Day 1029 fairly epic stomach cramps 😩 (sorry for the overshare, not like me eh?!)

Wow.

Stomach cramp to a new level today.

Don’t remember it being this sore since my early 20’s and that takes some remembering. 😂.

I have this memory of being at Uni, maybe in my late teens and having such bad cramp that my Grandpa had to come and pick me up and take me to Gran’s. 😳Mum and Dad must have both been working.

I can clearly recall the atmosphere in the car…. You could cut it with a knife! Poor Grandpa probably knowing fine well what was wrong with me but we were NEVER going to discuss it. That just wasn’t the done thing….. here I am pretending I’m fine while making random small talk, as I curled up into a ball on the passenger seat and tried not to cry.

Actually, writing that reminds me of being alone with Grandpa, which makes me smile and is lovely, though I still cringe and the unspoken words!

Paracetamol haven’t worked at all today.

I slept quite well, yet woke at 5.15am and couldn’t get back to sleep.

The pain has been coming in waves. It’s felt overwhelming at times. I’ve had to sit hunched over my desk, to stretch my back…. I’ve had to stand up straight and try to stretch out my stomach…. I’ve had to sit still…. I’ve had to move around and I still can’t quite find the right position.

Another memory, at work this time, just after finishing Uni…. I worked in the Glasgow University Court Office Reception. We used to sit and hug the heated kettle when we had bad cramp…. It seemed like a great idea at the time 😂😂😂 an office full of girls could get away with that!

I had to start eating at 15 hours of fasting this morning as I needed to take more painkillers, and didn’t want to on an empty stomach. The cramps were making me feel sick, maybe it was the empty stomach with the cramps that didn’t help.

Usually within about 10 minutes it would subside, but not today.

I got some respite mid afternoon thankfully but it seems to have come back since I’ve eaten dinner.

I’m sure tomorrow will be fine. Maybe even later on tonight. It never normally lasts long… but this one is pretty heavy.

Oh the joys…. Peri-menopause is the gift that keeps on giving. This is the price I pay just now for increasing my hormones to help keep my anxiety and other symptoms in check.

As painful as it’s been today, this is nothing compared to the monthly mental slump that I have had for so many years. Honestly, it’s night and day. I’m in pain, it sucks, it’s uncomfortable but my head is clear, my mood is not going down, it’s not making me slump. (Except physically I’m contorted 😳😂😘)

In other news we’ve been busy getting ready for the Scottish Caravan, Motorhome and Holiday Home Show. That’s a mouthful eh?!

The boys will set up the stand tomorrow and get it ready for opening on Thursday morning. I’m excited and looking forward to speaking to as many people as possible, selling the van we are taking for sale and selling as many conversions as we can!

Boss man has the vans place already. That’s the first stage.

So to end on a another positive. I’ve seen loads of positivity on FB today. In my 5.15am positivity scroll…. So I’ll post them here while I get myself into another stretching position.

I was the queen of people pleasers for a very long time!
I am so grateful that I got this chance to see life more clearly than I ever have
I was wanting to apologise for the blog today…. This is a topic no one really discusses… why does anyone need to know!?! Yet it’s all part of the journey and part of the story I seem compelled to tell. Life is not all hearts and flowers and sweetness and light. Some days give you stomach cramp while life goes on.
Always going to be fine
The less I react… the more peace I have
Butterflies and pebbles is a lovely follow
And this…. If I ever say no, I didn’t do it lightly…. It takes a lot of my energy to say no.
100%
Again 100%

Ok so I haven’t quite shared peace with the world today but I am trying. I’m off to hunt down a hot water bottle and see if that will help.

There’s always the kettle…. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️

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