate the time I’ve had off work. Even if I did just rest, read and watch movies… I musta needed it.
It’s 8.20pm and we have 364 more days of this new year to go and 364 more chances to be happy.
I mean where did that title even come from?!? I say it… I cringe but it’s actually very true.
It has not stopped raining all day. Not just a little bit… proper torrential thundering down rain. The sky is grey and pretty much, still seems dark. It never really got light today. It’s fully dark by 4pm if it wasn’t already.
Sooo… where to start…. I slept on the couch last night. Don’t worry there is nothing wrong other than Craig’s cold.
I was desperately trying to get to sleep before him last night.
I think I tried too hard.
I was almost panicking that I got to sleep before him. Nope too late, he’s off. I lay until 11.30 then came downstairs, read some of a book, and settled down by the light of the tree.
I slept from 12 until just before 7. Quite the thing. 🎄
We went to Lidl this morning TOGETHER…. to do a food shop. I could not tell you the last time we did that together. I wanted to go to Aldi but Craig said Lidl was closer. I like the fact both of those shops do more unusual food.
£125 later we head home and of course I have to clean out the fridges (we have two!) before I can put anything away. Another job done….and it feels good.
I’ll let you into a wee secret… we had a carton of Coconut Milk in the fridge that went off on 12th August!!! 😱😱😱
I am still loving the fact that the house is clean. I feel proud of living here rather than being stressed about the mess.
We watched Violent Night and had coffee with scones with cream and jam… or jam and cream?!? How do you do you do yours?!?
I tried it both ways… jam on first and cream on first. They tasted very different. I’m not sure I had a preference… they were all very good and it was far too much!
Violent Night is a great movie. VERY gory but still really Christmassy.
It’s the Scottish League Cup Final today and Rangers are playing Aberdeen and Rangers have just won the game. Craig is cheering, the dogs are barking… it’s all happening.
While he watched, I wrapped more presents and kept popping in and out to see what was going on.
My friend Anne was Mrs Claus across in the village hall this afternoon! She had already stared in the window and scared Craig as he had no idea who it was!! She popped in to say hello on the way home.
My friend Evelyn said she’d have called the polis 😂😂😂 (police!) I laughed out loud at that.
Calaidh’s been on good form today… lots of smiles 🫶🏼
Craig has his Christmas village all lit up.
Here are all my Christmas cuddly toys… Rudolph and Little Ted are my favourites!
Please ignore the mess on the dining table. This used to be our living room until we moved everything around… we still have the lights up on the ceiling. It looks super festive.
Once the football excitement is over I think we’ll have another Christmas movie.
Oh and the Aurora is likely to be visible all around the UK tonight but we’ve not seen the sky all day.
You need to be able to see the stars. Look North. Be in the dark and try to look through your camera on your phone as that’s how I saw it the last time.
Get Aurora spotting.
I only have 2.5 days of work left before the Christmas break. Woo hoo. Holidays are coming!
I may sleep on the couch again tonight. The Christmas tree lights shed a lovely light…. And you can hear a pin drop.
Good sleep despite having to get up at 2.30am to shut the window. The wind and rain were really loud overnight last night.
I was boyed up by my new found enthusiasm for life, but the weather was so dreich today and I found myself drained as the day went on. I felt bored by the mundane. To be fair today was stock check day which I sometimes love but today just felt like a chore as I have so many other things to do. Negative Nelly started talking me down again. By the time I came home I was raging that I couldn’t drink to numb my mind. Pissed off with myself for being strict with the fast so that I couldn’t gorge myself with chocolate to cheer me up.
Just BORED…..
I know great things come from boredom but I have so many things I just can’t be bothered doing.
I came straight in and made dinner and didn’t stuff myself full of snacks afterwards, but hit the fasting button straight away at 5.22pm. That will be me until lunch tomorrow. She who needs a bikini body by the end of September, can’t afford to eat junk!!
So we sat down over dinner with an old faithful show, New Amsterdam, and my whole body relaxed because I couldn’t listen to the voice in my head bitching about things that annoyed me. I shut her up.
Then I went to the Kinisi Flow class in the village hall at 6.30pm. I was looking forward to it (I’m as surprised as anyone else!) and I really enjoyed it.
I no longer feel bored. I feel tired but content.
I want to live in this bubble of happiness and awe and wonder at life 24/7 but life is not like that. I need to work at letting things go. Not over dramatising them in my head to make them bigger. the more we talk about them and share the story, the bigger we make them to soothe our own ego.
Just let things be and let them go.
I’m so full of wisdom as I write this…. 😂 not so much at the time!
Anyhoo….. I’ve been meaning to talk about the virtues of Castor Oil for weeks now and keep forgetting.
Ellison introduced me to Dr Barbara O’Neill on TikTok but also Insta and how castor oil has a number of amazing properties… not least of the reduction of inflammation, cysts and the like, in the body.
I bought a giant bottle for just over a tenner, and am going to bed at night with pads of castor oil in a sports bra to help reduce the 20+ cysts I have up there. Now this would be funny if Doc Barbara has shares in castor oil, but honestly she speaks very fluently about natural body healing. ❤️🩹 also not gonna lie, it’s a real commitment. Castor oil is a messy business, it does stain the sheets if it leaks out…. I’ve not done it for a few weeks now but I am going to go back to it. I even went to bed one night with a pad full of castor oil clingfilmed to my ankle!!!!! Life doesn’t get much crazier than that… and I wonder why I’m tired all the time. Thinking all this through! 😂
Anyway, a great end to the day. I’m standing in the garden, throwing balls for the doggos and leaning against a wall writing this. The seat is too wet because it poured with rain ALL day. That fine rain that soaks you. 😂
Such a productive morning! It seemed a long morning as I felt I got so much done.
We were up early as usual, which always helps. I stripped the end and got it in to wash as it was the last thing to do in our newly spotless bedroom.
We had one of Craig’s new ground coffees. I love grinding the beans 🫘 I always drink it black as I’m always fasting in the mornings, since the 20th December….. I should be a size 6 by now. 😂
I’ve been thinking of doing a vision board since Kinesiology last week. I got set up on Craig‘s laptop, through in the living room and we sat together, and I looked at loads of photographs of wonders of the world and places I’d like to visit. I saved them all into one file and will eventually get round to making them up into a vision board. It was so much fun to actually look at so many beautiful photographs. If I want to make something more of my photography, I feel that I need to search out some beautiful shots rather than just pointing and pressing with the iPhone. There are so many stunning places in the world to visit. I am keen to travel by train, plane or boat instead of driving. I’m also quite happy to go on guided tours because you find out so much more information than you would if you were on your own. It’s exciting to think of all the places we can explore.
We then got the dogs ready and took them down to the garage to pick up Craig‘s car. He’s had a leisure battery fitted for a camping trip he has planned for next weekend. It had been pouring all day yesterday and through the night and it was wet when we got up this morning, but we managed to walk half the way there before the heavens opened. It was actually a really nice walk even although we got soaked, it’s nice to be out in the rain sometimes.
So that’s really cool log along the way that someone had painted.
Drookit!!!
I also put a Abbie the Campervan up for sale on Autotrader…. And I sold some of the camping gear I put up for sale yesterday. Had a lovely lady come to the house and got chatting for ages. Poor Craig got stuck in the bathroom as we chatted for so long in the hall! He couldn’t walk out in his towel!!
So we were meant to meet our friends, Lynsey and Euan today to go canoeing on Kilbirnie Loch. How cool would that have been. They are seasoned kayakers and canoeists and were going to show us how it was done. Unfortunately it was too windy this morning for our first shot so we scrapped those plans and arranged to just meet for lunch. It’s a shame we didn’t get to canoe but looking forward to sometime soon. I’ve always wanted to go sea kayaking and Craig seems to have the bug for loch or river canoeing 🛶 so I’m happy to meet him there!!
We went to the new Lochshore Café for lunch. We had lentil soup and coffee and cakes! The cakes are so good I never know which one to pick. I ended up with a white chocolate rocky road which I’m sure is what I had the last time!
We always have such a laugh when we are together!
We took a lovely walk along the new Lochshore path, and I got loads of photographs at the side of the loch. Of course I did. Here are a few!!
I’m on the horse while they’re in the cart!!!
Turned into such a lovely afternoon. The sky was really blue and the clouds are very fluffy looking. Of course on the day where I do more walking than I have in a long time., my Fitbit stopped working, so I’ve no idea how many steps I’ve done but I’m sure it’s quite a lot!
A good laugh is very good for the soul!
I’ve been watching YouTube videos on the natural wonders of the planet since I got home. That seems to be my new fascination.
I’ve had a really great weekend so far. I’m looking forward to a Monday holiday too. It’s great to be sitting here on a Sunday night knowing that I don’t have to get up to go to work tomorrow, it makes a Sunday seem even more relaxing!
Wow nature is amazing… I’m just back from the most stunning dog walk through snow, fog and pure blue sky sunshine. I am absolute buzzing!
I’m really going to have to build in some time to delete photos every day if I keep taking this many. So I’ll keep the chatter too minimum today as it’ll take me hours to sift through the millions of shots. 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️😆
Suffice to say I have a huge big grin on my face and am absolutely loving life. I just need to do this every day…. Not too much to ask?!? 🤷🏻♀️🙄🤣
It started with Calaidh barking again this morning. I got up to the loo and looked out the window… ran back into the bedroom practically shouting that it had been SNOWING!
Not sure why us Scots feel the need to share our snow with each other but we really do. In the next hour or so there’s a pic from each set of parents showing off theirs!
7.15am Claire did the Christmas lights in the Memorial Hall yesterday🎄
So it wasn’t heavy at all but we don’t care we share it anyway!
Our bamboo!
My wee 81 year old lady phoned this morning so I had a 45 chat with her and heard all her news then decided to head out with the dogs. Calaidh first.
It was freezing fog but so stunning and atmospheric.
Reek Street Still in Reek StreetTop of Reek StreetLoved the snow on the dry stane dyke A gate 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤣That water must be freezing! This bush is covered in red berries Heading into Spiers Old School grounds My favourite gate in Spiers So moody! The spookiest tree ever! Big branch down in Storm Arwen on Friday Foggy field
All of a sudden on the road home the fog starts to clear. As I take this next photo I happen to turn to my left…
And see this…..
Don’t think this is the best picture but it’s the first one! I “think” this is the best one
It was really hard not to get too much of me in the photo as the sun is right behind me casting a shadow.
The sky ended up clearing to blue above it
I honestly can’t tell you how amazing it felt to be seeing this. It makes you feel so very good to be alive. I am so excited on a day when blog content just slaps me in the face!
By this time the sun is huge in the sky
Craig’s watching the Rangers game so I come running in the house shoving my phone in his face, chirping like a budgie and Rangers score their second goal. 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️😬😳🤣 least he was looking at a Fogbow when he missed it!
So back out with Bhruic and Freya but this time up the hill across the road. While I walk I’m sending the Fogbow pic to the family group chats…. As I look up…
Fogbow number 2!!! 😳🤯Got another photo of it closer to the farm
And carrying on round the corner I see another one. Not to be fair… this could just be the same one moving. 😆
Fogbow number 3 or 2 repeated?!?
Wow, wow and wow.
I spent years driving to and from a job I hated, making myself ill being in first and out last, priding myself in my busyness…. because I thought that’s what you had to do. I never looked up. Never stopped to look at anything.
I am so proud that I’ve come this far and am able to feel like this about the sky… I mean come on. Get a room. (That makes no real sense at all but it was funny in my head?!)
The Fog’s still hangingThe Great Wall of fog! Rising above the fog in the valley Trees emergingBig patch of snow Freya’s not impressed I don’t ever remember seeing the fog clear like this The small steeple to the left is Beith Parish ChurchThese trees made lovely patterns on the roadThe road home
So now have my feet up in Gran’s chair.
The puppers are worn out
I’m enjoying a Turkish Apple Tea which Claire got me for my birthday.
And this is my view.
I hardly ever listen to music but it’s a playlist Craig made me for my birthday last year…. Each song means something to us… and it drowns out the football!!
Ours next door neighbour Holly provided a 3.30pm lunch/dinner…
Haggis, beeps and tarries with a whisky creme sauce!
It was the special in the pub this week. How lucky were we? It was so good.
The sky is darkening now. I’ve still to think about Christmas shopping, make tomorrow’s breakfast and lunch and write some words around my Fit Body Farm nomination and I really wanted to crochet today. But that’s ok. It can all wait.
So once again it’s nearly Sunday night and we face the week ahead. Remember if anything hits you that you feel you can’t handle, it’s only temporary. It will pass. Just keep on appreciating the present moment for what it is. Right here, right now. No worries foe the future, no shame of the past. Just what is.
The Rambling Sloth 🦥 