Day 442 reflections on my new health plan at Fit Body Farm 🏋🏻‍♀️🤸🏻‍♀️🚴🏼‍♀️⛷and a lovely massage! 💆🏻‍♀️

I am so grateful for that amazing sleep last night. Until Calaidh barked at 5.50am I was dead to the world. Of course I couldn’t get back to sleep after her bark reminded me of every little tiny thing there was to think about…. And then some….Thanks pup…. 😬😆

I’ve been asked to reflect on my 6 week challenge at the Fit Body Farm and thought I may as well do it as part of my daily ramblings. Hey it gives me ready made content!

I bloody love it. I’m doing things that the “depressed me” would have never thought possible.

I’m lifting weights I wouldn’t have ever thought of and running loops of the farm garden without really thinking about it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not easy but I’m doing it and achieving most of it!

I love that it’s over before 7am and I have no time to even think about what I’m about to do. I love that it gives me the best start in a day, that amazing high of having worked out before you actually start your day.

I feel a difference in my clothes, I have way more energy and a positivity that only you get from working out. I know I can do this. I love that I am doing it.

I have changed my diet. Gone are all the processed cereal bars I used to eat. Gone are all the low fat options that I thought were the right choice. But the food is where I feel I have let myself down a bit.

I’m disappointed that I have not followed the 6 week plan with my usually high level of perfectionism. I feel guilty for the things I didn’t do properly. The stories I tell myself that justify my less than perfect actions.

I still can’t be bothered properly planning my meals. I can’t be bothered writing down or recording what I’ve eaten. It makes some inner child have a paddywhack inside me because I don’t want to have to do it. I have enough to do and I’m tired. I just want to eat and be done with it.

I am, however, making way healthier choices. I am eating way more fruit and veg. I just think I could have been more meticulous about it.

The food part is 70% of the weight loss programme. The exercise is just 30% of it and I’ve got that covered but I can’t stop huffing about the food part.

The biggest story I tell myself is that I’m too tired. That the 4.45am start 3 times a week is enough for me to handle.

I’ve had huge change in my life recently. I’ve gone from couch potato to gym at 6am, with a part time job and still putting these ramblings out on a daily basis.

I tell myself that it’s enough right now and for me I know that it is.

However if I want to make that big difference and lose more fat than I need to tackle the food part.

So I’ll see at the final weigh in what I’ve managed to achieve officially.

Why is it that after everything I’ve learned in the last few years, I still beat myself up for what I should have done rather than be very proud of what I actually did do?!?

Now I read that and realise I do have way more positivity than I used to have as I know there is opportunity in everything.

Wow, I love that last one. Really, really love it. It explains how I feel down to a tee.

So on the menopause front, sorry guys…. I did watch the Davina McCall documentary last night, Sex, Lies and the Menopause. It was amazing. So many people have told me to watch it and I “yeah, yeah, yeah’d” but the nurse says and I jump to it.

Davina was told she shouldn’t make this documentary as it would age her. People would look at her differently. How shocking is that?!? She said it goes to show that the menopause is hush, hush, not discussed, a dirty subject yet half of the worlds population go through it.

She tells us not to be scared of it as there is so much these days that will help you every step of the way.

The nurse also suggested I download the Balance app which I have done and there are loads of articles to read up on. It tracks your progress and makes suggestions.

So after work today I went to Subway for a ham salad sub and between there and the car wash I covered myself in sweet chilli sauce. Jeans, T-shirt , steering wheel and the seat. All over…. Sticky sweet chilli. The van is now clean…. On the outside and sticky as hell inside!

Then I had a massage at Harmony in Beith at 2.30pm so popped into my favourite gift shop beforehand. Lovely to see Gayle again and have a wee wander and buy some wee things!!

My massage was sooooo good. I almost fell asleep as it was so relaxing.

I’ve come back up the road and am in bed writing this. I have a Gateside Memorial Hall committee meeting at 8pm and I need a sleep before I go otherwise I’ll be nodding off by about 8.30!!

Nana nap here we come and I have two dogs with me already.

Now this next one stopped me in my tracks. This is so me and quite a few other people I know. We are very quick to apologise for ourselves. Wow. Know your worth.

Sending you all some love and make sure you all hear it.

Stay safe everyone ♥️♥️♥️