Day 1271 in and out the sea all day… it’s a hard life 🏝️☀️🌊🏊🏼‍♀️👙🤿🇹🇷☀️

I slept like a log last night…. My head hit the pillow about 10.30 and didn’t waken until the incessant Turkish chatter kicked in from next door at 8am. 😂😂 I’d love to see how long I would actually have slept, if I hadn’t been woken up! The women next door obviously want to be first for breakfast 😂 they are very loud first thing in the morning!

This is my current view.

Dinner last night was in the Panoramic restaurant which is MASSIVE. Unfortunately they have created the image of a large university refectory which wasn’t the most intimate of surroundings. It was Turkish night and there was a huge selection of food!

The main pool looks lovely at night.

We were going to head into town but in true Julie fashion, headed back to our room as we were shattered from the day.

It’s been a scorcher all day today. We went for breakfast and I had Turkish coffee which was really lovely. I thought it might be a bit strong but it really hit the spot. I don’t eat anywhere near as much as I used to so I was still full from dinner last night. I managed a 16 hour fast. I know I’m on holiday and won’t an age that every day but I’ll do it when I can. The view from breakfast is beautiful.

The restaurant is a little bit nicer during the day. A little less stark and bright white.

On our way down to the beach deck.

This is how we get in and out the sea. Now interestingly enough, the tide does not seem to come in our out here. I’m not sure how that’s possible but the sea is at the same level every time we go in?!?

We sat here for the morning, our on the beach deck. It’s very sheltered.

The pirate ships all head past just before 11am. They must leave Altinkum at 10 or 10.30.

I am that sad that I counted 11 of them heading out this morning.

There are loads of wee fish in the sea! I’m writing this in the sunshine so not sure if this photo shows them or not!

Very random arty shot trying to catch the stunning view from the mirror passing the gents toilets 😂😂 then realised I’m actually in it 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

Current view watching the pirate ships heading back in. We had a lovely chocolate waffle lunch in the beach cafe. We swim, chatted, read, chatted, more chat 😂😂 it really is the perfect chance to relax.

Loving the windswept photoshoot!

A perfect end to a sunbathing day. Back now to get ready for dinner!

Stay safe everyone ☀️🇹🇷☀️

Day 1270 Turkish massage day! 🇹🇷💆🏻‍♀️💆🏻‍♀️

We didn’t get to bed until after 1am Turkish time. We had the air con on…. As you do. We both woke up about 3am absolutely freezing!!! What a laugh trying to get the aircon to go off. The remote control needed the batteries reseated before it would switch off. I went back to bed in joggies and a sweatshirt with a blanket over me too!! Woke up at 8.30am to very loud Turkish chatter next door and lashing in sweat! Air con back on. 😂😂

By the time we got up and moving it was 11am. We had tea and coffee on the balcony.

And we did a first round of the hotel complex. (I know…. Never start a sentence with and!)

Gayle outside our little bungalow garden room.

We found the Turkish massage place straight away and got that booked for 12.30pm. Best to have a good body scrub before you get any sunburn.

So the Turkish massage was out of this world. Gayle went first though, we went in together. Firstly we were in the Hammam, the Turkish bath. You lie on a hot marble table in the middle of the Hammam and they rinse you with water from the sinks that surround the room. Then they scrub you with a scrub mitt and then with Turkish coffee…. Which smells amazing!!!! Then rinsed off again and they soapy suds you with the soapiest soap suds ever. It was so silky smooth… you just lie there and they run it all over your body and gently massage it in. A full rinse again and then you stand up for a full rinse down. Then towel off.

You then sit out on a lounger and have a drink while your “bather” gets rinsed off and changed herself.

The massage is something else!! That wee girl was up on the bed, totally astride me at times and, with the tiniest of hands, delivering the most powerful massage.

We had a full body massage, there were hot stones half way through and a facial with a mud mask to finish off…. With Turkish Apple tea. It was sooooo lovely!

So we are all scrubbed up and ready to go for some sunshine!

I love the decking out into the sea. You can get in and out of the sea without having to fight your way through the busy beach. The hotel has a private beach but it was very busy when we got down to it at 11,30am. The decking has had empty beds all day.

Sitting on the balcony now about to get ready for dinner!

It’s a hard life 🇹🇷

Stay safe everyone ☀️🇹🇷☀️

Day 1269 off to Turkey with Gayle! 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿✈️🇹🇷

It’s 10.22am and I’m sitting outside Viv’s Nails and Beauty, waiting to get my toes and eyebrows done.

I’m not sure how best to describe my mood… in true me fashion, I’m gonna try!

My stomach is churning. I’m all over the place, I’m frantic at worrying about all the things that might go wrong.

When I actually stop to breathe I know that I am completely in control. There is no stress. There is no panic. As long as I have my purse, phone and passport I will be ok. My head is so used to over dramatising everything, the voice in my head lashes out with an “ah but” every now then. It’s determined to trip me up and stop me from being in control.

We picked Gayle ip at 12.45…. We left the house twice… I had to go back for my hand luggage. I have enough hand luggage to choke a horse. You can just never be too sure in my anxiety ridden world. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

We headed into the airport…. To Jet 2 bag drop, where you actually weigh your suitcase yourself. That’s a new one on me.

We headed into the departures and got through security pretty fast. As we were both starving we went to Frankie & Benny’s for lunch.

Halloumi ceaser salad for me and Arribiata pasta for Gayle with garlic bread to share. A Coke and a Diet Coke. That’s how we roll on a holiday with a tee totaler and someone who doesn’t drink much at all. 😂

We went back to DuTy Free and got some perfumes for £20. I have to say the duty free prices were extortionate! Not what I remember. I think I’ve got CK One Everyone or Everything, it was really nice.

Everything went like clockwork as we literally walked straight through to gate 26 and onto the plane.

It’s dads birthday today and sadly his birthday card has had to come to Turkey with me as there were no stamps for sale in the airport and nowhere to post it anyway!!

We’re about 3 hours into the flight and we’re finally both tired. I can’t load images and might not get this posted tonight.

There was a beautiful sunset!

We flew over what I assume were the Swiss or Austrian Alps. That was really pretty but didn’t come out in a photo.

It’s dark now and nothing to see anymore.

Excited to see what our hotel is like when we get there!

We got a little golf buggy to our room!! It’s now 1.22am and we’re 2 hours ahead. Sitting out on our balcony!

Stay safe everyone 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿✈️🇹🇷

Day 1268 Breast Screening appointment and OUT OF THE OFFICE is on!! 🏝️☀️👙🏊🏼‍♀️🌊

My out of the office was all set up and ready to go and 4pm. Truth be told I typed it all up on Monday, ticking off another thing on my to do list. The out of office voicemail is also on…. Wonder how many months it will take me to switch that back off?!?! Let’s not think of that just yet 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I got a very teeny, tiny long lie this morning . Ok… so I was still awake but I stayed in bed a bit longer. I had my first over 50’s breast screening appointment at 9.06am in Morrisons car park in Johnstone.

I’ve had a few before (under 50 obvs!), as I’ve found lumps in the past, which have always been cysts. This was the first call just because of my age.

It’s actually very clever…. Reception is just inside the door at the top of the stairs, there are 3 cubicles… you are allocated one, you take your underwear off and put your top back on and sit and wait till you’re called.

You leave your underwear and jacket in the cubicle and take your bag into the screening room.

For all you men out there who have no idea… breast screening is where you stand top half naked and they whap a boob onto a plate and squeeze it with another plate until it’s as flat as it can be. 😧

You have to do each one front on and each one side on while your arms are up in the air and your hugging the machine. That’s FOUR boob pancakes…… It is fairly uncomfortable and a wee bit sore. After having had a few, I know not to panic but it really is the strangest thing. There surely must be an easier way to do it but hey….

It’s done and results in 3 weeks. We are very lucky to get this free in Scotland.

So back in Bertie Beetle and flying back to work. Did I mention I love driving again?!? It’s soooo much better.

I was already completely in control at work and ready to finish up, so today was about tidying up all the loose ends.

I feel like I’ve ticked all the boxes and crossed off all the lists but I’m sure there will be something major that I’ve forgotten. 😆

Here’s my last view of Tartan Campers until Monday 9th October!! That sounds like ages away, doesn’t it.

It was actually a lovely morning, a nice sky and very calm. The calm before todays Storm Agnes hits. Our ivy is starting to turn and is looking lovely.

The storm had already hit by the time I left Tartan. It had rained for hours!! To be fair, so far, I’m not sure why it has a name as it doesn’t seem that bad. It must be worse somewhere else.

I’ve finished packing and just have the last minute stuff to do tomorrow.

Tonight Craigie and I are having a quiet night with all the candles on. We were going to go out for dinner but we’ve both been out all day, so decided to stay in. It’s so autumnal today that the candles are lovely.

Tomorrow Gayle and I head to Bodrum in Turkey. Our flight’s not until 4pm so there’s still time to get organised.

My ramblings might not always be daily or on time… I’ll see how it goes. Stay tuned to my Fb page as there will most likely be photos!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1267 the night before the night before I go on holiday!

Wide awake at 5am this morning. I read for a bit and then felt shattered when it was time to get up. I feel shattered now!

We had our AGM last night where I resigned from the Gateside Memorial Hall Committee. I did few bad but I know that it’s right for me at this moment in time. I still have to transfer over financial signatory so that will still take a bit of time I guess.

There was a very bright moon last night. It was a real surprise when I went outside with the dogs after 10pm.

So I only got 6 hours and 23 minutes sleep last night. Looking forward to an early night tonight.

It’s been another good day at work with lots of progress in the workshop and a good vibe about the place. I feel pretty well caught up and ready to finish up for holiday at 4pm tomorrow. I don’t feel ready to go on holiday yet but I’m sure some time spent dedicated to packing and I’ll be there!!

I’m still filling my knee full of ibuprofen and paracetamol so I will have to take tonight’s Kinisi-flow exercise class, easy. I know I’ll feel better once I’ve been there though.

There’s also a possibility of Aurora over Scotland tonight. It’s very cloudy with us so maybe unlikely here but hopefully some folks get to see it!

So yeah, not much else from me today. I need to get dinner, collect some packing stuff together and get to Kinisi-flow for 6.30pm!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1266 back at the office for 3 whole days!

Oooooh my flight home last night was a rough one. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿✈️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

It was delayed by an hour due to a hold up in Amsterdam. to be fair, the hour passed fairly quickly.

There was a lovely sky when I left Bristol.

I didn’t take many photos as I a bit too scared to look out the window!

I found comfort by squeezing my belly button right into my back so that my stomach didn’t feel the roller coaster ups and downs, and shoving a fingers in my ears to drown out the noise during landing. Sure I looked as calm as a calm thing. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

It was a pretty hairy take off to start with so the landing didn’t come as any major surprise. We had up to 61mph winds forecast.

I am never flying again.

Until Thursday of course. 😱😬

So yeah, home to lots of cuddles from the doggos.

Today has flown in back at work. Don’t know where the day went. I’m so busy this week trying to finish up for Turkey but also have something on every evening too. I’m finding it really difficult to pack for my first foreign sunshine holiday in years, I can’t remember what I need to take, but hey, an excuse to buy whatever I leave behind. 😆

I have the Gateside Memorial Hall Committee AGM tonight, where I am resigning as Assistant Treasurer and from the Committee.

I am surprised, but I just don’t take to the formality of a Committee, to be honest. It just doesn’t seem to be my cup of tea, for some reason. Rather than the dread of going to a meeting, I am choosing to leave. I’m more than happy to help out at functions in the hall but just not to got though the committee formality. I couldn’t wait to be a part of it at the time…. And to be Treasurer was a real honour…. Yet as with other things in my life, I’ve tried them and have chosen to move on.

The meeting is at 8pm when I’m usually ready for my bed!! It’s 18.47 and I really need to go upstairs and do some Turkey packing before I go…. I keep putting it off. 😬

Just do it!!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1265 a bus trip, 17k steps around Exmouth and Bristol to Glasgow 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿✈️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

I am shattered!!! It’s nearly 3pm and I’m in Bristol Airport awaiting my return flight to Glasgow at 16.55.

I made the mistake of checking the weather back home and am freaking out about how windy it is. 😱 To be fair I’m so tired, I think I’ll be out for the count the minute I sit in the plane.

I’ve had the best weekend. 🫶🏼

Slept like a log again and we woke just after 7 and decided to head out for the 9am open top bus around Exmouth. The forecast wasn’t great so there was no open top bus, just a Stagecoach double decker! Those of you who know me, will be very aware that a Stagecoach bus is a huge part of my previous life. I used to be a Contract Manager in a bus building factory, and Stagecoach were my customer. I then went on to manage the team of Contract Managers, but that’s a lifetime ago.

I actually helped them design the Stagecoach Gold bus that we were on this morning. It was my job to help them source all the colour matches to their spec requirements back in around 2012. It was a huge investment into their fleet.

This bus was a huge trip down memory lane.

HUGE…. But I don’t live that life anymore. The gold spec looks a little worn on this particular bus.

The bus went back out to Sandy Bay, where we walked to on Friday.

It looked very different today. Actually, you can’t see the beach from the bus so it just looked very cloudy and windy. It was lovely to see some of Exmouth that we wouldn’t have managed on foot. This is the restaurant we had lunch in on Friday.

We got off the bus in the centre of Exmouth and walked all the way back along the beachfront again. It was super blustery but lovely to see it all in different conditions. It was meant to pour this morning and it’s actually been dry all the time, which was a bonus.

We had a lovely breakfast in Aby’s Café down on the sea front. We had scrambled eggs and avocado on brown toast. It was really lovely.

We set off at 12.30 for Bristol Airport as it’s quite a trek.

Walking into Bristol Airport.

I’ve found a wee quiet spot in a very busy airport and I’ve managed to get my feet up. I tried to have a snooze but it doesn’t seem as easy on my own. 😆

I’ve brought a plastic bottle with me, you get it through security, empty and every airport has water fill stations now. I used to spend a fortune on bottled water at the airport. I didn’t spend a small fortune on some sushi and crisps. 😆

A really lovely weekend but looking forward to seeing Craigie and the pupsters for a few days before I head off to Turkey. Don’t worry, I’m knackered at the thought of it too, but it will be super relaxing when I’m there…. And sunshine…. There will be wall to wall sunshine!!

I still have an hour to wait but surely that will be taken up by finding my gate etc… then I can sleep.

Thanks so much to Helen and her family for the best weekend!!

Stay safe everyone 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿✈️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Day 1264 a lovely day in Exeter with Helen & Mike

23,620 steps!! That will raise my average for the year 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

Someone slept in until 9.06am precisely this morning. It wisnae me.

I did have another great sleep though and managed 8am.

We decided to head into Exeter today on the train. It was lovely and warm and calm when we left, after yesterdays breeze.

I took these from the train window! What a lovely track!

We had wander round the main shopping street and then walked as much as we could around all the attractions. This is the Guildhall.

Exeter Cathedral.

We had lunch in Pizza Express after we met up with Helen’s partner, Mike.

We then took a walk down to the Quay area. What a lovely space next to the river and the canal. Highly recommend a visit here!

We went on the canal boat trip!

These cygnets put on a great display.

We got off the boat and walked back up the side of the canal. The reflections were stunning.

We spent the rest of the afternoon sitting by the river in a lovely antique cafe.

This little guy had some water out the dog water tub. Loved the colouring.

This was our view.

Mike headed off back to Plymouth and we got the train back to Exmouth. We didn’t need to eat again as we’d had such a big lunch so after a big drink of water we set off on another big walking tour of Exmouth.

The perfect end to a perfect day.

It’s 9.33 and we’ve been in bed since 9pm! 😂

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1263 exploring Exmouth in the sunshine ☀️

I have done 27,150 steps today and we’re not done yet! I will sleep tonight!!

We’ve had the best day exploring Exmouth. It’s been lovely and sunny with the odd passing squall. We didn’t even get wet though. So lucky with the weather.

My flight was perfect last bight. We took off early and landed early. I was there before Helen!!

We got to Exmouth at 1am and were both out for the count….. we’re sharing a bed and apparently I never moved all night!

So up at 8am and out before 10am and we have walked and walked and walked and walked and talked and talked and talked. I have some stunning photographs.

I’ve met up with Helen’s lovey daughters Zoë and Anna, after way too many years and met her cutie grandson.

We’ve had dinner with Helen’s mum and are having the loveliest chats. It’s been the best day!!

I’ll just share some quick pics just now as I am shattered!

I’m now at 27,943 steps. My sore knee is doing pretty well, considering. I’ve been on ibuprofen and paracetamol all day but it’s really helping.

A wonderful day!!!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1262 a good day at work and travelling ✈️ to Devon!

I slept like a log. Such a good sleep. Which is just as well as I’m going to be really late tonight. I’m flying down to Bristol at 10pm to stay with my friend, Helen, in Exmouth this weekend. We’ve had it planned since she came up to stay here in May.

Craig’s alarm went off at 5am as well 😳 great….. 🤦🏻‍♀️😬

I had a very hot shower this morning. I wondered if Craig had turned it up yesterday. I had to make it cooler. The shower also had a whine coming from it.

When I went to fill my water bottle, the mains cold tap ran like the hot tap usually would. There was no pressure. I found out later on that we had a burst water main down the road!

So still in the shower…… I’ve been reading Wim Hof’s book (not while in the shower!) about the benefits of having a cold shower every day. He recommends starting with 30 seconds a day for the first day 10 days and building up to two minutes.

I tried it today. 😳

Even 30 seconds was almost impossible for me. It hurt my head so badly. It’s gonna take some practice. I did start counting a bit faster towards the end. I have to say I did feel pretty energised after it!

Been meaning to say how much I am loving driving Bertie the Beetle. It’s sooooo lovely to drive. I’m actually enjoying driving again.

I’m also very impressed with my fuel consumption. I filled up on 7th September at £77 and I still have 65 miles in the tank. I’ve driven 454 miles so far. The van matched that mileage but closer to £120 for a tank. I’m saving £43 every time I fill the tank. Wow.

In other news, I’ve really hurt my left knee. I was trying to step in and out a van that was on the ramps yesterday. My knees couldn’t cope with the height of the step…. Jeez old age doesn’t come lightly. As I stepped down to the ground, the knee I left in the van stretched a bit too much.

I’ve been hobbling about all day. Hope it eases off.

I was really clear headed and got lots done at work today. I felt ready to finish up for holiday and yet I am actually back for 3 days next week before Turkey. I’m sure there will be stuff I’ve missed but it felt good leaving today. I felt like I was in control.

So it’s now 8.25 and Craigie has dropped me at Glasgow Airport.

The sky was lovely on the way.

There was something strange when he dropped me off. We were sent to a different area to drop off and there was the smell of burning and the actual drop off area was all cordoned off.

I had to walk away in the other direction only to cross a road and walk back the other side. I was also due to fly out of Glasgow the day after the Glasgow Airport bomb attack. Our flight was delayed 24 hours and we had to queue for miles to get into the airport one by one. How security has changed since that day. It’s £5 to drop someone off!!!!!!! £5 for less than 15 minutes. That’s just ridiculous. Craig phoned to say he got through without paying as he was sent down a different road so all good there.

Love this sentiment!

So I’m flying EasyJet to Bristol tonight at 10pm. That seemed like such a good idea back in May. Means we have the whole day tomorrow rather than me arriving at lunchtime.

Helen Gray I’m coming to get you!!! ✈️😘🫶🏼

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1261 a much brighter day, still wet, dark and miserable though!

I always love the day after Health Kinesiology. The whirlwind has passed and only calm remains.

We covered loads last night, with the focus on me being really unsettled and out of sorts.

The hardest battle we face is with ourselves.

So very true. I’m still my own worst enemy at times.

I felt a real heaviness. Everything felt like a burden. Once again there was actually nothing wrong but I’d become weighed down by the amount of things that needed doing. Remember that some of these things were actually lovely, like holidays, but they just added to the drama inside my head.

This essence came up for me and as always, is scarily true.

I’m back on a even keel…. For a while anyway.

I think that I’m still so used to expecting the worst. My fight or flight response is still far too quick to kick in. I expect the worst all the time. Anxiety overthinks everything.

But not today. Today there is calm.

I got lots done at work as I’m having to plan ahead due to my holidays.

I came home and finally packed for my 3 days in Devon this weekend, staying at my friend Helen’s…. AND…

I put my clothes into my case for Turkey 🇹🇷 next week. check me!

All of these things have been causing anxiety. Today…. Packed, boom, done, what’s the worst that can happen?! Please all remind me that I have t packed any underwear for Turkey yet, so that could be awkward 🤦🏻‍♀️😂😘

This is the first night Craig has been in all week so I’m skipping the Crochet Hookers to spend the evening with him as I’m gallivanting for a while.

Check Khaleesi trying not to look at my fillet steak dinner.

It was very lovely.

So off to Devon after work tomorrow. Not flying to Bristol until 10pm so most likely be blogging from the airport tomorrow.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1260 a very wet and dark day ☔️🌧️🌧️🌧️☔️

It feels like it hasn’t got light all day today. That’s ridiculous to be fair, as it did, but it’s been sooooo wet and dark all day.

I’ve had a thumping head all day today. I woke up with it after what felt like a really deep sleep. Craig had Khaleesi wrapped in a crochet blanket when I woke up as the room was quite cold. I’d left the window open

I had to stop my fast at 11.30am, which I never do, as I just didn’t feel right. I was a bit shaky and I wondered if I hadn’t been eating enough. The food didn’t make much difference so I finally gave in at lunchtime and took some ibuprofen. It got a bit better but it didn’t really shift it.

Gemma pleated my hair today. How lovely is that?!?

When I came home I went out in the garden. In the torrential rain.

It was lovely.

I got soaked.

It was so peaceful apart from the drumming of the torrential rain… and of course the odd occasional dog bark. 😂

Since I was already soaked, I walked round the front and brought the wheelie bins back round.

I loved being out in the rain. It was really refreshing. I don’t have a headache anymore.

So I am missing the Kinisi-flow class tonight as I have Kinesiology. Yeah I know it sounds like the same thing. I have a list to work on. While I know I am feeling SO much better than I have in a long time, things are really going my way…. However I’ve been out of sorts for a week or so now. I feel out of whack, out of balance.

I don’t cope well with having lots of things that need doing. Lists of things that I don’t want to do but that I know I have to do. I know we are all the same but I want to be able to go with the flow of life. I still don’t like it when I feel out of sorts. I need to try and make some peace with that.

Not every day in life will be bright and breezy. it’s how we react to it that matters. I’m so looking forward to talking this all through with Angela. Check her out on Inner Pathways.

Stay safe everyone 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

Day 1259 was going to be a quickie until I kept rambling 😂

It’s 8.23pm and it’s not often but I have very little to say.

I’ve had so much going on these last few days (most of it in my mind!!) that it’s quite nice not to have too many words swirling round in my head.

I haven’t felt great today but I’ve been much better this evening. Much calmer.

Work was good but actually just a blur, it went so fast! I took Khaleesi in with me again.

I only have 6 working days before I finish up for a full week off and I have SO much to do. Some of it just might have to wait. (Thousands of pounds worth of therapy to allow me to believe that!)

I had to drive to Bearsden after dinner tonight to pick up Leesi’s next prescription. The poor pup needs meds to control her pain. It’s so sad.

I’ve had some really icky feelings this last week or so. All brought on by fighting the insurance… I know that was the crux of it…. But…… all negotiated without any of my previous coping mechanisms that I used to use to to get me through the tough times. No wine, no mountains of Cadbury’s chocolate buttons. Just have to sit there and feel it all.

I’m really pleased that I’ve lost a bit more weight this week too.

At my worst when I was off sick I went up to 14 stone.

I’m down to 12 stone 2 lbs today for the first time in about 5 years. I had another lovely salad for lunch. im still really enjoying the fasting.

Anyway, I’m saying an awful lot for having nothing to say!!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1258 an end of an era as Abbie the Campervan drives away without me 😢

Oh wow, what a day. What a turmoil I have put myself through today.

I did not want to wake up and face what today would bring. I lay in bed with my eyes closed for as long as I could…. 7.11am! 😆

Craig and I were driving over to Livingston to meet the new owner of the van. She already paid up front so I knew it should be really easy but oh my actual word…. The anxiety…… bordering on panic attack. Tightness in my chest, breathlessness.

We weren’t meeting until 1.30pm so I had so much time to put myself through all that. I must have been a joy to be around. 😬 there were a few tears.

At times my head just won’t allow something to be easy, straightforward or calm.

It searches for the worst case scenario in every single eventuality. It’s the worst voice. The worst negativity. but my head revels in it. It can’t just allow me to believe everything will be ok.

I listened to relaxing music in the shower, it made me laugh at the cheesiness of it, but it really did help.

What’s the worse that could have happened?!?

I imagined it all. Over and over. Dramatising everything.

The reality was very easy and straightforward, as I KNEW it would be. I just couldn’t FEEL that it would be.

I was so nervous driving over. I drove really slowly and carefully. I’d taken out 4 hours of insurance to be able to do that. I had to talk to myself and take big, deep breaths. I hear myself, it’s pathetic.

My phone switched on to a Dr Rongan Chatterjee podcast.. called the “top 5 regrets of the dying”…. Not the best subject, given my mood, but a very interesting podcast. I thought we would all benefit from the sentiment.

“I wish I’d lived a life true to myself, not a life that others expected of me”.

Wow.

I can honestly say I’m much closer to doing that now, than I have ever been. My whole life up until now has been based on what was expected of me. I didn’t know there was any other way.

I do now. I do what feels right for me the majority of the time. I just struggle when I have to face things that I don’t really want to do.

Today was one of them. What happens if something went wrong with the van when I was showing them how it worked?!?

Anyway, she was really lovely and she loved Abbie.

We were with them for just over an hour showing them how everything worked. It went really well. She’s the kind of person that wouldn’t say a bad thing about anything.

There were a few tears (no shit, Sherlock!) but it’s just the end of an era. It’s 100% the right one for me but it didn’t make it any easier.

There’s a huge lesson in there, for me, today. I am still so very hard on myself. I put myself through so much stress, none of which is necessary. I do it all to myself.

Bye, bye Abbie. It was fun when the sun shone and everything was in the place where it was meant to be 😆

I should say here that this is difficult for me to write, it’s difficult for me to relive. These were really icky, vulnerable feelings.

But I say it how it is… or was…

I’m tired now but ready for the next chapter!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1257 supporting an inspirational lady swimming from Troon to Lady Isle and back 🏊🏼‍♀️🏊‍♂️ and other stories

I slept like a log last night. 3 caffeine coffees yesterday too, go figure. Not complaining.

Khaleesi’s first mum/previous owner was on TV yesterday being interviewed by Vanessa Feltz! Khal was out the count after a big day and slept right through it.

Craig got a great wee clip the other day when she was on Newsnight. It’s on his Scottish Dog Behaviourist page! I do wonder if she knows who it is?! 😂

I felt a bit antsy when I woke up… as if I should be worrying about something… I know how ridiculous that sounds but that’s what anxiety does. I have to say it’s 1pm…. I’m sitting writing this and I feel calm to the point I could just sleep.

I’ve said before, but the calm after anxiety is a wonderful feeling.

The feeling of cleaning your rain splashed glasses, and being able to see again, is equally wonderful. Don’t know why I didn’t clean them before now. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 hello blog!

I was up at 6am as I was heading to Ballast Bank in Troon. A very inspirational lady I know was swimming from Ballast Bank out to Lady Isle and back to raise money for River Garden Auchencruive. They do amazing work helping people to free themselves of addiction to drink and drugs. Chantal very sadly lost her partner to addiction a few years ago. She’s been talking about doing this since I met her swimming with Ellison and Eileen.

It was a pretty wet morning with winds forecast up to 14 mph…. Or knots… I’m thinking knots to be honest. Anymore than that and she would have to stop.

I’m dressed for the weather.

There’s a dredger out going up and down the channel that Chantal will be swimming across.

It’s pretty wet and mean and moody.

A very blurry photo of Lady Isle.

She has a friend swimming with her.

There she is waving at the boat!

Ready for the off.

We watched until they were almost invisible and then I headed to Morrisons in Troon for a food shop. It was a very healthy food shop!

I have to say that I am loving driver Bertie Beetle (I still feel the need to say I don’t actually call it that!! 😂) I think if I’d still been driving the van, I wouldn’t have gone down to Troon this morning.

I headed into Irvine and had a wander around Primark.

I got a pair of parachute trousers!! 🪂👖check me. How old do I think I am?!?

They are size 10/12 which is uh-mazing… they are obviously MASSIVE made (big made wasn’t quite large enough!) they were reduced from £18 to £10.

Also for a vest top and these teal joggers. They were £6.

Came home and got photos of the pups and took the OG3 out for a walk. This one of Khaleesi makes me laugh. Her face!

It’s stayed dry.

I went to pick Gayle up at 3pm and we headed up to Braehead Shopping Centre to get some currency for our holiday. We had a wander round the shops and I got some new trainers.

Chantal finished her swim in 5.5hours. What an amazing effort.

And just like that it’s 8pm! I’ve had a good day today. I love an early start and making the most of the day.

Most of all I love being calm.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1256 a very productive but anxious day…. 😔🫶🏼

Ok so another morning blog rant to record the actual state I am in just now.

Oh my god this car insurance thing is the gift that keeps on giving…. 😔

I’ve been awake since 3am.

I’ve made a list of all the things I need to do to try and stop my head from buzzing. I have 3 precious days off and yet I don’t feel anywhere near as happy as I should, at that.

Number one priority is to get this car insurance debacle sorted once and for all.

I should have just given in and paid the double insurance 4 days ago but the injustice of it all is pushing me to every last ditch attempt. I do not want to give up my 20+ years no claims too easily. I want to try every angle.

I’ve been on the phone to car insurance every lunchtime this week except Thursday because I forgot. Having Khaleesi in work was a good distraction. 😂

I moved down to the spare room at 3am so I didn’t disturb Craig. I wrote my list, read a bit and seems I did get back to sleep at some point.

The red is awake time. I know that’s nothing compared to some people but it’s so infuriating when I know I am causing all of my own stress through my own anxiety. I am making all of this happen.

I called Esure st 8.04am. I was on the phone for 12 minutes…. Only to be told it’s a decision for the underwriters.

Call back at 10am.

I hoovered the whole house.

I called back at 10.04am.

3 min tired of security and waiting to be hung up on.

Esure hang up calls when they are too busy.

Do it online.

I can’t. It won’t let me. It needs authorised by the underwriter.

I need to keep calling back until I can get past the 3 minute mark and get in a queue.

I burst into tears. (Yeah again)

It’s so bloody infuriating.

So I’m sat here having a good cry, writing this and I do feel a bit better.

There is some inner child inside me, having a total hissy fit that I have to go through all this. My teeth are grinding.

Today I will pay the extra premium if this last ditch attempt fails. I won’t tell them that though, if I can ever get through.

So, dog walk time it is. I split them in Freya and Bhruic and leave Calaidh and Khaleesi to last.

It’s dry and mild. We have a lovely walk. It does help so much to be out in nature.

I then came back and took Calaidh And Khaleesi up the hill. Calaidh can be off lead for most of it and Khaleesi gets a shorter walk.

It’s not the easiest having two Calaidh/Khal’s. As Calaidh was off lead I always call her back and Khaleesi thinks I’m calling her. She comes bounding towards me when I’m wanting the other one. It makes me laugh.

Watching Calaidh in the distance.

Checking out the cows…. look at her wee right paw… that’s the sore one. She has a hope, skip and a jump every now and then. She’s a wee soul.

So when I came back I dialled the insurance again….. SOMEONE ANSWERED STRAIGHT AFTER THE 3 MINUTE BLURB!

I was on the phone for 54 minutes. 😳

Esure will not accept the 23 years no claims either.

So they quoted on 3 years and I paid it.

I was obviously on hold for a lot of those 54 minutes…. the hold music was “Wonderful Wold” and “Amazing Grace”…

🎼🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶🎵

“I once was lost but now I’m found”

“… and I think to myself what a wonderful world”

🎼🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶🎵

It’s enough to calm my mind and realise how far I’ve come. The world didn’t stop turning because I only have 3 years no claims bonus on my car insurance.

It’s was such a relief to finally stop fighting. I was never gonna win, I just had to try.

Craig called to say he was on his way home so I suggested Mocha Jak’s for lunch. I needed cheering up and when you don’t drink, there’s always cake and coffee.

We both agreed we didn’t need the cakes…. AFTER we’d eaten them. 😆 The Biscoff Rocky Road was pretty special.

Once we got back home I spent the afternoon ironing.

I NEVER iron clothes.

Except when I have holidays to pack for. 🙆🏻‍♀️

It’s a bit early to be ironing for Turkey 🇹🇷 but at least a fair bit of it is done. I just might be a creased mess when I’m there.

I’ve fed the dogs. Hung up washing and run the dishwasher.

I am shattered now and just sat down. I might never eat again after that Biscoff Rocky Road.

This made me chuckle 🤭

Hope you all have a great weekend!

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1255 the day Khaleesi went to Tartan Campers & lovely dinner at Gro Coffee

It’s 8.42pm and I’ve been awake since about 4.30am….. I’m shattered but I’ve had a lovely day. I’ll make this quick!

I took Khaleesi to Tartan Campers today just to give her a different experience.

It was a very different experience for me. We often have dogs in Tartan but is the first time I’ve ever taken one in.

She was a wee bit breathless in the car on the way down. I made her a wee bed under my desk… she does look a wee bit sad here.

She relaxed into it.

She was super excited to go into the workshop. She was sniffing around and loved all the attention she got.

Here she is visiting Ellison in upholstery. She jumped up on this seat and sat smiling away, chuffed with herself.

Honestly she was amazing today. She never barked once, I was able to let her off the lead and wander around. She never moved as we all stepped over her at times. It was lovely to spend time with her.

I ran her home, got changed and headed back down to Irvine to meet Andrena and Linda,from the Fit Body Farm, for dinner at Gro Coffee in Irvine. (DECAF!!)

It was lovely and sunny when we arrived.

We had a selection of food between us. I love that. A chicken and peppers pizza, some crispy buttermilk chicken strips, some bread and oils and a caprese salad.

It was really lovely and so good to see them both. They are both so bright and cheery it’s lovely and warming to spend time in their company.

We’ve set our next date for 2 months time!!

Home now yawning my wee head off and Khaleesi has been out for the count all night Craig said! Too much excitement today.

Bless her.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1254 morning blog rant… 🤷🏻‍♀️😆

My head is all over the place this morning. Everything is swirling around and I can’t make a decision to save myself.

I sleep like a log but get so irritated at waking up early and not being able to go back to sleep for thinking. I’ve been awake since before 5 again. Making no decisions just running things around in my head.

As I said yesterday, life is good for me just now, things are going well and I’m going with the flow yet I feel sucked into a vortex again these last few days.

I know it’s just the insurance debacle. It’s taken over my life for the last few days. I have lots going on just now that I don’t really want to have to deal with so my anxious head screws it all around. I have to say I’ve dealt with this all very well but I know I’m second guessing everything just now.

Still on the Covid & Flu vaccine…. I have decided I will get it but for months I’ve mulled over should I get it before or after my summer holidays… what if it makes me feel sick and ruins my breaks away. What if I don’t get it and then I catch covid and can’t go away. What if, what if…. I’m just going to get it.

The girl who’s buying my van isn’t coming to get it until the end of September… when I’m in Turkey. Still having the van is causing me a lot of anxiety as it’s still my responsibility. She’s actually going to be in West Lothian this weekend and I wanted to try and get the van to her, but that just adds more for me to think about. I’ll have to get a days insurance, Craig would have to drive over with me and it will take up at least 3 hours of our weekend when I have enough to be doing.

I have two holidays to pack for. I know that two holidays is a lot of fun. I’ve been mulling around for ages about what to take but I don’t actually want to start dealing with it.

I need to short circuit this otherwise I will second guess everything all day.

This morning I know it’s too much and I came to work early to sit in the car and write this down. Bet I cringe when I look back on it tonight.

Yup, cringed! But it is what it is.

I’ve been a bit over anxious with everything today. I’m still miles better than I have been in the past. My mind is just whirring with so many things and won’t settle.

I’ve made a few decisions and that’s helped out some of them to bed.

I’ve just been to meet the Crochet Hookers and had a good catch up.

Candles lit and comfies on. And try to relax.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

Day 1253 how to loose 23 years no claims in one easy lesson

Ok so I lied. I said that once I’d explored every avenue, trying to get my no claims bonus reinstated….. if it didn’t work, it would be ok.

It is not as ok as I thought it would be. (great English, I know!)

I’ve cried through sheer rage and despair at the ridiculousness of the whole situation.

I guess, in true ME fashion, I have to use this as a warning to other people.

My life is going really well just now and I can’t let the sheer frustration of this, bring me down.

So be very careful if you buy a car while you still have another car. I realise that this doesn’t happen very often and it only happened to me because I had a redundancy payout to play with.

When the insurance company offers to mirror your no claims on your existing policy…. It’s very lovely of them as it gives you a bit of a discount. You get very excited and grateful as you are unable to prove your no claims as it’s still in use on the first car policy.

You accept their cheaper quote and move on.

When you sell that first car you MUST send the mirroring insurance company your no claims from the cancelled policy.

When I sold my last Beetle, I had no idea and didn’t send them any proof of no claims. They never asked for it as they say, they assumed I still owned the first Beetle.

They will not add the mirrored no claims bonus to the 3 years that I gained with them.

After driving carefully for 26 years I have 3 years no claims to show for it. I’ve paid for protected no claims all of my life.

For nothing.

It would cost them NOTHING to add the years together on one letter. Hey I’d even pay them and admin fee to do it.

Computer says no.

I put in an official complaint which was answered in 15 minutes (it takes longer to get through to them on the phone).

Manager escalated to Manager and escalated to Underwriter.

Computer says no.

Gone.

My Bertie Beetle insurance will double.

I should have read the small print they told me.

All my fault.

So I missed out on a lovely evening swim with Ellison tonight as I argued (very politely I should say) with the insurance company.

I did, however, make it to Kinisi-flow in the village hall. It was lovely and I forgot my irritation for an hour or so.

I’ll get over it.

I’ll never do it again.

Sorry for the moan.

It’s been a beautiful day today. Blue skies. I got sat out at lunchtime and it was lovely.

I’ve wasted too much time on insurance.

One last thing is to find a new policy with my 3 years no claims and be done with it.

Here are the girls in the garden this evening.

Stay safe everyone 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

Day 1252 a fairly normal day!

It’s 7.07pm and I’m sitting in front of the tv bonding with Khaleesi.

Bless her wee cotton socks. She’s such a sweetie!

I had another great sleep last night, we went up around 8.30pm. Back to early nights. I know I would have more energy if I did some more exercise but I can’t quite bring myself to do it.

I got up at 5.30 as Khaleesi wanted downstairs to see Craig. I got the dog food out the fridge and defrosted it in the sink as I had my shower… served it all up ready for the OG3 to come running down the stairs.

I fed Khaleesi.

I had 5 bags to take to the Cancer Research shop after work and Craig and I loaded them in to the back of the car.

By the time I headed back into the kitchen, all 3 bowls had been decimated!

I love how confused I was by that.

Really confused and couldn’t understand it until Khaleesi puppy nudged my leg!

Counter surfing is not something we’ve had to deal with much is as our 3 don’t have long legs…. 😂 lesson learned Mrs Four Breakfasts won’t get that chance again. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂🫶🏼

My drive to work was lovely…. Not having to watch for any potholes in the road is quite relaxing.

Last night I’d gone through all the Bertie paperwork and found that all the recent service and MOT was missing. I emailed the garage.

Pretty much first thing this morning they sent up all the paperwork and proved the car had been MOT’d and is due at the end of August 2024. Result. I’m really pleased as I was staring to think they had made it up…. Oh me of little faith.

I also had to use the wipers for the first time today and they were dragging really badly across the windscreen. So I messaged and asked for a new set to be sent up.

Boom they are sending them up!

The not such great news centres around the insurance. The no claims bonus.

Abbie’s insurance will only prove 3 years no claims. They say that when I took out the policy, they mirrored my no claims bonus that I had with my old Beetle. I bought the van in June 2020 with my redundancy and didn’t sell the old Beetle until October 2020.

I very vaguely remember this. At no point in time, in the discussion, did they warn me that I’d lose 23 years of no claims.

Currently I have lost 23 years of no claims.

I have to say that I don’t feel anywhere near as bad as I would have in the past.

I am irritated by the injustice of it. I still have a couple of avenues to follow up but it really isn’t the end of the world. It’s only a little infuriating. Jeez, what has happened to me?! I love it.

I feel calm about working every angle to resolve it. I don’t feel panicked about it. If the worst comes to the worst, I have to pay more money for my insurance. That’s not good, but it is ok, if that’s what need to happen.

I went home via Cancer Research and dropped off the 5 bags. I used to be sooooo anxious about doing that. Today… drive there… park… take them in… wee chat… back out… drive away. Easy.

I’ve folded away washing, done a poo pick, tidied the kitchen, filled the bins, put the blue cardboard bin out and cuddled with Leesi puppy since I got home.

As I cuddle her the other come up to sniff and say hello. I’m so proud of the way Craig managed their introduction. He’s done a great job.

The sky is lovely tonight.

That’s taken me 45 minutes to write and she’s still here.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️