Day 1343 a busy Monday in December (with yet more reflections!)

Wow I really had to stretch for that title… what else can I say on a regular working day.

I had THE best sleep again… woke up 4 minutes before the alarm…. We’d been in bed from 9.30 too.

Rachel two doors down, has decorated the village hall tree and it looks lovely!

Actually it’s a tinny blip on the horizon in this photo of the village hall looking festive. it’s a lot bigger than it looks here!

There was a lovely sunrise once I got to work.

It’s really strange driving to and from work in total darkness just now.

It’s 6°C today which should be positively tropical compared to the cold spell we’ve had… yet it was cold. I didn’t have all my thermal gear on. I had to take a tin of soup for lunch today and boy, was it rough after all my homemade soup!

I was meant to be off on holiday today for Christmas shopping but have a lovely lady’s funeral on Thursday 21st so had to hold my holiday for that. It’s fine as the day passed quickly with no drama from the Julesie for a change. 😂

The above is so true. It’s just about remembering to change your natural reactions when you respond to something. It’s not always easy but being aware of it is half the battle.

I went to the Aldi after work tonight and it was HEAVING….. I helped a wee lady find the Aldi alternative to Bisto gravy granules and she was so pleased with me. She said she knew she was right to ask me…. She made me smile all the way around the shop. I then looked for her when I found actual Bisto on one of the centre aisles, but I couldn’t see her. I love making those small connections with people I don’t know. Something simple, something nice and we both have a wee smile.

Christmas is a difficult time for so many people.

I’ll tell you I hate Christmas and New Year… but really I don’t have the evidence to back that up anymore. I just think I do.

Please know that any of these numbers are available to you in the UK.

Early December 2019, I was at my lowest ebb… I honestly couldn’t see how I could make it through Christmas and New Year. The pressure to be festive. The pressure to perform. Watching everyone else “appear” happy and festive. Eating, drinking and being merry. I just wanted to cry all the time. I wanted to hide. Not to be seen by anyone.

Thankfully I went to the Doctor as it was so bad and she really listened. She saw the state I had got into and she decided to change my anti-depressants. I could hear the concern in her voice. She booked me the first appointment on the 27th December at 9am so that I knew I was going to see her and give her an update.

Quite honestly I was never going to do anything bad but I felt so low that I just couldn’t see the point of life anymore.

I think it’s important for me to keep talking about that as to see me now you wouldn’t think it.

We have no idea what’s going on in other peoples heads. We have to be kind to everyone we meet.

Christmas doesn’t have to be the matching jammies, the perfect tree, the most nights out. Christmas can be a quiet time too. It is what you make it and not for comparison with others, that look like they have it more together than you do.

Just do what you want and when you want it. Be kind to yourself.

Stay safe everyone 🎄🎄🎄